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Clara
The sky is low, heavy like my tired eyelids. A fine rain traces gray veins on the windows of the French door, blurring the view of the impeccably manicured garden that I myself planted over the years. Every flowerbed, every bush has a story. Hours spent digging, watering, shaping… to make this house a cocoon. My cocoon.
Nothing is left to chance here. Not the cushions rigorously aligned on the pearl-gray sofa, not the white linen curtains I wash every fortnight, not even the scent of cinnamon and smoked wood lingering in the air since I relit the candle near the fireplace. Everything here speaks of me. Of us. At least, that's what I believed.
I glance at the wall clock. 6:47 PM. Éric is late. Again. The little second hand seems to dance with a mocking grin. I've stopped asking him questions. I know the answers: "a meeting that ran late," "the ring road was jammed," "a colleague in trouble." Always something. Always a reason. And yet… this slow drift between us, I feel it, like you feel a tide rising without even hearing it.
I get up for the fourth time in ten minutes, go get a glass of water that I don't drink, then come back to the living room where everything seems frozen. Even time. Even me.
Then, the sound of an engine in the driveway. My heart skips a beat.
I approach the window. It's him. His car. I smile, despite myself. An old reflex of a woman in love, conditioned. But very quickly, that smile fades. He's not alone.
I freeze, my hand still on the curtain.
A silhouette gets out of the vehicle. Slender. Feminine. I squint. It's dark, the rain blurs the view. But I can make out her gestures. Slow. Precise. Calculated.
And then, he walks around the hood to open the car door for her.
Éric never opens the car door for me.
She gets out, pulls out a rolling suitcase. Not some old, shabby bag, no. A new, elegant model, camel leather. She adjusts it with a graceful hand gesture. Then she lifts her head.
I finally see her clearly.
She is… superb. Too much so. The kind of beauty that disturbs, that enters a room and immediately draws all eyes. She has that kind of perfect skin that no rain seems able to tarnish. Her face is made up just enough. Her brown hair waves indolently over her shoulders. She doesn't seem tired, or even out of place. On the contrary, she seems perfectly in her place, as if she knew she was going to enter here. As if she had prepared for this moment.
I slowly step back from the curtain. A shiver runs through me. Not from cold. From unease.
The door opens abruptly. The damp air rushes into the entrance.
— Honey! I'm here!
His voice is louder than usual. Forced. He wants to sound natural, relaxed. He fails.
I approach, my footsteps echoing on the too-silent parquet floor. My gaze slides over her. She observes everything. The walls, the paintings, the soft lighting… and me.
— Clara, meet Jade, says Éric, placing a hand on her shoulder.
That hand… it lingers a second too long. Jade. The name clicks softly between his teeth. Almost tenderly.
— Jade is… my cousin. On my mother's side. Distant, but family nonetheless, you see?
I don't say anything right away. My brain grapples with this information. A cousin? What cousin? He never mentioned her to me.
— I don't remember you ever telling me about her, I say, my tone calm but acidic.
He smiles. Too wide. Too fake.
— We reconnected recently. F******k, family research… She's going through a difficult time, she needed a place to land. I thought we could host her for a few days. She's family, after all.
He speaks quickly. His eyes avoid me.
She, on the other hand, stares at me. She extends her hand.
— Thank you for having me, Clara. It's really generous.
Her voice is soft, polite. But there's that note. That little something I can't quite name. Not provocation, no. Something more subtle. A way of testing my reaction. Of sizing me up.
I shake her hand. Firmly. Harder than I should. She doesn't flinch. Her gaze holds mine, without blinking.
She smiles at me. Not an embarrassed smile, nor a grateful one. A calm smile, almost amused.
I know that look. That look of a woman who knows what she's doing. Who enters a house knowing perfectly well what she's come for.
Éric bends down towards Jade's bag.
— I'll show her the guest room. Would you mind waiting for us in the living room?
I nod.
He disappears with her up the stairs.
I remain alone in the entrance hall.
And there, in this sudden silence, something cracks. Not a fear. An intuition.
She is not his cousin.
She is something else.
Something I can't yet say out loud.
But that I already feel biting under my skin.
I take refuge in the living room. Sit down, cross my arms. I stare at the fire in the fireplace, struggling to catch. The wood crackles faintly, like a distant breath.
The parquet creaks upstairs. Low voices. A burst of feminine laughter.
I close my eyes.
When they come back down, Éric comes and sits next to me. He places his hand on my knee. Automatic gesture. Empty.
— She'll stay a few days. Just long enough for her to settle a bit. She has no one left in the area. And it makes me happy to help her.
He looks at me, searches for my reaction.
I give him nothing. My face is frozen.
— Of course, I say simply. One doesn't refuse family.
Jade sits in the armchair opposite. She crosses her legs, straightens her back. She observes every corner of the room. A predator analyzing its new territory. She doesn't say it, but she's already at home. Or rather… she acts as if I were the guest.
Silence settles in.
Long. Thick. Uncomfortable.
She takes a sip of the tea she made for herself without asking. She smiles, recognizing the flavor.
— Cinnamon. I love it.
I look at Éric. He avoids my gaze.
And there, I understand.
Something is not right in this story.
An invisible door.
And on the other side… there is the truth.
And it's going to hurt.
