LOGINChapter 258
DARRENVal did not say yes. She did not say no.She stood very still in the middle of her room, holding my phone against her stomach, and waited. That was answer enough. Val never waited for anything she did not want to hear.I looked down at my hands. I rubbed my thumb across my knuckles, the ones that had hit nobody tonight, and tried to find where to start."He got tired," I said."Who?""Damien. He got tired, Val." I lifted my head. "Of all oChapter 267ADRIAA thief wants money. A thief would have taken the passport and the key and the bank papers. A thief would not leave a fortune lying in a box and walk away with one sheet of paper.So this was not a thief.This was someone who did not care about the money. Someone who already had money. Someone who opened a box full of everything a person could want, and looked past all of it, and went straight for the one thing that told them what Damien knew.What had he written?I sat there in the dark and tried to imagine it. Maybe it was a love letter. Maybe it was only that. *I love you, I'm sorry, here's how to leave.* That would be like him. That would be enough.But he had written *If I forget.* And if he knew enough to write that, he knew enough to write other things. Who was going to do it. Why. Where they would take him. What the council was. Maybe what Mila wanted. Maybe what he had found out in sixteen years of searching for a girl in
Chapter 266ADRIAI did not open it right away.I sat on the rug with the box on my knees and looked at the broken lock. I touched the scratch with my fingertip. The metal was sharp at the edge, and bright. It had not had time to go dull. This had not happened months ago. It had happened recently. Days, maybe. Maybe hours.My mouth was dry.I looked at the study door. Still closed. I listened. The house was quiet. Somewhere far off, the old clock ticked in the hall, and the heating made its small knocking sound in the walls.I lifted the lid.Paper.That was the first thing. A stack of it, neat and flat, held together with a black clip. I tilted it toward the window so the moonlight fell across the top page.It was a bank statement. Not from a bank I knew. The name was foreign, and the address was in a country I had only ever seen on a map. Halfway down the page, in plain black letters, was my name.*Adria Castellan.*And under
Chapter 265ADRIAThe man who had stood in Damien's office in the dark and put a phone in my hand. The man who sat in the car today and looked out the window so I could cry in private. The man who gave me ninety seconds of my husband's voice, the most important ninety seconds of my life.He was the same man who had picked up a pipe and beaten a boy on a concrete floor.The same hands.I did not know what to do with that. I sat there and turned it over and over, and it would not settle into one thing. It kept being two things. A man who did a terrible thing. A man who did a kind thing. They did not cancel each other out. They just sat there side by side, both true, both heavy.I thought about Kieran's scar. I had never seen it. He said it was on the back of his head. Darren put it there.I thought about Damien standing in the warehouse, sixteen, watching. And then Damien climbing through a window a week later to hold the boy who did it.Nothing
Chapter 264ADRIAI could not sleep either.I had tried. I had lain in our bed, on my side of it, the way I always did, even now. Seventeen nights, and I still could not make myself sleep in the middle. His side was cold and flat and smooth. I kept my hand on it anyway.I could still hear him.Not really. But in my head, the phone call kept playing. *I love you. I will always love you.* Then the footsteps. Then the click. I had heard it so many times since the car that it had started to sound like a song I could not turn off.At a quarter to two I gave up. I sat up and turned on the little lamp. My hands were dry from crying, and I rubbed in some of the vanilla cream from the jar on the dressing table, because it was something to do with them. Damien used to say the whole room smelled like a bakery because of that jar. He used to say it like a complaint, and then he would lean in and smell my neck.I put on my robe.I had not thanked Darren. T
Chapter 263DARRENAnd maybe right now, tonight, she was lying awake in that big country house, staring at a ceiling like I had been, wondering if he was alive. Or maybe she knew. Maybe she had been told and she had said yes. Maybe she had sat across from the old men at the long table and nodded and said, *Do what you must.*I did not know which was worse.I could not stand not knowing.I pushed myself up off the floor and reached for my phone on the bed."What are you doing?" Val said."Calling her.""Who?""Aunt Rosalind. Right now." I woke the screen. My fingers were already moving. "She'll pick up. She always picks up for me. I'll just ask her. I'll just ask if she knows where he is.""Darren, no.""It'll take one minute—"Val was up off the floor before I finished. She moved fast, the way she always moved when it mattered, and her hand came down flat over the screen of my phone."No," she said. "Listen to me
Chapter 262DARRENI do not know how long we stayed like that.Her hands on my face. My hands on her wrists. Both of us crying, though I was trying not to, and she had given up trying a while ago. Her tears fell off her chin and onto my sweater. I did not care. I held on to her wrists like they were the only solid thing in the room.At some point my legs stopped holding me up properly, and I slid off the edge of the bed onto the floor. She came down with me. She did not let go of my face until we were both sitting on the old wooden boards, our backs against the side of the bed, our knees pulled up.Like kids.We used to sit like this when we were small. In the hall outside our parents' room when they were fighting. In the back of the big closet at the summer house during hide and seek, when nobody ever found us because Val always picked the best spots. Side by side. Shoulders touching. Not talking.We sat like that now.The lamp was still on a







