Chapter 3

The next morning, Lauren and I go out to pick up our maid of honor dresses. Since Alice doesn’t have a sister, she chose us both to stand up with her. Her brother will be Ryan’s best man alongside Chad. 

Lauren and I picked two simple, but incredibly beautiful, silk olive green dresses. After the ceremony at the church, we’ll go back to our family ranch where the reception is being held. I wasn’t so sure about it at first, but now I can see it’s actually a good idea. I know every single shortcut in there, and if I want to—or need to—I can hide or escape to the house in no time.

“Aren’t you glad Alice picked a color that looks good on both of us?” Lauren asks, admiring herself in the mirror while we do our final fitting to make sure there isn’t anything to be sewed or fixed before we take them home.

I admire myself too, seeing the fabric hold my curves in the right places. I do look nice in it. My chestnut-brown hair doesn’t stand out as much as Lauren’s, but I like the way it accentuates my fair skin and the freckles on my nose—which I’m actually fond of.

I ignore the way my brain reminds me of how much Spencer used to love my freckles too and nod at Lauren. “Yeah, green suits us.”

I can see Lauren’s eyes darting from my face to the floor and back to me, as if she wants to say something but is not sure if she should. She has a good heart and is compassionate. She’s a good sister to me. We’ve always been close, and I trust her with all my heart, even if sometimes she can be super nosy.

However, I can tell she’s genuinely worried about me, so I take a deep breath and decide to address this in a serious way for once.

“I am okay, pony.” That’s what I’ve called her ever since she was three and begged Dad to get her a pony for her birthday. It began as teasing, but eventually, it became a thing between us, and she started calling me that too. Now, it’s just a loving nickname we use with each other. “Really.”

“I know you are! It’s just that…” She sighs, turning to look at me face-to-face instead of through the mirror. “I remember how this was a terrible period for you, and I don’t want to see you go down that hole again.”

I smile fondly at her, grabbing her hands and squeezing them. “Look, I know you’re all worried about me, and I do appreciate it. But I’m stronger now. I won’t let him get to me. And I promise you that, if I feel somewhat sad or uncomfortable, you’ll be the first to know, okay?”

“Okay…” Lauren finally seems convinced, and I drop my shoulders. “It’s a promise. You tell me, and I’ll punch Spencer in the face and take you away from the party, hear me?”

I chuckle, nodding at her. “Poppy said she’d do the same thing.”

“Poppy knows the deal,” Lauren adds with a shrug, turning her attention back to her reflection in the mirror. “I love you, pony. And you can count on me any time. You know that.”

I smile at her, ignoring the sudden lump forming in my throat. Lauren and I don’t normally show affection toward each other, rather choosing to show our love through bickering and teasing, but I know she loves me and will do anything to see me happy. Just as I am there for her no matter what. Knowing I have Poppy and Lauren on my side is enough for me to put my fears and insecurities behind me and focus on the day ahead.

This is an important moment for my brother and my family, and a guy shouldn’t be able to ruin this for me. So, with this renewed determination in mind, I take off my dress and head back home with my sister so we can start getting ready.

The ranch is pure chaos by the time we return, and after checking if anyone needs my assistance, I go to my bedroom to take a shower and get my hair and makeup done. Lauren rushes to her old room, saying she’ll meet me when she needs help with her eyeliner—something she can’t get right no matter how many video tutorials she watches.

Thankfully, I’m skilled at that.

It takes us three hours to be completely ready and waiting by the front door.

“We’re going to be late,” Dad complains, waiting by his truck with the driver’s door open. “Just get in and let’s go!” He slides behind the steering wheel, and I climb onto the back seat.

“Where’s Chad?” Lauren asks, following me while staring back at the house, searching for our brother.

“He’s picking Ryan up, remember?” I answer as we watch Mom walk out of the house looking like a Hollywood queen.

She gets inside the car. When Dad kisses her in front of us, Lauren and I fake vomiting, and after that, we finally head out.

