Chapter 4 - Good morning Beautiful

“Thank you so much for coming to do my hair at such short notice. I know I should have made an appointment and I promise this won’t happen again. I ‘m just so grateful you squeezed me in.” I hear Freddie’s mother say to someone in the other room. I half listen to her as I wait for Freddie to come back from the kitchen with a glass of water for me and a beer for him.

He invited me over to his house to watch a game. I don’t even watch soccer like that but I was happy to receive his invitation. I needed to get out and breathe. I haven’t had a full conversation with another human being in over a week. I moved here a month ago and I don’t know anyone apart from him. I was losing my mind staring at the walls in my apartment.

I tried going out and exploring the city but it didn’t work out. I couldn’t find anything that caught my attention for more than two seconds.

The idea of moving to a new town, where I didn’t know a single soul was exhilarating when I thought it up. But now that I’m here I can say without embarrassment that it was an enormously stupid idea.  I chose the wrong city to move to.

I miss home, I don’t miss the people. I miss the familiarity of home. I travel a lot and I’m used not seeing the same face more than once. And I enjoy meeting new people and seeing new things. But I didn’t think through the moving permanently decision.

This is boring as hell.

I am an artist; I create art that evokes emotions, conversation and even tears. I need inspiration to create that is the reason why I came to this town. I came to get a fresh and new perspective on life. But I fear in the month I have been here, I got nothing. I know inspiration and creating takes time and patience but this town feels dead. I’m not getting anything.

There is nothing for me here. Even the social scene is dead. Making friends is a pain, I was lucky to meet Freddie my second week here. We ran into each other at a bar and we clicked instantly. We’ve hung out a couple of time, he’s a cool dude but I can’t really call him a close friend.

But I am happy to be out and talking to other people.

“I had to come and help you out.” A deep, soft and drawly voice says. “I can’t let you go to a wedding with your hair like this. I got you.” The voice goes again and I stand up from my chair.

“I’m so grateful.” Freddie’s mom says and I block her out. I want to hear the other voice. I love the sound of it. It’s making me think of images of a very sexy and mysterious woman. I’ve never fallen in love with someone’s voice before but I think I am about to.

“Of ‘course.” She says making me want to see her face. I need to see the shape of the lips making this sound. I need to see her eyes and I want to talk to her so I can hear that voce over and over.

I start walking in the direction of the voice. I’m in Freddie’s bedroom all I need to do is get out of this room, turn right, walk down the hallway and then I’ll be in the same room as the woman with this intriguing voice.

“Where are you going dude? Are you leaving already? The game hasn’t even started yet.” Freddie says when he finds me sanding in his doorway.

“Huh?” I ask confused a little. I lost myself a little there. All I want to do is see the person with this voice that has awakened this feeling in me. Her voice is making me wish I had my sketchbook with me. I always have it with me but because I haven’t had any inspiration I left it at home.

 I need a paper and pencil I need to capture what I’m feeling right now. I don’t want to lose it; I can’t remember the last time I felt like this. I don’t even know if I have. I feel like I can create anything right now, I feel like rushing into the street and screaming like a mad man. I feel like sitting still and staring at nothing. I feel like doing everything and nothing at all.

“Where are you going?” Freddie repeats walking into his room leaving me at the door. “The game is about to start.” He says and I walk back to the chair I was sitting in.

“I… Who’s in there with your mother?” I ask when my brain cells finally start working.

“She’s with the girl that does her hair.” He says dismissively.

“Do you know her?” I ask looking at him impatiently. He’s staring at the TV screen and not at me. I need him to look at me so he can tell me all the information on this girl. I take a deep breath to calm down. I don’t know Freddie like that I can’t freak out on him. He’ll tell me what I need to know.

“Not really I just know her through my moms.” He says not paying any attention to me. He’s more interested in the game. I could care less about the game. I want to meet this girl and take her home with me, so I can paint her. And do other things to her.  

“Do you know her name?” I ask and he takes a sip of his bear ignoring me.

“The game is starting.” He says pointing at the screen. He looks at me smiling, excited about what’s on the screen.

“Her name?” I say as politely and calmly as possible.

“Oh yeah! Adira.” He says finally.

“Do you have a piece of paper and pencil I can use?” I ask as he sits back comfortably looking at the TV.

“Behind you.” H says pointing to a desk behind me. I get up to look for what I need. “I don’t think I have a pencil though.” He says looking at me. I find a piece of paper and a blue pen. I sit back down and start to sketch. I let my mind conjure up the images I want. I let it guide me in creating the woman with the beautiful voice.

I sit back and let the emotions I am feeling take me over. I draw the mouth that creates the sound. Imagine what it be like to see them move. I take my time carving the out. Her name echoes over and over in my mind. Adira… It echoes pushing me to put her image on paper.

 I move to her nose leaving her mouth half finished; her eyes are the easiest part to put on paper. The image of them comes to me clear as day. The eyes staring at me in my mind have life in them, they have curiosity. They are filled with light but at the same time there is a void in them.

I don’t know why but they show me that she is in need of healing. I haven’t seen her but I know that this girl needs more light in her life. Maybe it’s the drawl in her voice. They make her sound like she’s hiding. She uses her drawl to calm herself. To calm the chaos that is in her heart and mind.  

“Wow man, that is amazing. When you said you were an artist I didn’t think you meant you were that good.” Freddie says breaking me out of my hallucination. I look at him waiting for any recognition of the person I just drew. Did I get the girl with the voice right? Is the image I saw in my head the right one?

“Thanks man.” I say looking at him staring at the sketch. He doesn’t say anything beyond that. I feel disappointment settle in my heart. I was hoping I got her likeness right, but I didn’t  

I get up to leave and he looks at me in surprise.

“Are you leaving?” He says looking at me disappointed.

“Yeah. I think I should get home. Thank you for having me, I wish I could stay longer but I’m going to go.”  I say and he gets up.

“We should hang out again. Maybe we can do something more entertaining.” He says looking around sad.

“I had fun man.” I say touching his shoulder lightly. I feel bad for making him feel like he bored me. This has nothing to do with him and everything to do with me the lady with the voice.  “And we are definitely getting together very soon.” I say and that seems to appease him.

“Yes, we should meet soon.” He says smiling.

“Great.” I say getting out of his bedroom, turn right and then down the hall. I hold my breath as I walk into the TV room where they are. The first thing I see is her profile; she has her head bent down looking at Freddie’s mom’s head. She has hands in the lady’s hair and they are moving fast, platting upward and then downward.

 She looks in my direction the moment I walk into the room. I am taken aback at the first glimpse of her face. She is nothing like my mind conjured up. This girl is breathtaking. I drew her nowhere near her likeness. I curse myself for not doing her beauty any justice.

 She looks back down at her hands as soon as I walk next to her. I almost groan in pain at her action. I want her to look at me forever.

“Simon is leaving mom.” Freddie says breaking the spell I’m under yet again.

“Oh, okay. Thank you for visiting with my Freddie.” His mother says and I am forced to stop looking at Adira and at her.   

“Thank you so much for being so gracious with your home.” I say smiling at her. I steal a quick glance at Adira but she’s not looking at me. She’s concentrating on her work. And I’m crushed. I wish she would look at me.

“I do hope you visit again, maybe we can have dinner next time.” Freddie’s mom says smiling at me

“That sounds lovely.” I say smiling at her. I say my goodbyes, look at Adira one last time and then I leave.

I need to get home and paint her. She is beautiful beyond words.