I tried my hardest to stay away from Nero for the next few days. Every morning, we would bump into each other while waiting for the elevator to come but we don’t share anything but a courteous nod. I would see him creasing his forehead after looking at me but I shrugged it off.
Less than seven weeks and I’ll be gone. I don’t need to have any ties stronger than camaraderie and friendship with anyone else. I can’t let my feelings grow for one person. Not when I know that I will leave soon. I won’t stay here. This is temporary.
Today, I decided to paint the whole view from my balcony. I’m glad I brought all of my painting materials and my canvas. I studies architecture in college because I thought it would help my dad’s company in the future. I could have just pursued fine arts.
I wanted to do free art. Not the one with inhibitions.
I looked out at all of the tourists having fun in playing volleyball. They are laughing as they played with one another. One was on the ground and everyone is laughing at her. She’s also laughing. I guess, they are all enjoying.
I turned my gaze towards the sea and saw people surfing over the waves. I wonder if Nero is there or if he’s their teacher. What kind of teacher does he make? Is he strict or is he someone so approachable?
I shook my head. I shouldn’t think about that now. I need to paint.
I started painting the ocean. The blue color of the water sparkles with the sun. I could be blinded at how beautiful it is. One day, I’m going to build a house near the beach, too.
I concentrated too much on the painting that I didn’t even notice that I haven’t eaten anything since breakfast. I was only startled when I heard someone knocking on my door.
I looked at my door before looking down at my dirty hands. I sighed and placed my painting board down. I walked towards the door while wiping my dirty hands on my apron.
“Who’s there?” I asked. I don’t want to open my door if I don’t know what the knock is about.
“It’s me.”
It was a hard and stern voice that sent me all these unknown emotions again. I bit my lip and covered my hand with my apron before turning the knob. I don’t want the paint in my hands to mess the door handle.
I opened the door and saw Nero standing in front of my door, wearing a white V-neck shirt and board shorts while holding a tray of food. Pasta and seafood are all in the tray with a pitcher of orange juice.
I looked at him in confusion. He stared back at me while biting his lower lip. He looked at me from head to foot and his forehead creased when he saw what I am wearing. I’m wearing a sleeveless shirt and shorts under this apron. It seemed to offend him.
“What…” My voice trailed when he motioned to come inside my room.
He went inside my room and my eyes widened when he looked so home in here. He placed the tray of food on top of my bed and I was silently relieved that I fixed my bed and all of my mess last night.
He looked around and then back at me. “You’re painting?” He asked.
I stared at back at him and nodded.
“So, you paint.” He stated.
“It’s obvious.” I told him sarcastically.
He raised his brow and walked towards the balcony. He eyed my painting critically. It’s as if he’s examining it if it could pass his standard or not.
Then he directed his gaze at me. “It’s good.” He nodded.
I rolled my eyes and walked towards my balcony as well. “Why are you here?” I asked.
He bit his lip before looking at me again. “I haven’t seen you all morning. I thought you’re sick so I chose to be the good man and brought you food.”
There’s something in my heart that leaped upon hearing his words. Was he looking for me? Did he worry for me? Oh, Kinsella. Stop thinking!
“My skin hurt from the sun so I decided to just stay inside my room for today.” I told him as I fixed my paint brush into the container.
“You’re done?” He asked.
I looked at the painting and nodded. “I’m only going to polish some areas but I’m done.” I replied.
“Good. Now, can we eat?” He asked.
I looked at him with my mouth in agape. “We’ll eat?” I almost laughed at his statement. Did he just barge into my room to eat with me?
He grinned. “Yes. We’ll eat.” He said as he pushed me gently inside the room towards the bathroom. “Go and wash. I’ll prepare the food.” He ordered as he left me inside the bathroom.
I bit my lip and watched his back go back to the bedroom. I shut my eyes and calmed myself. Whatever is stirring inside me, it’s all temporary. Once I got used to this, nothing would matter. I’d leave anyway.
It took me so long to remove the pain in my hands and I was shocked to see him watching me from the door. He’s leaning on the door frame with his arms crossed against his chest.
God! He looked so hot with his position. I immediately looked away and focused on removing the stains on my hands. I even have some on my face and I need to remove it all. Damn! I looked so ugly in front of him. I only realized now!
I almost leaped when I felt his presence close to me. He leaned down and held my hands, started to rub his hands with mine.
“You’re taking too long cleaning up on your own.” He said in a husky voice.
