Shaking

Lia's hands wouldn't stop shaking on the steering wheel. She'd just slept with a mafia boss. A fucking mafia boss. Not some professional escort who'd disappear from her life after one night.

Not some safe, anonymous transaction. No. She'd walked into the wrong room and ended up in bed with Caspian Nero. A man who ran the criminal underworld of Silvercrest. What the hell had she done?

The early morning streets were empty as she drove home. Saturday dawn, the city still sleeping off Friday night. Lia felt like she was moving through a dream. Or a nightmare. She couldn't tell which. Her body ached in places that reminded her exactly what had happened.

The way he'd touched her. Kissed her. I looked at her like she was the only thing in the world that mattered. Stop it. Stop thinking about it. But she couldn't. His gray eyes. His hands. His voice said her name.

Lia pulled into the driveway of Ravencourt Estate and sat there for a full minute, trying to calm her racing heart. The house was dark. Julian's car wasn't there. Still out wherever he'd gone last night. Probably Vanessa's bed. Or someone else's.

Did it even matter anymore? She let herself in quietly, like she was sneaking into her own house. Went straight upstairs to the guest bathroom. Couldn't use the master. Couldn't go near that bed where she'd found Julian with another woman.

The shower water was scalding hot. She stood under it until her skin turned red, trying to wash away the evidence. But she could still smell him on her skin. Still feel the ghost of his touch. A mafia boss. Jesus Christ. What was she supposed to do now? Pretend it never happened?

Go back to her miserable life with Julian like nothing had changed? Except everything had changed. She felt alive last night. For the first time in five years, she'd felt like she mattered. Like she was seen. And now she had to go back to being invisible.

Lia got out of the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. Caught sight of herself in the mirror. Her lips were swollen from kissing. There was a faint mark on her neck that she'd have to cover with makeup. Evidence written on her skin.

She got dressed in jeans and an old sweatshirt. Not the designer prison uniform she usually wore. If Julian came home, she'd tell him she stayed at Isla's. He wouldn't care enough to question it.

Downstairs, she made coffee with shaking hands. Sat at the kitchen counter staring at nothing. Her purse was on the table. Caspian's card was inside. She'd shoved it in there this morning before leaving the hotel, not sure why she'd kept it.

Lia pulled it out now. Simple black card with a phone number. No name. Nothing else. She should throw it away. Tear it up. Burn it. Instead, she tucked it back into her wallet.

At ten-thirty, she heard Julian's car in the driveway. Lia's stomach twisted. She poured a second cup of coffee, trying to look casual. Normal. Like she hadn't just cheated on him with the most dangerous man in the city.

Julian came through the door looking like hell. Rumpled suit. Hair a mess. He smelled like expensive perfume and sex and alcohol. Didn't even try to hide it anymore.

"Morning," he said, not looking at her. Already on his phone.

"Morning. Coffee's fresh."

"Thanks." He poured himself a cup, scrolling through emails or texts or whatever. Some woman, probably. "Where were you last night?"

Lia's heart hammered. "Isla's. I told you I was going out."

"Right. Yeah." He wasn't even listening. "I'm gonna shower and head to the club. Golf with Dad and some clients."

"Okay."

He walked past her without another word. Like she was furniture. Like she didn't exist. Five years of this. Five years of being nothing to him. Lia waited until she heard the shower running upstairs. Then she pulled out her phone. No new messages. No calls. Nothing from Caspian. Why would there be? It was one night. A mistake. He'd made that clear this morning when she left. She was a complication he didn't need.

Her phone buzzed in her hand. Unknown number. Lia's breath caught. She opened the text. A photo. Her black lace underwear on white hotel sheets. And below it a message that made her face burn hot.

"You left something behind. Black lace looks better on you than on my floor. -CN"

Heat flooded her entire body. Oh God. He had her underwear. He'd kept it. This was insane. This whole thing was insane. Lia blocked the number with shaking fingers. Deleted the text. There. Done. Over. She wasn't doing this. She wasn't getting pulled into his world. Last night was a mistake. A moment of weakness. It couldn't happen again.

