Alone and love my self

I donot know where am going actually. But the thing l know is that l dont want to go back home. Tears were still running down from my eyes. My mum has never laid her finger on me. o have been doing things and she would just scold me .At times she would ignore them too.But this time she choose to hit me.Was l really that wrong !.ls following your heart a crime! And it's a no for me.So this got me really sad and too much for me to handle.

I drove the car far away from home.And it will be a lie to say that l even knows the route.l drove for almost two hours and  I finally stopped at a motel where l  checked in.lts in a remote area and l actually found it suitable for me to hide for a while. I will spend the nights here for days, a week or may months l don't know. Just like l wanted.A place far away from home.l got my bag only with me. I went to the room l was given.

I opened it and it isn't that big like my luxurious room back home but it's enough for me as of now. It's not like l have business to do in it anyway.lts just me and my sorrows.

My tears couldn't stop. I only managed to stop them infront of the receptionist of this motel. I didn't want to be embrassed  infront of people. To look pathetic isn't on my list of things.

To be honest l dont know whether these tears are for the slap my mum gave me and her words or it's for my ex boyfriend's insults. Or the slap my beastie gave me! All l know is that am hurt for now. Don't even know whether it's me who hurt myself or the people close to me.

I cried for a while once l was alone in the room.My phone started ringing.l took a glance at a caller and the name sweet dad appeared before my eyes. I just easily canceled the call and shut my phone down.What else did they want? To slap me more.Hell no am not gonna get that again.

Since l didn't have anything to organise in the room ,l went in the bathroom and cleaned my already swollen face with red eyes now.

After l got my bag and stormed out of the room.l went to the receptionist and ask her about the nearby boutique or a mall .l needed shopping badly since l run away with only my hand bag.

The receptionist quickly directed  me to a nearby small town saying that there isn't any mall around.The town isn't far away from the motel.lt was in the eastern side nowonder l didn't see when l came here..l didn't want to get my car out from the parking lot so l took a quick taxi there.Although the place is remote,it seems that they don't suffer transport means.The taxis are available.Could it be that the motel bring alot of people ? 

The taxi soon stopped somewhere in the town.l immediately came into contact with a relatively  smaller supermarket.There is also a boutique besides it.l got out of the taxi after l told the driver to wait for me.  I got everything l wanted .Clothes from that boutique and other necessities.Since the world is against me because of love l choose to be alone and love my self.l had even planned to confess my feeling to Mr.Gavin today but it didn't happen.l didn't want him to see me in that dispeakable state l was in .That's why l just run away at the awareness of him being near.And at home l was just slapped.l smiled bitterly at myself on my way to the taxi.l didn't think that things will turn out that way.

The driver is  a good man.He came and took my shopping bags and helped me put them in the car.l was greatful to him.They wasn't that heavy because l did light shopping but l was perhaps exhausted because of what happened today.l thanked him and l sat in the car resting me head on the back of the chair.

Ma’am we are here.l had the driver say to me.Was l sleeping already! I quickly snapped my eyes open realising that we are back at the motel.l thanked the driver again and got out of the car.He again offered to take my bags to the entrance of the motel.Before l could even say yes or no he was already Infront of me with the bags walking in big strides.l had no option rather than following him.

Here Ma'am we are not allowed to cross here.He said with a smile while handling me the shopping bags.Thank you so  much.l replied.lts nothing Ma'am l just appreciate the money you gave me.This is my card incase you need my service again.He handed me the card. 

Oh sure l will definitely contact you .l took the card from him and looked at it.Derrick Lupid is his name.l nodded at him with a smile and l entered the motel.

Having reached my room ,l went threw all the shopping bags on the bed and went to the bathroom..l think l do even smell like a rotten rat.l didn't have a bath for the entire day since l was in circles still confused of how to break up with my ex boyfriend.

I quickly stripped my dirt clothes off and hit the shower.Perhaps this is what l needed.

The warm water that l run for my self did alot to calm my nerves.l felt alot better after the bath.l left the bathroom and sat on the dressing mirror.l carefully combed my long black silk hair into a virgin Mary way.l then put the lotion onto my skin.l changed into a yellow blouse with pink flowers and it's accompained grey shorts afterwards.

I was in a daze when l was done with everything.First of all l didn't want to turn on my phone for fear that my parents will beg me to go back home.And also Edinna or Eric might call to scold me.But the same time l was too bored to be alone.l had stopped crying.Yes l didn't want it anymore since it won't help me in anyway.

The waitress knocked on the door for my dinner.l didn't eat lunch and l don't blame my stomach when it grumbled at the sight and aroma of food.l dug into it like my entire life depended on it.