Chapter 01: Stranger

Namayani ang malakas na palakpakan at hiyawan matapos ang outro ng kanta. Hawak ang bass guitar, binigyan ko ng isang tango si Collete.

“Good evening po, pwede na po kayong mag-request ng song,” ani Collete gamit ang tinig niyang kay lambing sa pandinig. Ngunit kahit gano’n ang paraan niya ng pagsasalita, kahit pa kasing buti ng anghel siya makisama sa lahat. Gagawa ng paraan ang isip ko upang makahanap ng butas na maaaring magpahamak sa akin. All this time, everything seems fine to their eyes.  I guess  I'm the only one who's fighting my cloud of thoughts. Dark thoughts that keep on bugging me, waiting for my body to collapse before dragging me down to my fears.

I tried my best to clear my negative thoughts. I tried to be strong even though I was feeling the strike of nervousness and fear again.

Collete pointed her fingers at the audience. She was describing the girl she wants to ask. Dahan-dahan naman itong lumapit at nagsalita sa tapat ng mikropono nang matawag.

“I love your composed song and I would like the request The Angel in Disguise,” the fan muttered as we witnessed how her eyes twinkled. 

College nodded before she smiled sweetly, something that immediately stunned the audience.

Sa aming banda, si Collete ang may pinakamalaking epekto sa manonood. Ani nila'y kakaibang ganda raw ang pagmamay-ari niya na hindi naman namin ikakaila. After all, her appearance is also a big help to us so that we could attract a massive audience.

Eleanor tapped the drumstick three times, I prepared to play as well. The first verse was enough to make them shout and go wild. But instead of being happy, I just swallowed and tried to join the happiness they were feeling'. Good thing that was our last song for today because I might feel worse if we’ll continue to play longer.

We were catching our breath when our performance ended. “Good job girls!” Sir Robie, our manager greeted us while holding the six white envelopes that I know my friends also know the contents of. None other than money. 

“Thank you very much,” I said. I'm always like this, trying to communicate and interacting with others the best that I can. I’m grateful that I could see an improvement already. My parents don't care about my condition and couldn't consider my suggestion fully. 

"Next week ulit, girls!" Kumaway kami sa kaniya at saka lumabas sa aming maliit na kwarto.

"Mauuna na ako sa inyo, ha?" We nodded. I flinched when Lyndsey took a glance at me.

"Eve, kumalma ka."

Instead of trying to calm myself down, my fears only intensified. I felt threatened because of her stares. Bumuntong hininga na lamang siya at binigyan ako ng isang ngiti. I knew that she was used to it. Nagpaalam pa itong muli bago pumasok sa kotse. We watched her drove away until we could no longer see her car.

"See you after two weeks! Ingat kayo!" Yumakap muna ako sa kanila bago umatras nang kaunti upang panoorin ang kanilang pag-alis.

I felt a shiver in my spine after facing the dark road. I felt a shiver in my spine after facing the dark road. Wondering how I can cross without being anxious and worried for myself. I started to step forward while clutching my black backpack tightly. It’s eleven o'clock in the evening, the cars were getting fewer and my only guide was light poles that were far away from each other.

Kailan ba matatahimik ang isip ko?

I hate myself for thinking that I might die. Maari akong mamatay sa susunod na linggo, bukas o maaari ring ngayon na mismo.

I heard laughter from behind me. I couldn’t look back, the only thing that was running through my mind was danger. I tried to walk faster but with each step I took, the clearer their voices and footsteps tingled around my ears. In a brief moment, I already looked like a person who got soaked in the rain of sweat. It’s hot even though I'm only wearing denim shorts and a white t-shirt.

Paranoia.

Natagpuan ko na lamang ang sarili na tumatakbo palayo. Panay ang mahinang pagtili ko na tila nanghihingi ng tulong. Narinig ko rin ang pagtawag nila sa akin. Paglingon ko'y tumatakbo na rin sila palapit sa akin. Namilog ang aking mata at iyon ang naging dahilan upang tuluyan nang lumubog ang sarili sa takot.

Hindi ko na pinalampas pa ang ilang segundo at mas binilisan ko na ang takbo.

Nawalan na lamang ako ng balanse matapos maramdaman ang matigas na bagay na dumikit sa aking katawan.

My sight started to get blurry, I realized that I'm about to cry. Kung hindi lamang sa isang pares ng kamay na humawak sa aking braso ay paniguradong bumagsak na ako sa daan.

"Hey, miss? Are you alright?" I blinked twice before my sight came back to normal. I pressed my head as I felt the dizziness.

"Help," I said with my hoarse voice. Nanginginig akong kumapit sa kanyang braso. My knees were shaking, any seconds now surely I'll get down.

In one swift motion, I felt his warm arm around my waist and pulled me to give me a hug. My lips quivered in shock. My heart was beating so fast, not because of my fear. Instead it was pounding.

I never thought being comfortable while I'm close to a stranger was possible.