She impulsively stepped back, her grip tightened. “Don’t come any closer. Don’t give me a reason to hurt you.” Again he stepped closer and she stepped back in response, her heart missing a beat. “Please stop Sir, I beg of you.” The tears threatened but she held them at bay.
Hands in the air in mock surrender, he said. ”You should really put the bag down. I doubt chrysanthemum could hurt anyone.” He put his hands down and sent the one bearing his cigar to his mouth for another drag. “My parents would not appreciate you hurting me. I am an only child you see, very much loved.”How did he know she had chrysanthemums in her bag? “How did you…? How were yo…? How did you know I have only chrysanthemums in my bag?” Her voice helped her thoughts.“I didn’t know you had only chrysanthemums.” He drawled. “They possess such lovely smell. Makes you want to smile all day long for absolutely no reason at all.” It wasn’t a sarcastic comment, it was simply a statement. He knew of flowers.He had no idea she held only chrysanthemums and she threw the knowledge right at his feet. She had been tricked, how wonderful! Her breath slowed down but her heart was still erratic. “Why were you following me?” She lowered her ‘weapon’. “What is it that you want?” He was quiet again. “What do you want?”“I don’t suppose you could give me what I want.” Her breath hitched again as his free hand found his pocket. “I wasn’t following you, at least, not until you started running. Thought you saw something, I want to be safe too.”He was scared? But he was a… “But you are a man.”“Men die too.” He stated flatly.That was true. “Where are you headed so early in the morning?” She demanded. “Isn’t it too early to be going about, frightening people?”He stared. “I could ask the same of you.” Then he continued as though angry, “And why were you running?!”Beth face-palmed and sighed deeply, wearied. This simple morning was slowly wearing her out. She wished she was anywhere else but on the road to the hill, with a complete stranger. “You were walking behind me; naturally I thought the worst and ran. Then you ran after me, scaring me even further.” She threw her bag over her left shoulder. In between running for dear life and holding up a discussion, daylight slowly crept in.His face was nothing as she had imagined. For someone with a voice as deep and broken as his, his face did him no justice. It was calm and unnerving, a total opposite of his voice, which could be frightening if put into good use. There was no expression on his face, not even the anger she thought she heard. She couldn’t tell much from his expression and the light, but it definitely showed strength and struggle. And he had height – she stood small before him. He stared at her and she, at him. “It was never my intention to frighten you, but I did. I deeply apologize.”Okay! Misunderstanding cleared. Now she needed to get out of there, refusing still to trust him. “Alright. I suppose that settles things. I apologize for my thoughts.” Beth bowed slightly and waited for a reply, when nor was forthcoming, she started to walk away until his voice called out to her.Somehow, it was softer. “You never answered my question.”She turned. “What question?”He walked closer to her. A tad too close making Beth step back into the grass, tensed. This gentleman was totally oblivious to how nervous he made her. “Where are you going?”She relaxed a bit. “Uphill.” Her finger pointed in the direction. She reprimanded herself immediately. How could she tell someone she didn’t know of where she was headed? What if he really wanted to harm her? Still, something about him made her feel at ease, his height probably, or his commanding voice, or the aura that accompanied him. “Where are you going?” She returned.He only stared again. When Beth thought no reply was to be heard, she nodded and made to leave. “I don’t know.”His answer was totally unexpected. Who knew not where they were headed? “Then I suppose any road will take you there. Have a good day, Sir.” She bowed and started walking away and he started after her. Her heart skipped a beat. “Are you going uphill? Is that what you’ve decided?”He pulled another drag of his cigar, tossed the butt and crushed it underneath his boot. “Courtesy demands I ensure you arrive at your destination safely.” She stopped and he paused too. “The people need to be protected from you and your vocals.”“That is very much kind of you Sir, and I sincerely appreciate your kindness, but I assure you neither I, nor the people need your courtesy. And, I’d rather be alone on this day, someone dear to my heart awaits me.”“Your husband?”“I am unwed, Sir”“A lover?”“I have no such, Sir.”“The one you are promised to then?”