In Denial

Raïna walked away, blabbering about how happy she was to have been promoted before she let the silence fill in. She was staring at the red envelope in her hands with a gentle smile as she swung it left and right. It had his sent on it.

" Girls? " She suddenly interpellated them. They both turned their heads around and waited. " What do you think it feels like to see your mate for the first time? "

"Seriously, we were just off the topic and you brought it back. " Amy sneered, rolling her eyes. Leneay's eyes sparkled at the question.

"It must be the most beautiful thing in history. It's meeting your one and only, your forever. It must be magical, like in a fairy tale. Your eyes caught him, your body feeling the desire, ooooh no, I know the best moment, It'd be when you understand it's him. Just imagine the relief of not having to search anymore. I'm sure it's how mentioned in the books, the best moment of your life. "

Raïna cringed at how lovey-dovey it all seemed, but she understood where Leneay came from. It would be incredible knowing someone would always be there.

"And you Amy, what do you think it would be like? " Leneay asked. Amy sighed before speaking up:

"It's probably all cute and loving when you meet but what's the after, huh? Those books you talk about are a century old when we still lived in packs. That's when it was easy: you met them, you married them, and lived happily ever after. But what now? We don't live in packs anymore, would you drop everything to go with the first man that gave you butterflies in the tummy when your eyes caught each other in the mall? Who in their right mind would do that? "

"That's why you don't believe in mates? " Leneay asked in a low voice, trying to be careful.

" I never said I didn't believe in them. For sure they exist, but what are the chances of finding that one person in 7 billion others?! And what if they aren't what you want them to be? What then? " She asked walking furiously fast toward the exit, up the stairs to the dorms.

"You wouldn't have any choice but to suck it up or worse, you could do the absolute worst, reject them which would be killing half of you. I just don't like this whole mate thing, that's why I don't want mine, end of discussion. " she opened room 511 with her key and pushed the door open.

Leneay gave up and went to change into her pajamas. Raïna walked over to the window and looked outside. "but still, it must be great just knowing that one person if you meet them, will love you. "

" I know right?! " Responded Leneay,

"Please, feels more like a prison to me. " retorted Amy.

She laughed at how different her friends were, and opened the window, readying herself to jump from it.

"See you later. "

"Bye, Have a good night! "

" Hurry up and shut the window. It's getting cold here. "

She let herself fall and didn't transform. She landed heavily on her feet and felt a sharp pain shoot through her legs. " I'm never doing this again. " She said falling on her butt.

She looked up to the window she had just fallen from and sadly smile while tears prickled her eyes. "It'd be great to have the choice", she whispered.

" How come? " Akyl asked Stephen. The latter sighed heavily and repeated the answer, for what seemed like the hundredth time. " I do not know. "

"But why now? " He grunted. " There must be a variable that I'm missing. Why the heck is it happening? "

"I do not know. " Stephen answered angrily. " Instead of torturing yourself over a meaningless event like this pathetic ceremony, which I continue to repeat, is not of your caliber, you should focus on the restructuring of this branch. "

Akyl eyed his aid from the side and took his head in his hands. " That's what I always tell you to be cautious of. " He let out in a breath.

" Well, it's hard when I see you in such a state. "

" Try. " he harshly responded. " I have never shown affection publicly. Whatever happened there wasn't normal. "

"Why fuss over it then? It's not as if you will ever see her again. She will only be a pawn in your plan. " Akyl looked at Stephen shockingly, asking himself if he ever had feelings.

"Sometimes you are hard to deal with." Akyl blurted out. " I just wished I knew why her, and why now. But it won't affect me at all, don't worry. "

" Are you sure you don't even want to verify? It would be done and you could get over it sooner to concentrate. " Stephen offered. He turned his head sideways and waited.

"What would it do, huh? It wouldn't change a damn thing. I would still be the master, she would still be a simple captain. She would continue her life, I would continue mine. End of the story. " Stephen looked at him sadly. Nothing was false, but it still felt wrong.

"Furthermore, there's nothing to verify. I'm sure it's her and I'm pretty sure she knows it too, who I am, deep inside." He got up from his chair and Stephen handed him the coat which he put on hurriedly.

"You're right, I shouldn't even be thinking of that, nothing will ever happen. Nothing can happen, they made sure of that. " He whispered the end to himself. Memories of her came as if to mock him, but he pressed them away and promptly walked out of his office toward the basement. 

Stephen stood there, this time he didn't follow him downstairs as always. Stephen always had a hard time understanding emotions, but he got the hint this time. The door shutting just before his face was pretty obvious.

He wondered what it was like, to have your mate denied from you. But he would never know, his died a long time ago already.