Prologue

3rd Person POV

“Ohh myyy! Girl, are you okay?” a concerned woman asked when she saw Suzy collapsed on the ground, completely drunk.

How many months had she been like this? Three months…or  maybe more. Ever since that accident happened, she had never been able to forget it, instead it kept ringing inside her head.

“H-Hi… hic can you get me a taxi please pretty? hic” she asked, all sense of shame long gone, maybe that one is already in hell because of what she did.

“Isn’t that dangerous? Where do you live? I’ll take you home instead. It’s not safe out here—you’re outside a bar. Someone might take advantage of you,” the woman insisted gently.

Suzy grinned lazily and looked up at her, she saw a beautiful woman. “Thank you… I live in Bakakeng… hic.” She was terribly drunk, but thankfully she could still answer questions.

“Oh my, that’s quite far and a bit complicated, but it’s fine. I’ll help you. It’s better than leaving you here where someone might mess with you,” it said.

The woman helped her stand and guided her to the car. To make sure she was safe, she even fastened Suzy’s seatbelt in the backseat. The girl was worried that she might bump her head on the back of the passenger seat. Thank goodness someone kind-hearted had seen her that night.

The car started moving, and the spinning inside her head made her want to vomit, though thankfully she managed to hold it in. The woman kept checking on her through the rearview mirror to make sure she was alright.

When they finally reached Bakakeng, Suzy managed to point out the directions to her house.

“We’re here… yey! hic” she slurred.

As soon as the car stopped, she automatically removed the seatbelt from her body and somehow, she didn’t know how she managed to open the door. The moment she stepped out, she almost kissed the ground, but the woman quickly caught her.

“Can you manage, girl? Are you sure that this is really your house?” the woman asked worriedly.

“Yes! Just trust me,” Suzy replied with a grin.

The woman sighed but supported her all the way to the gate. She pressed the doorbell several times before a man finally came out. He looked like he had just woken up, clearly she disturbed a man.

“Sorry, sir. Does she live here? I saw her earlier—she’s really drunk,” the woman shyly explained.

The girl bit her lip when she saw the young man's full figure. He was so handsome and his body was exposed in his fitted clothing. “Alex! Is that you? Alex, I’m sorry!” Suzy suddenly screamed, repeatedly calling his name.

She broke free from the girl’s hold and stumbled toward the man even though the gate was still closed. “I know her. She’s my neighbor, don’t worry, I’ll take care of her,” the man said.

He stepped out of the gate and took Suzy from the woman and the woman shivered but she couldn't stay long now, she looked at the address of the house and noted it carefully.

“Alright, I’ll go ahead. I still have work,” the woman said before leaving.

Moments later, she drives away while her eyes can’t take off out of him.

“Alex… it’s you. Have you forgiven me?” Suzy asked weakly.

“There’s no forgiveness for what you did. A life was lost because of you,” he said coldly.

Her head lowered, she bit her lower lip before looking up again. “It’s been months… but I still can’t forgive myself, can you help me? Please.” Her lips trembled as she spoke, unable to meet his eyes filled with hatred.

He smirked. “It’s good to hear that you’re suffering. That’s right—don’t ever forget what you did.”

Her knees gave out, and she fell to the ground as tears streamed down her face. “Then what should I do for you to forgive me, Alex?” she asked, looking up at him through blurry vision, though his fury was still clear.

He grabbed her chin firmly, forcing her to look at him. “A lost life needs to be replaced by another life. Give me one,” he said with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes

.

“Y-you know that I can’t do that Alex, I don’t understand,” she whispered.

He smirked again and lowered his head. She gasped when he captured her lips. She didn’t know why she didn’t resist—instead, her arms wrapped around his neck.

He carried her inside the house. She didn’t even realize how they ended up in the living room until she felt the sofa beneath her.

Their lips didn’t part until both of them were breathless. He pulled away slightly and stared at her with a threatening gaze.

“Remember this, Suzy. You’ll regret asking for my forgiveness,” he said coldly.

“I don’t care anymore, Alex. Please… just forgive me.” Tears streamed down her face, and he seemed satisfied seeing her like that.

After that, everything escalated into something she hadn’t expected. He took the most precious thing she had left. Because she was under the influence of alcohol, she couldn’t think clearly. She was willing to do anything just to earn his forgiveness.

Hours later, her body ached terribly. She turned to look at the sleeping Alex beside her.

His face looked so gentle—like someone incapable of cruelty. Her eyes burned as she tried to hold back her tears, but she couldn’t.

“How can I remove these feelings for you when you keep giving me reasons to fall even deeper?” she whispered without realizing she had spoken aloud.

He didn’t respond, still asleep. But unexpectedly, he turned toward her and wrapped his arms around her. She tried to pull away, but he only held her tighter.

All she could do was cry and cry until she eventually fell asleep against his chest.

The next morning, she woke up to sunlight hitting her face. She stared at the ceiling, replaying everything that had happened. She remembers everything, every tiny detail of it.

“Has he forgiven me?” she asked herself. “I wish,” she whispered.

Despite the pain in her body, she forced herself to get up. He wasn’t beside her anymore, so she assumed he might be downstairs. She went to the bathroom to wash her face. Tears almost fell again when she felt pain even in the simplest movements. She bit her lip and endured it.

After fixing herself, she slowly went downstairs—but she didn’t see him anywhere.

She searched the entire house. The garden. The living room. The bathroom. Even the laundry area. He wasn’t there. “Maybe he went jogging?” she murmured to herself. “Right… he must be jogging.”

She even smiled at the thought, remembering how disciplined he was with the gym and running.

But he wasn’t in the kitchen either.

Instead, she found food on the table covered neatly—ham, eggs, hotdogs, tocino, and a large serving of fried rice. There was juice too. And what touched her the most—a letter.

“He forgave me… thank you, Lord,” she said tearfully as she looked up and silently thanked heaven.

She grabbed utensils but decided to read the letter first. Her eyes sparkled with hope as she opened it.

Only for that hope to shatter.

Dear Suzy,

Just like I said, you will regret asking for my forgiveness. No matter what happens, I will never give you what you’re asking for. Suffer every day and pay for what you did.

Fill out the marriage certificate that my family’s lawyer will bring. If you’re truly sincere in asking for forgiveness, sign it and endure the consequences. You need to remember everything and savor the pain, that way, I will think if I can forgive you.

I’m no longer in the Philippines. I went back to the person I love because I can’t stand being with you. I don’t want to stay with a murderer.

Alexander… until we meet again.

Her tears fell onto the paper. For a second, she wanted to believe someone else had written it to ruin them—but the handwriting proved otherwise. It was his penmanship.

She thought he had forgiven her.

She was very wrong, how can she think that he can forgive her after everything happened, and that is because of her, it's all her fault no matter what angle she looks at it from, he's not the only one saying it's her fault, Alex too and the young man is right because she needs to pay for everything that happened.

That was why she couldn’t find him anywhere in the house. He hadn’t gone jogging.

He had already left.

He had returned to the woman he truly loved.

At that thought, her tears flowed endlessly.

“If this is the only way for you to forgive me, my love, then I will do it. I will savor this pain until the day I die. I just hope… someday… you’ll forgive me, even if I have no assurance that you ever will,” she whispered to the empty air.

Because the person she wanted to say those words to was already gone.