ÉricShe stayed in the bathroom for a long time.The water flows beyond the door, like a distant reminder of reality, but here, in the room, everything seems suspended. The sheets still warm from Jade's body. The smell of her skin floating in the air. And me, sitting on the edge of the bed, bare-chested, still quivering.I look at my hands.They tremble slightly.It's not fatigue. It's greed. A lack that returns as soon as the act is over. A new, insidious, silent addiction. It's her. She consumes me. She draws me into a game where I lose every round, and yet, I want to play again.The door opens with a breath. A slight mist invades the room, followed by her body: Jade.Her body still damp, half-goddess, half-demon. Drops slide over her hips, her breasts, her stomach. She has tied a towel at her waist, but it covers nothing. On the contrary, it underlines. Accentuates. Drives crazy.Her hair falls in heavy strands around her face. She doesn't look at me right away. She advances. Depos
ÉricI knew it would happen.I knew it from the moment I left her, five days earlier, still trembling, still marked by her. It wasn't a flight, nor a deliverance. It was only a reprieve.Since then, everything has lost its taste.Coffee.Conversations, Clara's skin.Even the daylight.I wandered through my daily life like a ghost, promising myself I would hold on. But I was already lying. I was lying to everyone. Especially to myself.And last night, I cracked.Two words sent without thinking:"Where are you?"The answer fell like a guillotine blade."Still within reach of a mistake."Then an address.A discreet hotel, almost hidden in an anonymous alley, two metro stops from my place.Room 608.I didn't reply.I didn't confirm.And yet, tonight, I'm here.In front of this door.My hand suspended.My breath suspended.The world suspended.I knock. Once. Twice.And the door opens.She didn't ask any questions.More beautiful than in my memories.But it's not her beauty that overwhelms
ÉricThe office oppresses me.More than ever.Yet I came here to flee. Flee the bedroom. Flee Clara. Flee the memory of the previous night, of her voice soft as a verdict, of her measured breath in the dark. Flee above all Jade. Ironic sordidness: it's her I find again, as soon as I cross the threshold.Not in flesh. In spirit. In scent. In poison.Everything reminds me of Jade. Even here.The smell of coffee, usually reassuring, burns my throat. The noise of keyboards, distant calls, slamming doors… everything assaults me. My body is here, sitting, impeccable suit, tie well knotted. But inside, it's a desert.I think I've become a shell.An illusion of a man.Colleagues greet me, talk to me. I respond automatically. I smile sometimes. I've learned to pretend. I'm a good liar now. But my hands tremble a little when I sit down. And my stomach twists every time a phone vibrates.Because I'm waiting for a message.Hers.And because I dread it arriving.I imagine her, behind her screen, c
ÉricIt's almost four in the morning when I leave the hotel.The corridor is silent, covered in thick carpet, muffling my steps as if even the place was ashamed of me. The elevator descends slowly, too slowly. My reflection in the metal panels sends back a troubled image: red eyes, crumpled shirt, mouth marked by another's kisses. With a swipe of my sleeve, I try to erase what I've become. Pointless.The city sleeps.Lyon stretches in a spectral calm. The rare cars cross my path without stopping. The shop windows are dark. The trees tremble softly in the night wind. Dead leaves slide on the sidewalk like confessions you try to flee.I walk fast, hands in pockets, coat collar turned up. Not to warm myself. To hide.I didn't take a taxi. I don't want to go home too fast. I want to feel my legs burn, my heart pound under my ribs. I want to deserve some of the pain I should feel. But everything is confused. What I feel is something else. A damp torpor, a tension between shame and desire.
ÉricThe door to her room opens before I even knock.She knew.She was waiting for me, naked under a half-open black kimono, like a provocation. No useless words. No pretense. Her gaze pierces through me. I feel like I'm suffocating already, even before entering.I take a step.She slowly backs away, turns her back to me. The fabric barely slips over her shoulders, revealing the perfect curve of her back, her offered nape. She still doesn't speak. She doesn't need to. Everything, in her body, in her slowness, in her way of precisely ignoring me, calls to me.I close the door. There's only us. The air is warm, almost humid. A dim lamp casts a soft light on the unmade bed. A slight scent of black fig and incense hangs in the air. Intimate. Dangerous. As if this room were not a place, but a fault line.She stops at the foot of the bed, puts her glass on the low table, then turns to me. Slowly. She stares at me without blinking.— You came.— I don't know why.— Yes, you do.Her words are
ÉricI can't sleep.The silence in the bedroom is almost oppressive. You hear nothing, except Clara's steady breathing, lying beside me. Or maybe she's pretending. Clara has this way of retreating without a sound, of slipping away without shouting, but her absence is felt like a silent slap. The sheet between us becomes a wall. An invisible frontier. A barrier I haven't crossed for weeks. Since her.Jade.Always her.She haunts me. In my insomnia, in the corridors of my mind, in every vacant space of my body that Clara no longer touches. She's there, like a persistent echo. I close my eyes, and it's not memories of my marriage that come back. It's hers. Her laughs, her hands, her voice deep, slightly husky, that grain in her intonations that drills into my memory.I let her in, worse: I called her.And it all started eight months ago.In Lyon.A legal conference like so many others. Three days of flat presentations, unreadable PowerPoints, limp discussions on case law. I came out of o







