CHAPTER 1

Damien's POV

"Damien, stop. Please! You're hurting yourself." Beta Mason begged me from the door of my room. But he couldn't take a step in. He shouldn't. Ignoring him, I continued throwing my fist to the mirror again and again until I could no longer raise my arm. Blood poured from the holes in my fist.

I was already getting tired, so I staggered into the bathroom to wash the blood off my hand. As I walked, I purposely stepped on the broken pieces of glass that lay shattered on the floor, causing my foot to bleed as well.

Getting into my bathroom, there was yet another mirror. Each time I saw him in the mirror staring at me, I felt a usual anger, this extreme hatred! The feeling always came back. So, I began to punch the mirror as well until I could no longer see him. Just the reflection of his pieces.

"Open up! Damien open the goddamn door!" I heard Beta Mason shout from the other end of the toilet door, banging it hard.

I was too weak to respond or even move, my hand felt paralyzed. I simply sat on the toilet seat and let the blood flow freely as my tears were also flowing without any resistance, bringing shame on the pure white tiles on the floor of my bathroom.

"What do you want, uncle? Just… just leave me alone!" I managed to speak. I had refused to eat dinner last night and breakfast this morning. My stomach churned inside me.

"Look, I know it hurts, Damien. But you can't keep killing yourself like this. You are the next Alpha of this pack. We need you to be strong Damien." Mason said.

I scoffed in anger. I hated the very word 'Alpha' as much as I detested my father, but couldn't show it. If I was made the Moon God, I would give everyone the freedom to live and be free from the rule of any Alpha. They, to me, were all devils and deserve to die.

"Damien, you're bleeding. You will lose a lot of blood. You know your father will kill me! Think of this, is this what Clara would want for you? Or grandma?" Beta asked, trying very hard to buy me out of the bathroom.

"Clara. Clara… is she.. is she here?" I quickly stood up and opened the door, my eyes red from too many tears pouring out, only to see Mason and Lily - the pack doctor, waiting in my room.

"Where is she? Where is my Clara?" I asked eagerly. I could kill and die to get to the love of my life.

Beta Mason sighed. "I know it's hard to accept, but you know she's already dead. It's been 3 weeks now. You have to move on Damien. You will be turning 18 in 2 days, you will definitely find your mate and love her. You just need to be…"

"Don't!. Don't you ever compare Clara to anyone, not even my mate! Fuck the Moon Goddess with the fucking mate thing." I roared.

Beta Mason was finally able to calm me down. At least for Lily to administer me treatment for my wound. Maybe he was right after all. Maybe grandma Nora wouldn't want me hurting myself like this.

As Lily bandaged my hands, I felt no pain. All I could see was the picture of Clara and me hanging beautifully on the wall. I never knew this was the last picture we would take together.

She looked beautiful that day. Her blue eyes, her curly hair. She loved rose flowers. Grandma Nora and her wolf were very fond of Clara. I had promised my love that we would get married and we would be Alpha and Luna, even if I eventually get mated, we vowed to reject our mates.

Her voice rang in my head over and over again as I watched my… My own girlfriend screamed for help as she was being killed, but I stood there, handcuffed and what could I do? Nothing! I watched my father order for her to be killed to secure his fucking secret.

"Damien" Mason called out to me suddenly. He had been staring at me for the past few minutes.

I turned to look at him, my eyes still swollen and red.

"I have news from your father. Trust me, I really do not want to say it, but I have to." He began and waited for me to give him the go-ahead to speak.

I simply stared at the document he was holding. I said nothing. My father's news was always a bad one. As bad as his marriage life.

"Your father will be travelling out of the city tomorrow, and he is leaving you in charge of the pack. So, practically, you are the next Alpha and will be observing a celebration party tonight. He has called on all pack members and other pack members as well."

Mason paused. He saw my eyes fuming with anger. I had warned him never to talk about me being an Alpha ever again.

"Thanks Lily. You can leave now. All the medicine he needs, please, let me know. And make sure Alpha Derek knows not a thing about this. Are we clear?" Mason forewarned Lily.

"Yes Beta. Not a word." She then turned to me "Take care of yourself Damien. The past is in the past. You can't change it. You can only make the future better!" She said consolingly. But again, I ignored her.

After Lily had left, Mason moved closer to me. Gently and cautiously, he put his arm around my shoulder. I was wearing a black shirt and plain black jeans. Same colour of clothes I had been wearing ever since my heart turned ice.

"You were the most loving person in the world. You loved people and always helped the pack members even at an early age. Everyone couldn't wait for you to be Alpha. They'd assume you would be like your father. Or even better."

Slowly, my rage began to cool off, but my eyes remained swollen. I began to feel the pain in my hand. Asides Clara and mamah Nora, Mason was the next person to my heart. He was the only man I saw as a human. He had always protected me at all costs. When Clara was being killed, he honestly did everything he could to stop his brother, but he failed. He loved her too. He knew the pain of losing a woman you love dearly. And so, he vowed to help me walk through the shadows.

"Your father and mother don't deserve any good thing life has to offer. They brought out the villain in you. But Damien, you can be different. You can be a different type of Alpha."

I raised my eyes up, my gaze fixed directly at Clara. "What's the point? I become Alpha and what makes you think I'd be any better?"

I stood up and exuded my pride and arrogance "Uncle. I don't care about the pack, and I don't care about anyone. If my dad's leaving, then I'm leaving too."

I got up and grabbed my black leather jacket from my bed and my car keys from my reading table which I had not used for 3 weeks now, and I began walking out of the room when Mason grabbed my hands.

"Don't Damien! You know the Alpha. He would kill me and you would be in trouble. The Moon Goddess will…"

"I'm sorry uncle. Fuck the Alpha. Nothing and no one can and will heal me! I need some time alone." I left the room and managed to sneak out, I got to the garage and drove to anywhere my tears would lead me.