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Chapter 21
owlonmywristHey guys - Sorry this post is a day late. Had a horrible migraine yesterday. Back in business today.
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Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 22
Oh…shit… This was NOT the plan. Even when we were planning on telling our family, Matt was not going to be the first one to know. He’s way too overprotective. Even the guys that he’s known about that I’ve dated have caused him to freak the fuck out. My parents are super nice to any boyfriends because my brother gives them the third degree. You ever heard that country song “Cleaning this Gun?” Yeah, that’s mild compared to Matt. And I’ve heard bits and pieces of some of the shit that he and Ashton used to get up to when it came to girls. They never had to find girlfriends, girls literally threw themselves at them. Not always girls that were available for the taking. It caused quite a bit of draw in high school and college. So Matt finding out that I’m with Ashton on his own, especially by catching us having sex…This is really not good. “Matt!” I scream at the same time Ashton cries out “Oh, fuck!” He tries to pull up the sheets to cover both of us, but that will only pul
Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 23
I walk down the sidewalk, my mask on and sunglasses on, making it so that no one can see me crying. I had gotten in touch with Kora and she was getting dressed and then would be on her way in from Hempsted. But, it would take her about an hour to get here. I had a lot of time to kill and way to much to think about. I tell Kora to find me at my spot in Central Park. It’s the overlook rock, about 10 minutes from our apartment. It’s this large rock that looks over a pond on the southern corner of the park. There are usually all kinds of animals and people around and it’s great for sketching and losing myself in it. Unfortunately, I didn’t bring anything with me. I usually have a sketchbook or a notebook in my purse, but I’d filled it and hadn’t really felt pressed to get a new one because…well, I haven’t been going out often. On the way to the park, I stop at a bodega and grab something to eat and drink, as well as a notebook and some colored pencils. I have a few pencil s
Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 24
Come September classes have started again, though everything is online now. Even though we did some of this at the end of the semester, it’s weird to not go to school at all. I don’t quite know how to deal with it. Thank God that I have Kora here, because if I didn’t, I wouldn’t have any social interaction with anyone. This semester, I have a supervisory seminar. That’s where everyone that Ship supervises gets together to describe their current projects, any issues that they’re having with their art, and get feedback, not only from Ship, but also from other peers. I’ve sat in on a supervisory seminar before with Ship. Just one or two classes, because Ship thought that I had done something worthy of the older students’ attention. I had loved it, happily joining in on the conversation and showing off my pieces. Now, though, I tended to remain quiet unless specifically called on. I was definitely quieter than before, my responses a lot more thoughtful. And I never gave unsol
Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 25
There’s a light dusting of snow on the ground when I pull up to my parents’ house on Christmas Eve. I’ve waited until the last possible minute for me to go home because of having to face Matt. I’m ready to talk, ready to forgive him and try to move on. But that doesn’t meant that I actually want to do it. I know that it’s going to be a hard conversation, on that neither of us is going to enjoy, and I’m not looking forward to it. But…it’s been six months and it’s time we clear the air. The second that I pull into my parents’ driveway, they are running out the door to hug me. “Wait!” I say, holding my hands out to stop them. “Don’t you want me to quarantine? Should you be hugging me?” “You and Kora haven’t been around anyone other than your trips to the grocery store. You don’t have symptoms. And we miss you!” Dad exclaims, wrapping his arms around me. Mom hugs me from the other side and I’m enfolded in both of their arms at the same time. And honestly, I don’t have the
Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 26
Chapter 26 I have a month off from school for the winter semester, so I decide to spend three weeks at home with my family. I’ve missed them so much and I want to spend as much time with them as I can. It’s great to be home where I feel like I’m being taken care of by my family. We play board and card games, make all kinds of food and messes in the kitchen, watch loads of trash TV, and just…be together. It’s not the same between Matt and me. I don’t think that it ever will be. He said some things that can’t be unsaid and the feelings that those words caused within me were pretty big. I don’t know that we’ll ever get over it, but we will move on. And that’ll be enough. Ericka and Jamal come over a few times. They are my parents’ best friends. They are like a second set of parents to me and Matt. But I will literally see Ashton in every look that they give me. He has his mother’s nose. His father’s smile. His mother’s way of pausing before he tells a joke. His father’
Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 27
For the next month, I’m focused on getting back into the swing of the semester. The nice part is that I’m nearly done with all of my gen eds. The only ones that I have left are ones that can also count towards my major. Which means for the first time in my college career, all I’m focused on is art. Not necessarily my kind of art, but art all the same. I also get back to jogging like I was before. I didn’t get to do it as much in Ohio. The snow was too deep, people weren’t really on the streets, so snow plows weren’t running and sidewalks weren’t cleaned. I went to the gym a few times, but it wasn’t the same. I mean, I love the exercise part of jogging, but the biggest thing that I loved, that I craved, was being outdoors. It cleared my head and helped me to forget. Forget the pain. Forget the betrayal. Forget…everything. Everything that happened while I was with Ashton over quarantine. Being with my family had made it easier to forget. Making up with Matt made it eas
Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 28
I continue to get flowers everyday. Always a Gerbera daisy with some other flower. A sunflower to remind me of the day that we stopped on a road trip back from a cabin our families rented and went traipsing through a sunflower field. A rose to remind me of the bouquet he gave me on my high school graduation day. A lily to remind me of the time he took the blame for when I broke my mom’s favorite crystal lily. Each day a different flower and a different memory. And with every memory, he told me how much he missed something about me. At first it was my smile. Then it was my eyes. My laugh. My compassion. On Sunday, he sent me another full bouquet of Gerbera daisies. At first, I had given everything to Kora to get rid of. After the third day, I just gave her the notes that came with them after reading them. But by the end of the week, I was keeping them. And my wonderful friend, Kora, had kept them all instead of getting rid of them. She said that she knew that I would
Love in the Time of Quarantine Chapter 29
It’s the day of my opening and I’m a nervous fucking wreck. I barely slept the night before and I feel like a zombie right now. Finally, at 4 am, I decide to just get out of bed and get the day going. Ship told me to text him the second that I was ready for breakfast this morning, no matter what time it was. He would then tell me if I was insane or if I was being a normal first time exhibitor. I’ve kind of got the feeling that he’s as nervous as I am. I go for a run. Yes, it’s 4 am, but there’s still plenty of people out on the street. Quarantine is still a thing, but New York has decided that it’s time to get on with our lives. I feel comfortable running out here as long as I stick to the busier and more well lighted areas. In an attempt to exhaust myself, I run for an entire hour, hoping that I’ll come home and pass out on the couch. No such luck. So, I decide that I’m going to take a long, leisurely bath, shaving, exfoliating, and soaking in the tub. But I can’t rela
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