เข้าสู่ระบบCheryl
After a few hours of tossing around on my bed last night, I was finally able to sleep until my alarm pulled me up again. Fuck. I barely got any sleep. I dragged myself upright, rubbing my eyes with the heels of my palms. My head was throbbing. I hated school. Well, except for the journalist part of my activity I got to do because I get to watch the hockey boys and interview them. That part I actually loved. My camera was the only thing that made me feel invisible in school, I could watch Carlson all I wanted. I've interviewed every single player on the team. Every single one except him. I had just one week. If I could interview Carlson and analyze him, his plays, his patterns, his strengths and weaknesses... and if Dad saw it, if the school saw it, then maybe I could secure my place. But to do that, I needed to summon the courage to interview him. The one person I'd been avoiding for years. I tossed myself off the bed, walking towards my little bathroom when I noticed my door was open. I froze. I always make sure my door is locked before I sleep. Every night I check it twice—once before I get into bed, and once after I've settled in. It's a habit born from living with Celeste, who has no concept of boundaries and even less respect for my privacy. Who could have... My eyes went wide. Celeste!! I dove for my nightstand, yanking open the drawer. My fingers went through the mess of old loose papers and empty notebooks, searching desperately. There was nothing. My drawer was empty and my journal was fucking gone. "No, no, no, no, no—" I went through everything. I flipped my mattress, sending my pillows flying across the room. I dumped my entire backpack onto the floor, scattering things everywhere. I opened my closet, throwing clothes aside, checking every pocket of every jacket. My journal was truly gone. I felt sick as my hands started shaking so bad I could barely grip the edge of my dresser. She took it. That bitch actually took my journal. "Oh God, oh God, oh God—" I ran out of my room and down the stairs. Everywhere was so quiet meaning everyone was gone already. My parents were already gone, too, probably dropping Celeste off at her precious game. I spun around, my eyes darting frantically around the living room. I grabbed the nearest thing I could find... a pair of flower printed leggings that definitely weren't mine and an oversized hoodie. I pulled them on without even caring how mismatched I looked. I grabbed my bag, not bothering to check if I had everything. Jogging down the road, I knew I probably looked like a crazy person with wild brown loose hair. I needed to catch up with her before she exposed everything. As I stepped into the school gate darting for the hallway, I heard people whispering behind their hands while some had their phones up recording me. I kept my head down and my hands covering my face as I rushed inside the school. I wasn't looking where I was going. I just wanted to get inside, and disappear into a classroom and hide all fucking day. I kept running with tears threatening to fall down my cheek. I couldn't believe Celeste would do that to me. I kept running until I crashed into something hard and my head hit a very solid manly chest, and I stumbled back, my hands flying out to catch myself. I closed my eyes, ready to hit the floor, when strong hands grabbed my arms, steadying me before I could fall. I looked up while relaxing myself from the arms that caught me immediately. Carlson. His gray eyes locked onto mine with his dark hair all messy, falling across his forehead in that way that always made my stomach flip and I suddenly wished I didn't get up so quick from those warm arms. He was close to my face and I recognized that Bleu de Chanel cologne he always uses. He stared right back at me with his jaw tight, parting his lips like he wanted to say something while I stood there eager to hear what he wanted to say. "Carlson! We're gonna be late!" One of his teammates, Remy, grabbed his shoulder, pulling him back. Carlson didn't move, his eyes were fixed on me. "Bro, come on!" He blinked before letting go of my arms and stepped back. He didn't say anything anymore but turned and walked away with his friends. I stood there frozen, my heart beating so hard until I heard mean voices behind my back. "Looks like someone's desperate for attention." I turned so fast to see Celeste and her best friend beside her, while some others gathered and I could see them with their phones up again. "Did you see that? Exactly what I was talking about," Celeste said to Megan. "She literally threw herself at him." Megan snorted. I tried to walk away, maybe toward the bathroom, where they wouldn't hover around me. But Megan stepped in front of me, blocking my path with her bony shoulder. "Wait, wait," she