Hidden Feelings

Alexa 

The door is slammed shut. 

It’s a shame this is just the beginning of her getting provoked and I plan to relish on every moment. 

“Don’t act familiar with me. From now on we are only Boss and employee.” Ethan states. As if there was anything more in the past. I was like a sister to him then and now…

Alexa cut it out, you can’t be anything more than this anyways.

“Get yourself settled in your room, the guards will show you to the workers quarters, go through the file, we have an event tonight.” He informs, before returning to his seat, and I bowe before him before I turn to exit his office. As simple as it sounds it’s so hard for me to just walk out the door, without getting a hug from him, or a pat on my head. He’d ruffle my hair in the past, but now his gaze are so cold, like...like he hates me. 

The guard guides me to the workers quarters; the female workers quarters, with maids, and female guards, I am the only female office worker in the quarters but that doesn't warrant the weird looks that the others throws at me as I walk through the passage to my room. 

“You will be having your own room, to ensure smooth rest and efficient work even after work hours.” The guard informs before walking away. 

“Didn’t her father die here? Why has she returned.” I hear a voice whisper as I try to unlock my door. Their stares crawls on my back and it takes me lots of self control to not turn to them.

“Shameless, she wants to taint the Bouchards image like her father, why else would she be hear” 

“True, her father was such a disgrace, I heard he planned to rape the first lady also, he was mesmerized by her beauty that he forgot his wretched place.”

“I guess the daughter has come to take on his legacy and seduce-”

The door clicks open and I rush in slamming the door shut. My lungs feels tight, I tremble, only managing to search for my drugs in my handbag. 

Why is so damn hard to find?

“Shit” I gasp as I collapse to the ground. Thankfully, the orange pill bottle rolls out of my bag. Without water, I fumble it open, shake two tablets into my palm, and swallow them dry, barely able to breathe.

My racing heart only begins to calm after a while, and a laugh escapes my lips. 

What an Irony, I swore never to return to this house, I cursed at the same Ethan who is now my boss when him and his family came to pay their last respect to my father during his burial. I was just ten but I knew they were lying, they told the media he had committed suicide, that he had also made advances towards the first lady, but I know my father would never do that, he loved my mum so dearly, and Mother knew that, but she kept quiet. And I chose to do the same.

For years, I’ve lived with that pain until last week…the night I received that letter, the final evidence to push me to getting my revenge. 

I can’t recall how long I've been lying here, but a maid knocks on my door, I manage to ignore her judgemental gaze as I take the dress she had brought. I go through the file while changing into the red dinner gown. 

Tonight is going to be eventful. The pile of events and lists of people attending is great evidence. 

“This is a major test, that will prove if you can and willing to continue working with me, so consider this your interview.” Ethan states as we entered the car. 

I nod from the front seat despite my heart aches. It feels like he was saying one thing and doing the other, asking me not to be familiar with him and not taking the usual hiring procedures because he’s already familiar with me. Either way, this is for the better, I need to stay focused. 

The grand hall glows in the dark, red carpet flowing outside as we park in the parking lot. I thought about asking about Chloe. Since she’s his fiancée, it’s reasonable for her to attend such gatherings with him, but I fear losing a point, besides she being here will only make me more anxious.

The cameras flashes from different angles, it’s expected on the arrival of the new CEO of one the biggest oil industry in Canada. 

“Keep your head high, a slight bow can cause them to begin asking questions.” Ethan whispers, and I flinch, my heart skipping a beat, when his hand grazes my lower back. I swallow, and try to fix my posture, it’s thanks to him I realized, I am dodging the cameras. 

Though my heart is still racing, as the memory tries to surface, I shove it all down, and try to keep my head up high as Ethan advised. I need to pass this, I must stay in the Bouchard mansion, if Ethan should fire me, I would lose my chance of seeking justice. 

The crowd all watches as we head to our seat, it feels strange that I am walking by my boss by his side. We don't seem romantic, but it also doesn't  feel like I am by his side as an employee, regardless of how much space I try to give him, Ethan always pulls me closer. 

 Like now, while we are seated right on the same round decorated table with his family, I had bowed, and took a seat by his side, adjusting my chair to the middle but he had pulled me closer by my chair. 

“What is going here, Ethan, why is she here?” The great Logan Bouchard, one of the most richest man in the whole of Canada, Ethan’s father is the first to speak up. Of course seeing me terrifies him. After all he had done to me.  

“She is my new Personal assitant.” 

“That can’t be. Did Chloe agree to this?” Mrs. Bouchard Francisca is the next to speak up followed by Mrs Bailey’s; Chloe’s Mother glare.

I owe them no explanation, but I dofeign a smile, relishing on the irritation of their faces. After all they are the reason I returned, because one of them seated around this table, killed my father, it was in his last letter before he died. Unfortunately, Ethan is not excluded. 

"How do we know you're not here to revenge your father?" Bailey, Chole's Mother states. 

And I smile, despite my fingers are balled to a fist, and I'm about to speak when a hand covers mine, giving it a light stroke.