Broken

*JAMIRA*

“You gotta be kidding me, you really about to go out with your hoe ass friends?!”

“My friends aren’t hoes, Chris!” “Besides, it’s my fucking birthday, and if it really mattered, you would’ve planned something for us!”

“All they do is pop pills and pussy!” “Why the fuck would you want to be around them?!” “You got a man!” “I’m here!”

Just as I was about to respond, my phone rang. I looked and saw it was my best friend, Ayana. Chris hated her with every fiber of his being. The reason for their tension stems from the way she felt Chris came and “interfered” with our friendship. Since we’ve been together, I hadn’t really had much time to spend with her. So you can imagine how excited she was that I was finally getting a chance to hang with her after all this time.

“Hello?”

“Girl are you ready yet?”

“Not yet, but I’m trying.”

She must have sensed the unease in my voice because what came next told me she knew exactly what was going on.

“I swear Mira if Chris upset you on your day I’m going to come over there and beat his ass myself.”

“No I’m good. He just doesn’t want me out late.”

Don’t ask me why I lied. I just don’t want anything to ruin my night. For once I need to be able to breathe.

“Fuck him. Hurry up and get ready so we can shake some ass. I’ll be there soon.”

For some reason that caused a slight smile to appear on my face and gave me just the ammunition I needed to keep getting ready and see the night through. I needed this. It’s my 27th birthday after all.

“Ok girl see you soon.”

After I hung up I went to go finish getting ready while Chris watched, eyes dark with agitation as he rolled another blunt. I hated that he smoked so much. He didn’t always smoke. And he wasn’t always so overbearing either. It seems like after the death of his brother that’s all he did. Maybe it was his way of coping or maybe he was stressed. Either way since that day he just changed. I’ve tried talking to him, going places with him, even fucking him more. He wasn’t even trying to do that. I know these things take time but all he ever wanted was for me to stay in the house while he either smoked or went out with his boys. Well not tonight. Tonight is my night and grief aside I’m going to enjoy it.

I walked out the room in a short black dress that hugged my body exposing every curve and dip of my body. It stopped at the middle of my thighs showing a portion of the tattoo that resides on my right thigh. I put on my gold heels that strap up the leg with my gold necklace and hoop earrings that paired well with my deep chocolate skin. My hair was curled loosely in its asymmetrical bob parted on the side enhancing my features. My makeup was a light natural beat heavy on the sexy. Just enough to turn heads. I grabbed my gold clutch out the closet put on some perfume and I was ready to go.

I managed to catch Chris’ facial expression on his smooth brown skin as I walked to the living room to wait for Ayana to arrive. It was like he wanted to say something possibly genuine but chose otherwise.

He sat on the loveseat next to the couch as if he was studying my moves. Then he broke the silence with his nagging yet again.

“So you can get dressed up for them, but you ain’t never looked like that for me”, he said voice cold as winter.

“Chris don’t start. We both know you don’t go anywhere with me anymore.” “All you ever do is smoke or chill with your boys”, I retorted.

“I don’t know why you want to be around Ayana, it ain’t like she wants to see you happy.” “That bitch can’t keep a man and don’t want you to have one either.”

I can’t lie that did hurt. And deep down had it not been my birthday it might’ve worked and I would’ve stayed with him. That’s just how much influence I let him have over me. I know… pathetic. I honestly just wanted to believe that this was just a phase and I’d wake up and he’d be back to normal. So far that day hadn’t come.

“Watch your mouth! Besides you’re one to talk you haven’t cared about my happiness for months now!”

“Man whatever”, he said exhaling the smoke from his mouth.

As if the universe knew I needed a way out there was a knock on the door. I opened the door and was elated to see Ayana’s face. Relief came over me as I walked out the door. I made sure not to leave room for either of them to make contact. That would’ve been another issue I didn’t need.