said, holding up a hand. "I have a question. When you wrote about him fucking you, were you like—" She made a crude gesture, pumping her hand up and down near her crotch. "—shaking like a dying fish while you wrote it? Probably using your tears to oil your pussy cause you know he'll never ever lay his hands on you." Celeste and the rest of the people burst out laughing. "She'd probably die if he actually touched her," Celeste said, clutching her chest like she was genuinely concerned. "Or her heart would give out from the shock and she would cum on the spot like the desperate little whore she is." I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. "Good, Carlson is the hockey captain and only fits for someone of his league. Which is Celeste. So stay out of your sister's lane and stop trying to steal her spotlight." "If that was so, I wonder why she hasn't been seen with Carlson either. It seems like someone of his league rejected her, right Celeste?" "You—" She stepped forward with her hand raised as if to punch me when she stopped, then sashayed past me tossing her hair over her shoulder while her friends and minions trailing behind her like a pack of hyenas. I stood there, my back leaning against the lockers. I didn't bother to think about going to class anymore as the hockey arena was my only safe space for now. I wanted to keep myself busy and not think of my sister's bullying. I had to film the team's practice for my analysis work. I pushed open the heavy door to the arena and the rink was empty. No one was here yet for practice. Good. I needed a moment to breathe. I walked toward the bench where I usually set up my equipment, my bag over my shoulder. I blinked hard, forcing the tears away. Stealing your sister's spotlight. No one knew that Celeste actually stole my spotlight when we were kids. Hockey has always been my passion. I'd always loved it. Always dreamed of it. I pulled out my camera and laptop as I recalled memories of that day when I was on the rink playing with other kids and Celeste and her friends shoved me down and I got my ankle injured. Since then I've never got to play as my therapist had said. Now I have to settle down to be a journalist. I opened my laptop when rough hands covered my eyes. My first instinct was to scream but another palm was over my mouth, making my screams turn to muffles. I thrashed wildly, my heart beating so hard. Another set of hands grabbed my arms, yanking them behind my back so hard my shoulders popped. "Fast," I heard a deep male voice growling. "Steal all her analyst equipment. We need to be quick so we don't disappoint ma'am." I tried to bite the hand covering my mouth. "Bitch," the voice hissed. "Hold her still." Someone else grabbed my hair, yanking my head back so hard I saw stars. I couldn't tell how many they were at this point. But what do they want from me? Tears spilled from my eyes as I almost gave up struggling. I felt them grab my camera, my laptop, everything. They yanked cords out of the wall, threw my bag aside, and started shoving everything into a duffel bag. "Stop!" I tried to scream. "Please–" The door to the arena burst open. "Hey!" I heard a familiar voice and the hands let go of my eyes, my mouth. Literally my whole face. Carlson rushed in with Remy at his back. The men shoved me down until my knees hit the ground. "Go! Go!" one of them yelled. They scrambled toward the back exit, jumping over the fence. Carlson was already running toward the back door. "Remy! Alert security! Now!" Then he turned back to me. He crouched down, his hands reaching for me. "Cheryl," he said softly. "Are you okay?”Cheryl.I stood frozen in the middle of the quad. The crowd tightened around us, drawing in with that particular hunger people get when they sense a public execution. Phones were raised at every angle. The exact same eighteen seconds of footage played back on at least a dozen screens within my line of sight. Over and over, my own face remained buried against Dylan's chest, repeating like a loop of accusation.The tight crop made it worse every time I glanced at it.Dylan's arm hung over my shoulders, framing me against him while erasing everything that had happened. It stripped away the tears, the exhaustion, and the simple truth that I needed someone to sit with me while he asked for nothing in return. Watching it now, isolated from reality, I could almost believe the story it was spinning. That frightened me more than the crowd did."I was crying," I said, pushing the words out against a voice that shook so violently I barely recognized it. "My family had just torn into me. Dylan f