“I am promised to no one. I own myself.” Stopping abruptly, Beth decided this has gone long enough. She was surprised she could hold the conversation so long. “Thank you for your courtesy and kindness but I would rather make this trip alone.” Waiting for his reply and getting neither an acceptance nor rebuttal, she bowed. “I’ll take my leave.”His voice stopped her yet again. “Who are you? I don’t think I’ve had the pleasure to make your acquaintance.”She turned slightly again, worried. Why was he delaying her? Was it some sort of tactic? “I am a young woman who has prior engagements she wishes to attend to. Who are you, Sir?”He made a sound. His eyes perused her and then came the surprise. “You don’t know who I am?” Beth kept her eyes on him and his surprise grew. “You really do not know.” He repeated, more to himself than her.Who was he? “Am I obligated to?” She murmured. Faraway in the eastern horizon, the sun rose with a signal of pale yellow light, illuminating the blue sky. Beth bowed again to the gentleman. “I didn’t know of the obligation to know who you are, so I apologize.” Of course, she was insincere. “And I thank you for your consideration to see me safely to my destination but I would politely decline and appreciate it if you would delay me no further. I wish you good luck and safety to wherever it is you finally decide to go. Good day Sir.” Beth turned, picked up her skirt and ran uphill, leaving him as she realized he wasn’t going to offer any answer to her apology or gratitude.Again came his voice, ringing out, louder. “Will it be possible I see you after today?”She yelled back to him. “I don’t suppose so.” And God knew she wanted far away from him as possible. In the time they were together, he had frightened, entertained, annoyed and scared her. She wished never to see such an egocentric man, be it a Lord, or otherwise.She ran nonstop, grasping at the little air her lungs could take in, pushing herself forth to gain more grounds. Her bag rode on her hip and she struggled not to ruin the flowers anymore than it has been, for minutes ago, it was her most trusted ally.Higher ground! She needed to get to a much higher ground. No, she needed to find the perfect spot, to watch the sun rise, the right place. Pushing herself even more, she ran with all her might, until finally, she found the highest spot. She was out of breath; but it was perfect.And so was the sun rise.She knew he truly cared for her too. Why would he not tell her he loved her? He had cried when he came to know of their child. He protected her from the scorn of the ton and stayed from her when he thought she wanted freedom from him. To Beth, these were all forms of love. Why then would he then not tell her he loved her? His gaze lifted and their eyes locked. "If I do," he whispered. "I'm afraid I would end up losing you." Her heart slammed, filling once more with love for him. she was absolutely breathless now. She never thought she could love him more. He was broken, broken by the tragedy of his parents. Scared that if he admitted aloud to loving her, she would be lost. But Beth knew better, she knew she would not be, she could never love another nor leave him. She loved the Duke of Carlisle and nothing could change it. He was the one she loved. She saw his fear, that he would become like his father, who gave up love to protect his power and title, leaving behind another importa
* * *Beth gasped as Charles's lips took hers, the familiar sensation sending shivers over her body and a known heat to the core of her being. Her eyes closed. He brushed his mouth back and forth against hers as his hands came to her cheeks. Her nostrils tinged. Surprisingly, he smelt like flowers and tasted like the best sunrise.The pebbles dropped and she clasped his shoulders, pulling closer. The pressure increased. His hand held the back of her head as he fought to pry her lips open. She gave in, the kiss was one of hunger and need and longing. He kissed her as if he had sworn his life to it, never wanting to let go.But when air failed her and she protested. He released her mouth.Beth was reeling from the pressure of the kiss and Charles shared her sentiment. His breathing complimented hers as her lungs fought for enough air to keep her alive, while her head fought for thoughts to keep her sane and in place."Darling?" Charles asked as soon as he could breathe naturally.It had
April 1827The rain had finally given up the challenge and let up to a drizzle, but not before creating obstacles in the form of puddles and broken branches, and hiding the moon from sight. In a bid to destroy, the wind had brought down branches and uprooted trees. The workers and the men who catered to the trees would be quite preoccupied in the days to come.The Carlisle coach pulled through, hurtling down the road at the request of its master, bringing itself home. It struggled against the rocks and branches flung about. In the sky, the flashing lightning and cracking thunder gave a promise of the rain's return. It would again storm terrifically, it said.Albert properly held the flowers picked from Torrence Hall when they had made a brief stop, and the cigars Mr. Danbury had given him at Lanhandron for his Lord. Although he had refused, many times, the man did not adhere to him. Did he think there was another merchant who they went to?Charles held freely onto the safety strap as
