Chapter 5

Anastasia’s POV

"Say no more," Kate said resolutely. "Saan mo gustong pumunta? Let's get out of here."

"Gusto kong uminom," I answered straight out, not even hesitating. I needed alcohol, and I needed a lot of it. I needed to numb the anger rushing through my veins, and more than that, I needed to drown out the painful emptiness left by the man I had pushed away just last night. "I need a drink, Kate. Please. Somewhere loud, somewhere hard."

"Say less, bestfriend," Kate smiled fiercely, grabbing her own purse from the couch. "May alam akong bagong speakeasy bar sa BGC. High-end, private, and they serve the strongest cocktails in the city. My treat."

"Let's go," I said, pulling my sunglasses back over my eyes to hide the rage and the sadness creeping back in.

Nang lumabas kami ng boutique, may naramdaman akong strange sensation, an ice-cold thrill that made my muscles shiver. Sandali akong tumigil sa paglalakad, looking around the busy streets, pero wala namang kakaiba. I felt that eyes were on me, pero baka imagination ko lang ‘yon. Hindi ko na lang ito pinansin at sumakay na sa sasakyan ng aking kaibigan.

I didn't care about Kristian, I didn't care about his mistress, and I tried, desperately, not to care about the baby boy I left bleeding in that club room. Tonight, I just wanted to forget.

******

The bass from the speakers was thumping through the floorboards, a heavy, rhythmic vibration that matched the dull pounding inside my head. The place was dim, bathed in warm amber lights and low-hanging crimson lamps. It was luxurious, secretive, and full of people who didn't give a damn about who I was. Perfect.

Since nag-volunteer si Kate na magda-drive pauwi, iinom ako hanggang sa malasing ako nang todo. Gusto kong ilabas lahat, the rage, the betrayal, and especially the suffocating heartbreak that was threatening to rip my chest open.

"Another double shot of Macallan, please," sabi ko sa bartender.

Vibrate. Vibrate. Vibrate.

My phone buzzed on the dark marble bar top for what felt like the hundredth time. Kristian's name flashed across the screen, na para bang nire-remind niya ako sa kanyang walang kwentang existence. Tangina naman! Ayaw akong tantanan ng bwisit na lalaking 'to!

"Aba, talagang hindi ka titigilan niyan, 'no?" inis na sabi ni Kate, taking a sip of her cosmopolitan. "Dalawang taon siyang tahimik tapos ngayon kung makatawag, parang devoted husband na nag-aalala sa’yo.”

"Bwisit," I muttered under my breath. “I’m sure may kailangan na naman siya sa akin o kaya naman ang mistress niya.” I grabbed the phone, swiped the screen, and aggressively powered it off. Darkness consumed the display, at inilagay ko ito sa aking purse. Problem solved. At least for tonight.

I downed the whiskey in one go, feeling the hot liquid burn its way down my throat. It didn't even make me flinch anymore. I slammed the glass back on the counter and stared blankly at the ice cubes melting inside it.

Ang pagbabalik ni Kristian ay nagdulot ng matinding poot sa aking kalooban. Also, the real reason kung bakit nakakaramdam ako ng sakit sa puso ko ay dahil sa isang lalaki na iniwan ko sa club. The one that was currently tearing my soul into bloody ribbons. It was about him. Siya lang ang gumugulo sa isip ko ngayon. My baby boy.

My mind wandered back to the dark red room at the club. To his hurt eyes, his clenching jaw, and the devastating silence after I told him it was over. Kumuha na kaya siya ng panibagong client ngayong gabi? Para akong tinamaan ng malakas na force sa isiping ‘yon. Did he go straight to another private room? Is he touching another woman right now? Licking her skin, making her feel alive the way he did to me for two whole years?

Napakuyom ang kamay ko sa baso. The sheer image of him with someone else made me want to throw up. It was sickening. It made me want to burn the world down.

God, please... I silently prayed, my vision blurring with sudden, unwanted tears. Sana tinanggap mo na lang 'yung card at susi, baby boy. Please... start a new life. Don't go back to being an escort. Ayaw kong may iba kang hinahawakan.

"Ana?" I flinched, quickly wiping my cheek before looking up. Kate was staring at me, her brow furrowed, her eyes swimming with deep, unsettling concern.

"Okay, spill," she said, her voice dropping all the playfulness it had earlier. Humarap siya sa akin completely, at inilagay ang kanyang drink sa mesa. "Na-badtrip ka kay Kristian, yes. Nasumbatan mo siya, yes. But I've known you since high school, Ana. We are practically sisters already. I know how you react when you're angry at your useless husband. You get cold, you get ruthless, and you drink wine. You don't get this smashed on hard liquor while looking like your whole world just ended."

"Gusto ko lang malasing, hard… so hard. I want to forget…"

"Huwag mo 'kong sasabihan ng ganyan," she cut me off, her tone firm. "I saw your eyes when you thought I wasn't looking. You look heartbroken, Ana. And I know for a damn fact that Kristian doesn't have the power to break your heart anymore. So, kung hindi 'yung bwisit mong asawa... sino? Sino ang dahilan kung bakit ka umiiyak nang ganyan?"