 Masuk
Masuk
It was Valentine's Day. I was all alone on my desk, pretending to be deeply engrossed in the book I was reading.
But in reality, I was eavesdropping on the girls behind me. The “HAS” girls, (Hot And Sexy). A blonde, a brunette, and a black, straight-haired. The typical mean girls gang. I always convinced myself that I hated them. But right now, I envy them. They wouldn't stop gushing about the expensive gifts they got from their boyfriends and I was boiling with jealousy and self-pity. I was 19. I was a freshman in college. No guy's ever gotten me anything. And the few that tried, I always rejected bluntly. Because I was a girl raised with the “don't accept things from men” theory. Mum said accepting the gifts meant trading your dignity in return. So taking the gifts was impossible. Sometimes, I felt insulted by those gifts and lashed out at the guys. But deep down, I always wanted to know what it felt like to accept gifts and not feel insulted or guilty. Crazy, right? Yeah. I was a breathing contradiction. Because why was I craving something that I hated? It made no sense. “Oh, there you are.” The cheeky voice of my best friend brought me out of my funk. She was heading in my direction, dressed like some Latina badass. Smokey-eyed makeup and those cowboy knee-length boots. Skirts so short you'd see her black panties if she bent a bit. Cleavage, bold and fucking tempting. She was a striking, loud beauty. Curly blonde hair that screamed wealth. I was a quiet beauty, brunette, silently curvy, more natural without the extensions, nails, lashes, and dresses at normal lengths. I was just…Me. We had such different auras and it made no logical sense that we were best friends. She'd fit better hanging out with the HAS girls. Except she despises them a lot. I breathed out in relief when she sat next to me. Finally, I could stop pretending to be reading. “Guess who got asked out on a date?” she beamed, dropping the package she was holding on the desk. Jealousy ran through my throat like hot saliva and I gulped it loudly. I shouldn't feel this way. She was my best friend. I should be happy for her. “What…is that?” I asked, staring at the red package in the bag. “Fucking Louboutins.” She squealed in my ears. “Michael bought them.” “And you accepted?” My tone was judgmental. Why not? He was her Father's butler. They had a good seven-year gap. Creepy! Also…her Father would kill him when he finds out. Why would she take such an unhealthy risk? “Why not? He's fucking hot and you know I've wanted nothing but to choke on his dick ever since I set my eyes on him, girlfriend!” She squealed silently. “But your Father's never gonna approve of your relationship with him…” “And who's gonna tell him?” She rolled her eyes and ended it with a laugh. “Besides, don't you love a good forbidden romance plot?” Yeah. But only in books. Not in reality, I'd never. “I'm so ready for him tonight,” she cupped her perfectly sized boobs. “I can't wait to have him buried deep inside me—” Oh, boy. I can't listen to any more of this. “Good luck fucking your Father's butler.” I stood, taking my bag. “Where you going?” She pouted. “To study, something you know nothing about,” I smirked. She flipped me the bird. I laughed out loud and left the class. Down the hallways, everyone was giddy about their dates. I was the odd one. The girl with no dates. How I hate my very strict and boring life. I got to the library and returned the book I was reading. I was gonna leave but stopped and grabbed a dark romance book. A girl like me had no business reading a dark romance book. But I did, a lot. It was my guilty pleasure. This particular one would keep me occupied for the night. The day ended and I drove my best friend's car home because she'd taken a cab to go meet up with Michael. When I said home, I meant her house. I lived with her, not permanently. Just until Mum and Dad finalize their messy divorce process. I stepped out of the car and headed inside. There was no one downstairs. I headed for the staircase. “Is that you, sweetie?” A thick, deep, familiar voice made me halt. Shortly, he stepped out of the kitchen with a towel, wiping his hands with it. He was shirtless; which should be a crime, considering how dangerously and deliciously buff he was. Abs so thick from endless gym visits. He was toned than most younger guys and to think he's 40! An albatross tattoo was on his left breast. I've only seen him shirtless a few times and every time, that tattoo left me intrigued. His jet black hair was wet and disheveled. Face so taut and perfectly sculpted. Trimmed beards that only accentuated his deadly face card. He was damn tall too. My 5’7 height has always felt too petite next to him and I hated it. It was one of the reasons I always kept my distance from him. “Willow,” he said, smiling. That smile was just as dangerous. Why the heck was it so perfect? “Something wrong?” He asked. It took me extra seconds to realize I was gawking at him. Oh My God. I quickly looked away in embarrassment, releasing my pent-up breath. Jesus. What the heck, Willow? He laughed. It was a husky, croaky sound. “Where's April?” “She…uh…she had to go home with some friends. A group project.” Those were the lies April made me memorize just in case her Father asked about her. “And you? Why didn't you go with them?” I looked at him. Something about the question felt so genuine that it almost had me tearing up. “I'm not part of it,” I said in a small, hurting voice. But it was just me, feeling bad for myself all over again. Because I had no love life. “Oh.” He nodded. “I…uh…I made lunch. Omelette.” He cooks. Very well too. Years without a wife made sure of that. “I'm not hungry. But thank you.” I said and began climbing up the stairs. Shortly, I got to my room. I dropped my bag on the floor and the book on the bed. I went into the bathroom to freshen up. Then I wore a comfortable, baggy top and pants and jumped on the bed, ready to read the remaining hours of the day away. It was 9:00pm when I finally shut the book. I was already halfway through with it but I needed to take a break. My panties were soaked from reading too many steamy scenes. My heart was racing too. I needed a damn break. Just then, my phone beeped. I checked. It was from Mum. * Are you outside, dear? Do you have a date?* That question kinda pissed me off. She preached so much about keeping my distance from guys, so why would she wanna hear about my dates now? Wasn't that twisted? I texted back. *No, Mum. We hate men, remember? Sweet dreams.* I shoved my phone under my pillow, ready to dive back into my book. But then it beeped again, and now, I was getting irritated. What does she want now?! I clicked on the message. Mr. Joe Anderson. *Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think I saw you holding a really bad book, Willow. Ain't you supposed to be a good girl?* My jaw dropped.