***Charles had finished with his work and was going to his room, walking the dark halls alone. As soon as Albert had finished attending to him, assisting him change his clothes and putting out his documents in his study, he had sent the man away, needing to remain with his ledgers and work without the hovering presence of an overzealous servant.Over the weeks after his return, he had been sitting with his documents, checking and ascertaining to a fault the works of his solicitors and confirming the progress of his estates.Beth and the builders had, to a large extent, established an edifice and he couldn't be more proud of her. The materials needed for the windows and the doors had already been purchased. On a later day, he would pay the site a visit, but he knew there was nothing to worry about.The bank statements and cheques his solicitors had sent were beautiful. The farms were progressing, the lands had been cleared and prepared for planting. The other estates had been renovate
Beth searched for his emotion, searching to see if he truly was not angry. He wasn't. She turned her away, letting her eyes wander around. The sky was dark and save for the fire, it was all darkness. The wind blew, whispering to the fire, troubling it, and against her skin, causing goosebumps to rise. She sighed. It was warmer at the foot of the hill.How were they on the hill?!"We were standing by the foot of the hill." She mumbled to herself.Eric heard her. "Now, we are here, atop it. Isn't life wonderful?"It was. Wonderful and unpredictable. The grim feeling rose again, and Beth felt uncertain about the future, but she was almost sure of the disaster waiting to happen."Eric, we should not be here." She held his wrist. "This hill_"He cut her off. "What about the hill?" When his smile surfaced, it was one of melancholia. Beth had the silent feeling that he knew of what was to come but would not prevent it. Was he not afraid of it? Was he not scared for the future?If he was not,
"Beth. Beth!" Someone was whispering, calling out to her. The voice was close by, as though the caller was by her side, but also like they were afar off. It was a familiar voice. Beth stirred in her sleep, refusing to pay attention to the call, choosing rather to dive deeper into the world of sweet subconsciousness and unawareness."Bethany wake up, it's morning." The voice called again. She turned, pulling the covers higher as she allowed the darkness continuous hold on her tighten. The comfortable sleep carried her and she liked it. She enjoyed it.But the familiar voice would not relent. "Wake up, sister." It called again. She turned away from it, drowning it out. The bed covers wrapped perfectly around her, helping her remain where she was, far from the voice.Again, it called. "Wake up!!!" The caller shook her, forcing her to regain consciousness. She refused but he was as stubborn as her, finally she gave in. Annoyed enough, Beth forced her eyes open.The room was dark at first,
***Beth stayed with Lady Marjorie who was as excited as a church mouse and the group, laughing gaily at the jokes of Lord Witte. When it broke, she walked with Peter Sinclair, Lord Witte's son-in-law, before excusing herself, telling that her feet were tired and she needed to sit. She walked away to the fountain and sat herself down.The water was beautiful and golden due to the lamps set up about the place. It beckoned and she answered. Her fingers played lightly over the surface of the water and her contact with it caused ripples, distorted and obedient to the slow movement. The lines formed and swept silently by, but before they could scatter she would create yet another set of lines. It was a nonsensical act but it was fun for her, at least for the moment.The Willowbrook sisters had scared her with their words but it had made her receive a promise from Charles, a promise that everyday made life beautiful. Her words to their mother had been true. There was nothing to forgive. The
Beth shook her head. "No." She giggled. "Not too long ago, they saw me as a seductress and a thief. Soon they would see me as Bethany, and even if they don't, I am satisfied with being Lady Carlisle, after all Lord Carlisle is my husband, is he not? I would no more care for how people see me, it is their choice but I would demand my honour, it is my right."She was different. She was bolder. What had happened to the timid woman who was angry at the too quick a marriage and the new home she was to own and manage? The same who would always turn her away at every visit? Marjorie liked this woman. She was good for Charles. She was good for the Duchy. She was good for herself. Like this, she could face society and win even though many people still held contempt against her.She was brave."You are braver than I am and I consider myself quite brave. Marrying John was one of the greatest joys of my life, but there were days I was forced to regret it."The same people who bowed to her now, se
***Marjorie turned her head at every approaching carriage, hoping it to be the one from Carlisle Crest. They had not promised to be in attendance but she hoped they would, seeing as they had not rejected the invitation either. She wanted them to be more aligned with the ton and her ways, even if just a little bit. It was alright to have one's dealings, but society had some rules and breaking so many of them l might lead to not being accepted or worse invited to its norms and functions ever again. She knew Charles didn't care for societal rules but she did, and perhaps Beth might too and it would be cruel to steal it from the young woman.Mrs. Blackwell, Jacob Blackwell's new and older wife, waved to her and she waved in return. They did not run in the same circle but she was a nice woman who, like her, had defiled society and married the man she loved. When Mrs. Blackwell invited her in with a gesture, she refused and gesticulated back, saying she would be in the open area in a matte