CherylI felt it before I understood it: the particular shift in the air that happens when you become the subject of something you don't yet know exists. Conversations died as I passed. Heads turned. A girl near the fountain lifted her phone and angled it my way before quickly lowering it when she caught me noticing.My stomach knotted. An old, familiar dread rose before I had a single piece of information to justify it.I had not checked my phone since last night. After the family meeting, after the rink, after Dylan walked me most of the way home before I insisted I could manage the rest alone, I fell into bed too exhausted to do anything but sleep, my phone forgotten face-down on the nightstand."Cheryl."Amara's voice cut through the noise of the quad. I turned to see her jogging toward me, her face pale in a way that made my chest tighten before she said another word. She grabbed my arm the second she reached me, pulling me slightly off the main path. Her eyes scanned the crowd
CelesteI sat on my bed with my laptop balanced on my knees, watching the footage for the eleventh time. I studied every frame the way I imagined Cheryl studied hockey plays, searching for the exact angle that would land hardest, the exact half-second that would do the most damage.The raw clip was good. Better than good. Cheryl's face buried against Dylan's chest, his arms wrapped around her, the two of them illuminated just enough by the rink's emergency lighting to be unmistakably identifiable, unmistakably intimate.Raw footage needed context to do real work, though, and context was something I was always good at building. Ever since I was young, I understood that the truth mattered far less than what people were willing to believe about it.I trimmed the clip down to the eighteen seconds that mattered most: the moment Dylan's hand slid up her back, the moment she turned her face further into his shoulder instead of pulling away. I cut out the part where he asked if she wanted him
CherylI didn't decide to run to the rink. My feet just carried me there, the way they always did, drawn by some old, worn groove in me that still equated that particular sheet of ice with the only kind of safety I ever fully trusted.The building was locked for the night. I knew the side door by the equipment bay stuck if you leaned into it the right way, a trick I learned years ago filming late practices nobody else wanted to stay for. I let myself in and climbed up into the bleachers. The metal bit cold through my jeans as I sat there in the dark, pulling my knees tight to my chest.The tears came before I even fully settled, quiet at first, then rolling out of control. My whole body shook with the effort of holding two years, maybe my whole life, of accumulated hurt behind a composure that had finally, completely given out.My father's silence kept replaying in my head, louder than anything Celeste actually said. I expected her outburst. I expected the accusation, the tears, the f
CelesteThe bottle on my nightstand had been half empty for three nights straight. I stopped bothering to hide it by the second night, too exhausted to perform the version of myself that kept everything contained behind a locked door and a controlled expression.Nothing was working anymore.The seduction narrative landed some damage. I could hear it in the way conversations went quiet when I walked into certain rooms, but it hadn't produced the collapse I needed. Cheryl kept showing up to class. She kept filming practices. She kept walking across campus with Carlson's hand at the small of her back like the rumors were something happening to somebody else entirely.I missed two classes this week. I couldn't remember the last time I studied for anything. My grades were sliding in a way I would have found unthinkable a month ago, back when maintaining perfect optics was the only skill that ever mattered to me. My coach pulled me aside after practice to ask if something was wrong, and I s
CherylHis heartbeat was slower than mine, steady under my palm in a way that made the whole room feel quieter than it actually was. I lay there listening to it long after either of us said anything, trying to memorize the rhythm of it like it might disappear if I stopped paying attention.I spent two years writing versions of this in a journal I never meant anyone to find. They were elaborate fantasies built out of longing and desperation, every detail imagined and polished and completely wrong. The real thing didn't match a single page of it. It was nothing like the practiced, choreographed intimacy I invented out of loneliness.It was better. Messier, more honest, both of us reaching for something that had nothing to do with performance and everything to do with survival. It was two people terrified in different directions finding a few hours where the fear didn't win. I hadn't felt safe like this in longer than I could remember, not the fragile, conditional safety I learned to exp