I looked at his face and was shocked to see him so serious in cleaning my hands. His hands are delicate. It’s like he would break me if he went a little harder.
I pursed my lips in a thin line as he looked up and met my gaze. He looked at my cheek and gently wiped the paint stain on it. His hands on my face made me shiver. I don’t know how I could even hide it from him.
This is the first time I was this close to the opposite sex other than my cousin and my Dad. I’m sure as hell it felt normal with my family but with Nero…I can feel my breath get sucked out of my lungs. How can one touch make you feel so much?
His eyes are all focused on that one stain in my cheek. He was so concentrated that he doesn’t even see what my reaction is right now.
“There.” He said as he brushed his thumb on the area for one last time. “All clean.”
His eyes immediately found mine and he didn’t remove his hand from my cheek. He was staring back at me. He gulped one time before letting me go. He took one step back.
“Let’s go eat. The food’s a little cold now.” He said before turning back and walking towards the bedroom again.
I sighed and shut my eyes. His sudden change in the way he treats me was my answer. Maybe he was just too helpful. Yes, he’s a staff member so I think he’s just really helpful and hospitable. Maybe that’s being a part of his hospitality. All of this is a part of his hospitality!
There! Stop thinking now, Kinsella!
I removed my apron and placed it on the hanger before following Nero in the bedroom.
I saw him sitting on the couch as the food was prepared on the center table. My room doesn’t have a decent dining table so I think he placed the food there.
He looked at me when I came up to him.
“Shall we eat?” He asked me.
I nodded and looked at the food. There’s baked macaroni, pesto and buttered shells. Nero placed food on my plate before giving it to me.
I bit my lip and muttered and a thanks before eating.
We ate in silence. I don’t know if he has plans on talking or does he plan on just eating with me. I didn’t start a topic, though. I don’t really know where to start. And I don’t plan on showing him how I will stutter when I talk to him.
I continued to eat without talking to him. Now, does he realize how wrong he is when he chose to become the good person and bring me food? I wish he knew how wrong it is to eat with me because I am such a boring person.
There’ll probably be no next time for this. And I’m sure, he would never even look at me next time. Hah! I can only laugh at my thoughts.
If that happens, then everything will fall into place. I don’t have to be the only to avoid him because he’ll also be awkward with me. He’ll also avoid me and then, I won’t need to work harder. I won’t need to feel guilty either.
I heard him cough and I looked at him. He’s already eyeing me and that surprised me. Was he staring at me the whole time?
I also noticed that he finished eating. He’s just finished drinking his juice while I think I didn’t even ate a quarter of all the food he put on my plate.
He frowned when he glanced at my plate. “Don’t you like the food?” He asked me.
I bit my lip. “I love it. The food’s great.” I replied.
“Then why do you look like it’s so hard to swallow the food?”
I didn’t speak. I feel like he’s scolding me and I can’t talk back. He stared at me for a few more moments before letting out a heavy breath.
“You don’t want to eat with me.”
My heart fell when I heard him say that. No. I think I would love to eat with him but with all these mixed up emotions in my system, I don’t think I would be comfortable around him.
He bit his lip before looking at me again. “What did I do wrong? Did I do something wrong?” He asked me in a careful voice. It’s as if he’s scared of how I will answer his question but still asked anyway.
“You didn’t do anything wrong.”
His gaze softened. He looked relieved for a moment but his stern look came back in a blink. “Then why do I feel like you’re avoiding me?”
I bit my lip and looked at my food. He’s right. I’m avoiding him. But will I have the guts to tell him the reason why I am doing that? I don’t want to feel close to him—or to anyone—because I know I will leave soon. Would he understand that? I, myself, can’t even comprehend all the surge of emotions I am feeling right now, how would he?
