Chapter 17

When I saw that bitch straddling Elliot, I don't know what it was that made me respond the way I did. I'm sure I shouldn't have made such a fuss. I'm sure I shouldn't have been so enraged. For the love of God, I'm engaged. What I don't understand is why I behaved the way I did.

It bothered me that she was all over him, while Elliot was clearly enjoying every moment of it. I was furious when I caught her kissing my boyfriend! Yeah? Your boyfriend, Ari? Are you sure he's the real boyfriend? Gosh! I'm talking about my fake boyfriend!

I'm a total shameless flirt! What is it about Elliot that makes me feel this way? I fucking have a boyfriend, and I just got engaged to him, which is a huge plus. But why do I still have the impression that the feelings I've had for Elliot that I tried to bury are slowly seeping back into my life? Why is it making its presence felt so suddenly? And every day, I'm left perplexed.

I'm trying to convince myself that Matt's absence makes me miss him more. And