I got ready for school, earlier than I should. Downstairs was empty, with no sign of Mum, which was great. I hurried out of the house, taking the first cab I could find. I gave him the address of where I was headed which was on a completely different route from my school. The address turned out to be an eatery. It was in the middle of a rich neighbourhood. I stared for minutes, unsure if I should go in there. It didn't look like a place for casual hangouts. But then it was the address given to me, so I had no choice but to go in and see if he was there. I paid the cabman and alighted from it. I was ushered in by very prim and expensive-looking waitresses. They asked for my name and led me to a table at the farther end of the room. “Dad!” I squealed when I saw him. He stood, smiling, arms spread apart for me. “My girl,” I ran into his arms, hugging him so tightly whilst shedding happy tears. Can't believe Mum's trying to starve me of this all my life. “Sit down, dear.” He pull
I spent the night at Mum's house. The meeting with the lawyer ended a bit late and she begged me to stay over for the night. Dinnertime was always an awkward silence. I ate my spaghetti with tears in my throat. I didn't even want to look at her. I just wanna empty my plate and go to my room. “How's school, baby?” She broke the silence with her warm gesture of wanting to start a conversation. “Fine,” I mumbled. “Anything new happening?”“Nothing,” “Willow,” she sighed. “I'm trying here but you gotta help me out.”“I don't want to talk about my school, Mum. I just need to know what winning the case means. Does it mean I'm never gonna see Dad again?”She ruffled her hair, stayed silent for seconds and then nodded. I turned to my food but I couldn't eat it anymore. Tears already clogged my throat so badly. “He's bad for us, Willow. We don't need him. We'll be fine, I promise.”But I need him. I need my Daddy. I don't understand whatever fights they're having as adults. I just know
I spent the rest of the day sinking into my thoughts. Mr. Joe Anderson was mad at me for agreeing to tutor Nathan. Seeing him so furious killed something inside me. And I wanna fix that. I wanna appease him. But it'd mean telling the Professor that I didn't want to tutor Nathan. But I can't do that. I might have enough nerves to challenge my peers but I don't have enough to flatly refuse an elder. And also, if he asks for reasons, what do I say? What do I tell him?I don't know what to do. I'm restless. Sad. Nervous. Anxious!After much thinking, I came to a decision. The last class ended and I left the hall with just one destination in mind. The boys' locker room. Nathan had to be there. I needed to talk to him. I stepped inside and was momentarily frozen by the number of guys here. They all turned to me, and an insane amount of cheering and whistling followed. “Look who came visiting. Willow Smokes in the house, boys!” One of them cheered. I never bothered learning their name
I was staring at the name on my phone's screen. Mr. Joe Anderson. I've been staring at it for minutes with a tempting thought to text him. I've never done that before but after the way he exited the dining area, I just can't help the thought. I just wanna know that he's not mad at me. Then again, since when should I be concerned if he's mad at me or not?My God. This is exhausting!I dropped my phone with a sigh, forcing my eyes closed. I'll just do it!!I sat up, grabbing my phone and clicking on the message icon.My fingers hesitated before they typed down a few words. *April thinks you're angry*April thinks he's angry? That sounded a bit…corny. But I couldn't think of a more neutral way to say it. To my shock, it beeped right back in a few seconds.*What do you think?*I thought for a while. *I think you were irritated by how loud we were*I waited, anxiously. It beeped. *I don't give a fuck about two giddy teenagers discussing boys*What does that mean? Another beep. I qui
“S…sir…” I stuttered, staring at him like he was a ghost. Maybe because I haven't properly seen him in a week. It's just glances, so looking at him like this feels new. He had a bland smile on his face, and he was staring at me, at Nathan, and at his grip on my hand. “Are you two done? We should get going, Willow,” he said, pointing at Nathan's grip. “Uh, we were detained, professor,” Nathan said, dropping my hand. “Not anymore. C'mon, Willow.”I walked stiffly to the door. He moved aside and I walked out of the hall. He followed seconds later. His bold strides behind me were making me very nervous. He wasn't even saying anything but I was already feeling the heat. We got to the parking lot and into his car. I struggled to put my seatbelt on because of my frantic fingers. I finally succeeded but he didn't start the car. His fingers were drumming on the wheel and his face was taut. The smile had vanished. Completely. “You wanna know how shocked I was when I found out you were in
“Is it just me or has Nathan Hunt been staring at you since we sat down?” April asked in a hushed tone, nudging me.“Huh?” I peered behind, looking at the sandy-haired, broody-eyed guy, Captain of the basketball team, leader of the most infuriating group of guys, a typical playboy, sitting a few seats away from us.Crazy enough, our gazes met. His lips thinned into a smile. I looked away instantly, slightly repulsed by the attention. I mean, I'm generally repulsed by male attention. It always seems lusty and superficial. The only one giving me a fever is a man way out of my league. Of all the guys in the world, why him?“He'll get over it,” I mumbled, trying to focus on the professor who was scribbling on the board.“Girl, c'mon. You need to loosen up a bit. Being uptight and strict won't get you a boyfriend.”“Who says I need one?” “Be for real, Willow. Everything about you screams ‘I NEED A BOYFRIEND’.”“You're crazy,” I chuckled. But it faded quickly. I've never really laughed or