Her phone buzzed again. Different numbers. Lia stared at the screen, heart pounding so hard she thought it might break through her ribs.

"Blocking me won't work, sweetheart. We need to talk. Tomorrow. The Onyx Club. 8 PM. Don't make me come find you."

The Onyx Club. Lia had heard whispers about that place. Underground casino and club downtown. Where rich people went to do illegal things. Drugs. Gambling. Worse. She'd never been there. I would never go there. Except now Caspian was telling her to show up. She should ignore it.

Block this number too. Pretend she never got the message. But even as she thought it, she knew she wouldn't. Because part of her wanted to see him again. I wanted to feel alive again. Even if it was dangerous. Even if it was stupid. Especially because it was dangerous.

Lia set down her phone and finished her coffee. Julian was still in the shower, probably scrubbing off evidence of whoever he'd been with last night. The irony wasn't lost on her. She picked up her phone again. Stared at Caspian's message. Tomorrow. 8 PM. She typed back before she could stop herself.

"I'll be there."

The response came immediately. "Good girl. Wear something nice. And Lia? Don't tell anyone where you're going."

She deleted both messages. Blocked this number too, though she knew it wouldn't matter. He'd just use another one. Caspian Nero didn't take no for an answer. She was starting to understand that.

Julian came downstairs twenty minutes later, clean and dressed in golf clothes. He grabbed his keys without looking at her. "I'll be back late. Don't wait up."

"I never do."

He paused at the door, finally looking at her. Really looking. "You seem different."

Lia's heart stopped. "Different how?"

"I don't know. Just different." He shrugged. "Whatever. See you later."

The door closed behind him. Lia sat alone in her huge, empty house and tried not to think about tomorrow night. About walking into a dangerous club to meet a dangerous man. Tried not to think about how much she wanted to. Her phone buzzed one more time. Another unknown number. Of course.

"And Lia? About last night. Best mistake you ever made. See you tomorrow."

She should be scared. Should be running in the opposite direction. Instead, she was already planning what to wear. She thought about the emerald dress she'd worn to the hotel. Too obvious. Too much like she was trying. She needed something else.

Something that said she wasn't afraid of him. Even though she was. God, she was terrified. But she was also tired of being afraid. Tired of playing it safe. Tired of being the good wife who did everything right and still ended up with nothing.

Lia went upstairs to the guest room where she'd been sleeping for weeks now. Opened her closet and started pulling out dresses. Black. Red. Navy blue. She held each one up to the mirror, trying to see herself the way Caspian might see her Strong and Confidence.

Someone worth risking everything for. The thought made her laugh. Risking everything? She had nothing left to risk. Julian had already taken everything that mattered. Her dreams. Her self-respect. Her sense of who she was.

Maybe that's why last night felt so good. For a few hours, she'd been someone else. Someone brave enough to walk into a stranger's hotel room. Someone desired. Someone who mattered. She settled on a simple black dress. Elegant but not trying too hard.

With heels that made her legs look good and gave her enough height to look Caspian in the eye. Not that she'd need the help. He was tall. Really tall. She remembered having to tilt her head back to kiss him.

Stop it. Stop remembering.

But the memories kept coming. His hands in her hair. His mouth on her neck. The way he'd looked at her like she was the most important thing in the world. Like he'd die if he couldn't touch her.

Julian had never looked at her like that. Not even in the beginning when they were young and supposedly in love. He'd looked at her like a prize he'd won. Something to show off to his friends and family. Proof that he could get whatever he wanted.

Lia hung the black dress on the back of the door and lay down on the bed. Tomorrow. She had twenty-four hours to change her mind. To come to her senses. To remember that Caspian Nero was dangerous and getting involved with him was the stupidest thing she could possibly do.

But she wasn't going to change her mind. She knew that already. She was going to The Onyx Club tomorrow night. She was going to see him again. And whatever happened after that, at least it would be her choice. Her decision. Not Julian's. Not Margaret's. Hers.

For the first time in five years, Lia felt like she was taking control of her own life. Even if that control led her straight into the arms of the most dangerous man in Silvercrest.