I couldn’t sleep at night. I spent my time watching boring YouTube videos to induce sleep but I couldn’t get to free my mind of all of these thoughts.Nero left the moment I finished my food. He did not show up right after.I didn’t answer his question. I couldn’t bring myself to. I denied that I was avoiding him. But then, can one admit that she’s avoiding one man because emotions are stirring up inside her? I don’t think so. I think I did the only choice I have.I opened my email and noticed that I had two emails from Kino.From: Kino SloaneSubject: WE ARE GOING CRAZYHey, Ella! Where are you? Tell me now that I’m asking you directly before I hire someone to find you and get you back h
Today I will jog early in the morning. I feel like I’ve been eating and slouching too much that my fats are about to show up anytime soon.I wore a mid-riff racerback and leggings. I tied my hair in a high ponytail as I faced myself in the mirror. My eyes went back to my body. I’m not curvy. I’m not slim either. I look average. There’s nothing I can flaunt to guys other than my legs. But why would I flaunt my legs anyway?I shook my head and decided to clear my mind for this. I needed to run to clear my mind.I tied my iPod Nano on my right upper arm and plugged my earphones on. I put on my Nikes and went out of the room.For my first week in this place, I’ve noticed people biking and jogging by the shoreline. I heard
I turned off the airplane mode of my phone for the first time in weeks. As I opened it, hundreds of messages came along. From Dad, from Aunt Miranda and from Kino. All of them are asking my whereabouts and on why I am not responding to their texts. Luckily, Kino was the only smart one out of them to reach me through the email.I walked towards my closet and changed into a yellow sundress. I’m going to the spa for massage this afternoon. This is my first time going to a real spa because I was always grounded in the house all of my life.“Good afternoon, Miss Sloane! Looks like you’re ready to go again?” Heart greeted me by the reception.I smiled and nodded. “Yes.”“Well, have fun, Miss Sloane.” She cheered
Nero leaned his forehead on mine. He’s breathing heavily and his eyes are closed. It’s as if kissing me drained and sucked all of the oxygen in him.“You can’t avoid me now, Miss Sloane.” He repeated as he caressed my cheek.I bit my lip and looked away. Now, I won’t be able to stop anything that’s starting to grow inside me. He’s made me crazy for him.But above all, that was my first kiss. I haven’t kissed anyone in my whole life. Not the way Nero kissed me. How will I be able to kiss someone else again when he’s already set that damn standard high up in the pedestal?“Hey,” he called me and lifted my chin to face him. “I’m sorry. Did I freak you out?” he a
After eating breakfast, Nero waited for me to change into appropriate attire before going out of the room. He made me change three times. First, he didn’t like that I wore bikini. Second, he didn’t like the shortness of the skirt. Third, he didn’t like how revealing the neckline was.On the fourth try, he approved. I wore a gray rash guard and a pair of mid-thigh length board shorts. I was glaring at him the whole time but he just wouldn’t budge. He’s so strict with the dress code.I don’t even know why he doesn’t want me to wear bikini. It’s appropriate for the place and for the ambience. Anyone can even skinny dip here and it’s going to be fine because it’s a beach.I was mumbling words under my breath as we went inside the lift. He&rsqu
Nero followed me until I reached one of the sun loungers on the beach side. A lot of tourists are having fun in some of the loungers but we had enough for us. I sat on the lounger and bit my lip.No, Kinsella. He said he wanted you. He said he liked you. He didn’t say he wanted to be with you. He called you baby several times but that’s because he’s a flirt and he’s flirting with you.That was what I was thinking when I reached the loungers. Nero sat beside me and made me face him. He looked at me worried. “Hey, is something wrong?” He asked.I shut my eyes. “Nothing.” I replied. No, more like I lied.Nero frowned in front of
I’ve spent the whole week with Nero. It was fun to be with him. He also taught me to surf and I think I’m getting better and better every day. As for Lucy, she’s so civil in front of me. Well, it’s not like I want to be close to her anyway. She likes Nero but he likes me. The situation’s a bit fouled up.Today, I am headed off towards the beach again. Nero said he’ll be busy but I didn’t bother asking about what would keep him occupied today. Maybe I’d see him by the shore since he’s a surd instructor.I decided to just chill under the heat of the sun to pass time. Besides, being alone sometimes helps me think things through. I’ve made some friends around, like Greg and Leslie, who, apparently are also staying in the hotel for a vacation. They’re with their other close friends.“You’ve been here for a month now?” I asked as Leslie sat down beside the lounger that I am in.
I couldn’t recognize if these are tears or if the wetness of my face are from the foam party. I walked towards the hotel, straight to my room.The pain is etched in my chest, like it doesn’t have plans on leaving me alone. The more I close my eyes, the more it keeps replaying inside my head. The way he wraps his arms around her and the way she welcomed his mouth in hers. Tears brimmed in the corners of my eyes as I sat on the floor.This is what I get for trusting people too much. This is all my fault. I let him get through me and now, I’m played, I’m down and I’m broken. Stupid.I shook my head as I laughed weakly at myself. Stupid Kinsella, this is what happens when you trust people. This is what you get for trusting in sweet words. I gulped and pulled myself up. I have more than a month left to enjoy this vacation. I shouldn’t be affected with these kinds. I’m going to leave soon. I can even cut this