Ander

My alarm blares so loud I'm sure astronauts can hear it. I groan and stretch to grab my phone. I silence it, about to toss it somewhere random, when I remember. I have a class. I check the time on my phone. The class started 15 minutes ago.

I stand up and run to the bathroom. I don't want to shower, but I have to because I reek of alcohol. I bath, brush my teeth and don't comb my hair. A cap solves that problem. My outfit is a baseball cap, a shirt, the school blazer and a pair of jeans.

I run out of the dorms, then forget to carry my phone. I contemplate leaving it but I don't. There could be some important messages on it. As soon as I run back upstairs and grab it, it starts ringing. It's my mother.

“Yes mother?" I say as I get on my bike.

The only reason she's even calling me is because her precious child is either ignoring her or busy. She sighs million times, but I still don't end the call. "How are you honey? How's everything? Jesse? How is he?“

"I'm fine. Jesse's fine. Everything is fine.“ I connect my phone to my earbuds so I focus solely on my driving.

I predict was she'll do next, because this is not my first rodeo. Next thing I know, she's sobbing. I roll my eyes, focusing on the road as she cries her eyeballs out. “Everyone is fine. Why can't I be fine? I'm so lonely sweetie. Your dad has gone back. Angie left me. You've all left me. Nobody cares about me."

I really wish Archer were with me right now. He knows how to handle her tantrum storm. It seems like the right things always leave his mouth. I always say the wrong things. “You know that's not true." Doing this hungover doesn't make anything better. I shouldn't even be driving hungover but I am.

“Of course it is. I'm all alone in this big house. I've been having insomnia. I miss my babies."

I can see my lecture hall in view. While I park my bike and run up the stairs, I leave her to rant. Ending the call would just add to her reasons to cry. I throw the door open, silencing the whole hall. The professor turns to me obviously displeased at my interruption.

“I'm sorry." I say all the way to my seat. Mom thinks I'm apologizing to her so that's an added.

I sit down and don't even bother trying to catch up.

“All this would've been avoided if Angie didn't die. I miss my baby so much. There isn't any day I don't miss her. Her laugh, her sweet smile. She was a perfect soul."

My mind drifts. Suddenly it's 3 years ago. The rain is falling violently. Archie is arguing outside. He's screaming at the top of his lungs. My mind is foggy as I walk outside. Andrez isn't where I left him. He's the one Archie is shouting at. Going closer, I see why he's screaming. My sister's corpse is in-between them. Bloody and stiff.

“Excuse me," my eyes snap open immediately. "If you're going to come late and sleep in, then you shouldn't have bothered coming.“

I apologize again. Mom is still on the phone, but all I can hear is snoring. She's cried herself to sleep again. I end the call and try to focus on whatever the 4 foot 5 woman is saying.

"Have any of you watched the news recently? Or you're busy with your phones doom scrolling. “ I don't know why she pauses, as if waiting for people to confirm they indeed doom scroll. "There's been a series of campus fight outbreaks in 8 universities round the country. I'm going to need special volunteers to cover the story. “

Nothing is my business, till she continues. "You're going to be working with the film department. They're the ones in charge of the camera and all that. Both of you are going to work together to do your research and get a script. Now, I need 10 volunteers. “

Nobody raises their hand, so I do. The professor calls me to write my name on a sheet of paper. More people come till we're 10. "Okay. Latecomer, you're the leader. Mobilize your team and I want to see something presentable before the end of next month. Good day class.“

I'm smirkng all the way back to my seat. Woe unto Archie, but the universe can't stand to see Vicky and I apart. It's not possible. Speak of the devil because my brother is calling me.

“Yes, Archer Matheos. How may I help you?,” I ask in singsong.

"What's wrong with you? In fact, I'm not interested. Just get your ass over here. I'm at the arts center. Hurry. “

I can only imagine what unnecessary scolding my brother has in store for me. I'm walking towards my bike when someone taps me. I turn and I see three girls literally looking up to me.

“Hi. You're Anderson right?," the one wearing a beret hat asks. I adjust the thing and I can see her ears tint a little.

“Yeah. But you can call me Ander. How may I help you?"

“We joined the volunteer group you're leading. We thought it'd be nice if we introduced ourselves to you.“ This time, it's the one wearing jeans that talks.

I'm about to say something, but Archie calls me again. I know he hates being kept waiting. "I've gotta go now, but you can have my handles so you're free to text me anytime you like.“

I get one of their phones, type it in and high key enjoy the other two fight for it. I get on my bike and drive to the arts gallery, at the other side of the campus.

Archie is sitting down on one of the sculpture bench thingys. There's a frown on his face as he spots me. "Well your ice cream is all melted fool.“

"You called me here just for ice cream?“

"Nope. First of all, why were you so happy when I called you? What happened?"

“Nothing. I just love the education system." He looks at me like I've gone crazy but says nothing.

Archer takes a bite out of the cupcake in his hand. I try to snatch it but I receive a slap on the head first. “Concentrate. Mom was admitted today."

“Admitted where? Don't tell me you took her back to that place. I thought she said she hated it there."

“She does but would you prefer to stay with her. She's bored and lonely. Being in that house only brings her sad memories.“

I'm upset now. "So you put her in a loony bin?! You're supposed to get her some sort of maid or friend or something. You can make her happy. That place won't do it."

“Is your brain up your ass? Your mother is diagnosed with clinical depression. She won't be happy. She can't be happy because her daughter is dead. Can you bring back her daughter?"

I'm not thinking because I grab the collar of Archer's shirt. He pushes me off of him. There aren't many people here to they can't see how the precious Archer Matheos is fighting with his brother. “You know who is responsible for all this and you still let him roam free. Do you have a conscience?"

“I called you here to inform you about your mother. Why are you involving other people?"

“Because the other person is the reason our family has been chaotic. Super super chaotic. Mom is crazy, dad is avoidant. And don't you dare pretend like you're happy. You have your own pain. “

Archie's resolve breaks a little. I can see the hurt in his eyes. He misses Angie. Even more than any of us. They were the closest duo. I loved my sister, everyone did, but Archer adored the little girl. "I'm leaving. Go do whatever you want with your life.“

I want to call him back. Ask we sit like mature people and talk about the death of our sister and how it's affected our family over the years. I don't. I let him go.

I have another class but I don't go. Back in the dorms, I don't care to know who is or isn't there. I am so grateful to see Jesse there watching tv.

“Well you're back." He sees the look on my face, and if it's resembling anything I'm feeling, it's not a pretty sight. “What happened?"

I kick my shoes off and lay in my boyfriend's lap. He says nothing but caresses my face. Sometimes, it's okay to be weak. He taught me that.