Love in the Time of Quarantine

Restaurants? Closed. Parks? Empty. Streets? Deserted. The world just suddenly stopped. The coronavirus (COVID-19) began in Wuhan, China, showing up in late December 2019. It quickly spread throughout the globe, causing death, financial disaster, job loss, and family upheaval. There isn’t a part of our lives that hasn’t been affected by COVID-19. As of today, February 24, 2022, there have been over 431 million worldwide deaths with new cases occurring every day. For many, we have lost loved ones. Some were stranded in other countries with no way to get home for weeks or months. Most of us were unable to see family or friends who lived out of our immediate bubble for nearly a year. The effect of quarantine on our mental health, learning, work, and relationships cannot be undersold. It brought Tiger King, sourdough bread making, so much Zoom, mass pet adoptions, and TikTok dance challenges. Working from home took on a new meaning while you tried to juggle children loggin

Ash decides he’d rather stay in, so I start working on dinner. I’m making his favorite—my mom’s lasagna.“I’m gonna go shower. Public transport just makes you feel all grimy,” he says, uncorking a bottle of red wine. “Don’t drink that until I get out! It’s gotta breathe.”“Yes, sir!” I snap him a salute before turning back to the meat cooking on the stove.“Mmmm. I could get used to that kind of obedience from you.” As he walks past, he smacks my ass with the towel in his hand.“Asshole!” I shout after his laughing form as he disappears into Kora’s room.Over the next fifteen minutes, while I hear the water running in the shower, I brown the meat, make the sauce, and layer the lasagna in the dish. I’ve just slid it into the oven when I hear Ashton call my name.“What?” I yell, setting the timer on my phone.I hear a muffled response—something about owls?“What the fuck are you talking about owls for?” I mutter, walking toward the bathroom. The shower’s still running, so he obviously c

Conversation over dinner shifts to my year at school and the advertising companies Ashton is interviewing with.“So are you planning on staying here in New York?” I ask, taking a sip of wine.“If the job requires it. Most of these places have a short internship period here before it’s possible to transfer to other branches. All four companies I’m interviewing with have locations in Ohio, so I could go back home.” His eyes flick to mine. “If New York doesn’t work for me.”Genuinely curious, I ask, “What do you mean?”He hesitates, then shrugs. “Oh, you know. If I don’t adjust to city life.”I laugh. “Come on, Ashton. What’s not to love about the city? You can walk everywhere. The variety—food, experiences, people—all in one square block. That’s more than our entire hometown has in ten miles. Concerts, galleries, clubs, fashion, restaurants… New York’s got it all.” I stretch my arms wide to emphasize it.He grins. “You really love it here, don’t you?”“Of course!” I beam, stabbing anothe

I close my bedroom door quickly and lean my head against it, breathing hard. My chest aches. My eyes sting.No. I will not cry.Ashton never promised me anything. Up until tonight, he treated me like the annoying little sister my brother always did. We were comfortable. Familiar. More family than friends.Shit. What did I even think was going to happen?Sure, he touched me. And maybe we would’ve gone a lot further if my brother hadn’t called. But maybe it was for the best.Because if all this was just Ashton comforting me—if it was going to be a one-time thing—I didn’t want it.Yes, he’s hot. Yes, I’ve fantasized about him more times than I can count. Yes, I want his skin on mine, want to feel his hands all over me.But I don’t just want a body. I want Ashton James. I want him to be mine.And he just made it clear that he never will be.A single tear slips down my cheek. I swipe it away angrily—but another follows, then another. I wipe my face, frustrated and humiliated.Fine. I’m an

Ashton collapses on top of me, gathering me into his arms and kissing me deeply. Our bodies are still connected, our sweat mingling where our skin touches.My mind spins.Did he… did he really say he loves me?When he pulls back, his eyes are bright with happiness. He kisses me again, a soft peck this time, before sliding out of me. He stands, ties off the condom, and heads to the bathroom. I go after him, still dazed, and return to find him stretched out on the bed.As soon as he sees me, he smiles—shy and boyish. He pats the space beside him. “Come here.”I bite my lip, anxiety creeping in. Still, I lie beside him, tense and wrapped up in my thoughts.“What’s wrong?” Ashton asks, brows furrowing. “You’re not having second thoughts, are you?”I shoot up, facing him. My hands press to his chest and cheek. “No! God, no. I’ve wanted this… you… since I was thirteen. I just…” My voice trails off, unsure how to say it.He gently takes my chin and lifts it so I have to look at him. “Talk to