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It's been about a few days now and I still haven't seen Luciano. It does suck but, it’s teaching me some self discipline. Maybe, I should call my mom? It’s been dwelling on my mind for a few days now. I want to actually update her about what’s been happening in my life so far. She doesn’t know that much, I do contact my parents of course they’re my parents but it’s not as much as I’d like. It’s weekly but right now I really need to call her. After my parents divorce, she had to adjust to life without a person she’s known and loved for ages. Though our situations aren’t really all that similar because well I don’t ‘love’ Luciano, I wanna ask her about what I should do. These few weeks have been pretty shitty. Amara has been ignoring me and acting like I don't even exist. I mean I get that she’s mad and yes I knew that if she did ever find out she’d be of course mad at me but ugh. I wish things were different. I wish that she’d forgive me but that seems almost impossible. Whenever I see
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