People say that weddings make us emotional and thoughtful, and well, they aren’t lying about that. It’s inevitable to imagine certain scenarios when you cross those beautiful old wooden doors and spot the colorful glass windows around, the painted ceilings, and the majestic and ethereal architecture of the church. 

I would be lying if I said I never imagined being the one walking down this aisle. I lost count of how many times in the past I pictured my wedding day with Spencer. I don’t regret that. I was too in love, completely infatuated by him, so I really thought we would one day be husband and wife.

But life had other plans for us.

As Mom and Dad walk to the back of the church to meet Father Joseph, Lauren and I head toward Chad, Ryan, and Poppy, who are gathered in a corner, talking enthusiastically.

“Hey, guys. What’s up?” Lauren greets them as soon as we approach them.

“Everything all right?” I ask, taking in their faces.

“Yep,” Chad replies with a grin. “Just giving Ryan the last chance to run away from this. I can distract Mom and Dad, and you can distract Alice.”

I throw my hands up, smiling at them. “Don’t count on me for that, bro. Alice can be really scary when she wants to be.”

“You’re not wrong about that,” Ryan muses in a low voice. He seems a bit nervous, fidgeting with his fingers.

I look around, making sure no one is close enough to hear us, and stare back at him. “You’re sure about this? It would be okay if you aren’t,” I say softly.

Chad and Lauren nod eagerly. Poppy remains quiet, and I know that even though she’s known my family since forever, she doesn’t feel like this is a conversation she should be part of.

Ryan kindly smiles at me, and warmth spreads through my heart as I realize this is it. My oldest brother is getting married and starting his own family. This gives me a bitter feeling, knowing life will be somewhat different now. I always struggle with changes. Ryan doesn’t live at the house anymore, so it’s not like it will be a drastic change, but still… The realization that he will have his own family now weighs on me.

“I’m sure of it. Alice is the love of my life, and I can’t wait to marry her,” he replies. “Thank you for being so supportive, though. All of you,” he adds, glancing at our siblings. “It means a lot to know I’ll have you all by my side no matter what.”

“Of course, man. That’s what we’re here for,” Chad remarks cheerfully, patting Ryan on the shoulder. “Just don’t show up at my place when Alice sends you to sleep on the couch. I might have someone over.”

“Ew, Chad. You should man up and stop being such a playboy,” Lauren complains, rolling her eyes like she’s repulsed. She lowers her voice. “No one will ever want to marry you when you have your dick inside a different woman every night.”

Chad seems offended for a moment, but then widens his grin, turning to Poppy. “Poppy would marry me, wouldn’t you?”

She chuckles, unbothered by his flirtation. “Of course. In your dreams I would.”

I cover my mouth with my hand, preventing a loud laugh from coming out. Chad’s expression is priceless, and we all have to do our best not to make a scene inside the church.

Our bonding moment is soon interrupted when Mom and Dad rush us to the entrance so the ceremony can start. I notice immediately that Spencer isn’t around. I’m starting to wonder if he decided not to come. It can’t be a comfortable thing for him to do either.

As I walk down the aisle to get to my maid of honor position by the altar, I spot Spencer’s sister, Aubrie, with her husband and daughter, and I briefly nod at them. They have always been nice to me, and there’s no reason for me to be anything but kind to them. They didn’t break my heart and throw the pieces to the wind like Spencer did.

By the time Alice shows up, looking divine in her white perfect princess wedding dress, my brain gives me a break and forgets about Spencer. For a moment, all I can pay attention to is this beautiful bride walking toward her husband-to-be, looking as happy as I’ve ever seen her, the future ahead of them so uncertain, but at the same time, so secure.

If the expression on my brother’s face is any indication of how much he loves her, I believe they will be fine.

But then, something shifts my focus. In my peripheral vision, I can see someone sneaking in through the side door, walking toward one of the last pews as careful and silent as a person could ever be.

And I make the mistake of turning my head to see who it is.