Chapter Three

FIVE YEARS LATER

"Move your ass, damn it!" I yell maniacally, slamming my hand repeatedly on my horn. But it only earns me a couple of complaints and cusses from the other drivers.

Dejectedly, I slouch back in my seat, hating how terrible my day has become. I check my Rolex wristwatch, and I'm already ten minutes late.

Oh no. My poor baby. She's definitely feeling bad right now. I promised I'd be in the front seats, cheering her on. She's graduating from preschool today, and she needs me to tell her how proud I am. But here I am, stuck in messy traffic, with no hope of getting out any sooner.

The soft tune of 'California King Bed' wafts through my speaker, chilling my agitated nerves. I glance at the massive rose bouquet and the box of chocolate on the passenger seat, and it makes my heart bleed anew.

If only the meeting hadn't taken so much time. Recalling the meeting and everything discussed sends thrills to my body. It's a complicated mixture of being happy and sad.

In the five years I've spent building a career out of business planning and working for the biggest company in California, I've wished for nothing but my big break. A big global break. My coworkers chastised me for being overly ambitious, but who gives a shit? 

I'm not some damsel in dismay who'll sit around and wait for a man to give me the world. I'm an ambitious queen who'll seize the world myself, with no help from any man. 

Finally, I did. I got what I wanted. The big break I've strived for in so long, but it comes with a condition. I am going back to my past. And that's something I'm not so thrilled about.

The loud honks from the back jolt me from my thoughts, and I notice the cars are moving now. 

"Finally!" I exhale excitedly, revving my engine and speeding off to my little girl's school.

She's already holding her diploma when I arrive, but she has a forlorn look on her face. I place my bag on an empty seat, taking out my phone to take pictures of her.

Somehow, her roaming gaze singles me out in the crowd, and her face glows with a smile. 

"Mummy!" She squeals, waving at me. My God, she's so beautiful. More beautiful than I ever was at her age.

"I love you, baby." I blow her a kiss, still clicking and taking millions of pictures. I need so much to always remember today.

When the event ends, she runs into my arms, and we hold each other so tightly. Talk about the bond between a mother and her daughter. Sofia and I got the best. We are joined at the hips. Inseparable. She's literally my only friend.

"I thought you forgot about today, Mummy." She pouts as we break away from each other. Her eyes were glistening with tears and happiness. "I was so scared…"

"What are you saying, baby? I'll never forget about a day as important as this. I'm so sorry I came late. Hope you forgive me?" I stretch the box of chocolates to her with a pouty smile.

"Chocolates!!!" She squeals, grabbing the box. "Thank you, Mummy. I love you." She pecks my cheek.

"I love you too, baby. Come, let's go take more pictures of you. We have to show them to your Grandma Anna later."

"Okay, Mummy. But can I carry the flowers?" She asks, and I hand her the flowers. 

"Of course, baby. They're for you." Hand in hand, we leave the hall and join the others in taking pictures. 

We take a ton of pictures, but halfway, I realize she has a frown on her face. And she isn't looking at the camera anymore. She's staring at a family, -a man, a woman, and their two kids– taking pictures close to us.

"Baby, what's wrong?" I ask worriedly, going close to her. "Are you feeling tired?"

She shakes her head. "Mummy, where is Daddy? I thought you said he'll be here today. Where is he?"

Caught off-guard by her question, I'm speechless for a few seconds. And then I squat in front of her, giving her a playful pinch on her chubby cheeks.

"I'm sorry, baby, but Daddy had to work. He couldn't come."

"But you promised he'll be here."

What else was I supposed to say when she kept bugging me about her Daddy and if he'll be coming to the event? I had to say the only thing that would make her calm.

For five years, I've been thrown the "Where is Daddy?" question once or twice every month from the moment she started speaking. And I always gave her the typical "Daddy traveled for a long-term business" reply. But she's never satisfied. She asks for a picture. A letter from him. His phone number. Those questions leave me so depressed and bitter. If only I could tell her the truth, that her Daddy doesn't exist. He was a mistake of one night, and I have no memories of what he looks like.

"I think Daddy hates me. That's why he never wants to see me. My friends are really lucky because they've got their Daddies."

"Hey, Sofia. That's not true –" My words are left unfinished as she walks to the other family, distracting their photoshoot.

"Hello, Mister. Would you please take a picture with me?" She says to the man, who's staring at her weirdly. "You see, my Daddy couldn't come, so I have no Daddy to take pictures with."

"Sofia," I mouth, signaling at her to get back to my side, but she ignores me and continues.

"Please, it'll only take a minute." She puts her hands up in a plea, giving her best doe eyes. 

"Of course, little princess. Where's your Mummy?" The man obliges with a smile. Who will ever say no to her? She has a way of making anyone do her bidding.  

Others call it 'sweet.' I call it a bit of that and 'manipulative.' Still, it is what it is.

The man comes over to where I'm standing, and we both share a quick handshake.

"I'm really sorry about my daughter. She's just a child and doesn't know much. I'm sorry for the inconvenience." I say in a ramble, feeling nervous and somewhat embarrassed.

"It's not a problem. You have a charming daughter. I think you should be proud of her." The man replies. Good thing he's understanding and warm.

I take a picture of both of them, and Sofia flashes her best smile. She's never smiled that much when we both take pictures. Is this how badly she's craving a father?

I wish I could give her that, but I can't. Her Father is nonexistent, and I'm never trusting my life in any man's hand. I'm never taking such foolhardy risks. I've built so much, and I'll be damned if I let any man come into our lives and destroy it.

At dinner that evening, Sofia eats quietly, but she still has that frown. 

"How did the event go, baby?" Aunt Anna asks her, breaking the silence.

"Fineeee…" She draws, stuffing the meatballs into her mouth with zero enthusiasm.

"Sofia looked so beautiful today, Aunt Anna. You should see the pictures we took." I chirp in giddiness, trying to ease the tension.

"Really, baby?" Aunt Anna turns to her again, rubbing a hand over her back. "I'm so proud of you."

"Yeah, but Daddy isn't," Sofia replies blandly.

"Why do you say that?" Aunt Anna asks her.

"He didn't show up. And I know you'll say that he has work, but my friends' daddies have work too. But they came. Why is mine different? Why, Mummy?" She breaks into tears, excuses herself from the table, and runs to her room.

A tear slides down my eyes and another before Aunt Anna places her hand on mine, giving me a soft squeeze.

"I want to tell her the truth, but I can't. She won't understand. If only she would…"

I cry a bit more until I'm calm enough to discuss what is churning my insides.

"I got a job offer today, Aunt. Something big. Worth over a billion dollars."

"Really?!" Aunt Anna gasps. "That's good news. But why do you look so sad?"

"Well, I have to be an exclusive business planner for the Galiano corporation."

"Yeah, the multi-billion company. They have a branch here in California,"

"Yes, they do. But the offer is from the headquarters in La Nostra Terra."

"Oh." A frown flickers over her face, but it leaves immediately. "It's still great news."

"No, it's not. I don't want to return to La Nostra Terra."

"Why not?" She resorts sharply. "You have nothing to be ashamed of anymore. You got a great reputation now in the business world. You're a successful woman. You have the most beautiful daughter in the world. And you're doing great. You have no reason to keep hiding, Irene. It's time we go back home, and you face your fears. It's time you show the whole world that you were never a disappointment…."

I let her words sink in, and she's right. I have no more reason to hide. I survived my pain. Came out stronger. Why the hell am I still hiding?

"I'll be right back, aunt. Let me call my boss and tell him that I accept the offer." I say, feeling extreme excitement for the first time since I got the news.

"That's my girl."