Haven? Laughable

Lina’s POV

I wanted to change.

Ever since I could remember, intimate contact with a man was absolute torture. Literally. My skin would break out in severe goosebumps, and my entire body would freeze up. It was an incredibly frustrating reaction, and it was the sole reason Princeton and I had broken up.

I had no idea why my body reacted that way, but I wanted to fix it so badly. I figured a change of environment might help. I thought coming to LA would allow me to find a therapist—a specialist, someone, anyone—who could help me figure it out.

In a twisted way, I found him instead. The devil.

"Why him?" I muttered, my hands tightening against the steering wheel.

The city lights spilling through the windshield blurred as my eyes filled with tears. But amid the blur, one thing remained completely sharp. Riven. His touch.

I ground my teeth together, shifting uncomfortably in the driver's seat. My little mission at the bar had ended in a disastrous way. I had found absolutely nothing about Riven's watch, but I had discovered something deeply unsettling about my own body.

It had reacted normally to his touch. His fingers against my neck had felt warm. For a cold-hearted bastard, he had melted my inside defenses with his hands.

"That didn't happen," I told myself, letting out a heavy sigh for the hundredth time.

I took one hand off the wheel and ran it through my hair. As the brown strands fell around my face, I wished they could veil what had just occurred. Hide it from reality entirely. I had gotten caught in that kind of position with my soon-to-be stepbrother.

"Fuck!" Enraged, I cursed out loud and slammed my fist against the steering wheel.

But that wasn't the only thing that got slammed.

A sudden, heavy thud echoed from the front bumper.

"Jesus!" My gasp caught in my throat. The noise came from outside, from the person I had just rammed into.

Oh, God.

I slammed on the brakes, threw the car into park, and scrambled out into the night air. The cool breeze didn't hit me nearly as hard as the sight in front of my headlights.

"I'm so sorry!" My shout pierced the silent parking lot. I ran forward, a wave of pure horror washing over me. I had just run over an old man.

I rushed toward him, but he was already pushing himself up from the asphalt.

"You're loud, young lady," he chuckled. His voice was remarkably calm, and his expression matched it. The moonlight caught his bald head and highlighted the gentle smile on his face. "And you barely hit me; you were driving so slow."

"I'm sorry!" I repeated, my chest heaving as I struggled to catch my breath. Worry made my pulse race, and fear made my hands shake.

I had almost seriously injured someone because I was completely distracted by thoughts of Riven. Screw that devil.

"It's fine. Now carry on, young one," the old man smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

The tension left my shoulders, and I managed to force a small smile in return. He gave me a brief nod, leaned on his cane, and began to walk away.

"I'm sorry once more, sir!" I called out after him.

He didn't look back, but he gave his cane a slight wave in the air to acknowledge me.

★

By the time I reached the Rykerthrone mansion, my bones felt incredibly heavy. It was as if Riven's fiery touch had burned them to ash, leaving my limbs weighted down.

"Enough, Lina," I muttered, dropping my head back against the car's headrest.

I needed to completely erase these intrusive memories. Honestly, erasing every single memory of Riven would be ideal. I couldn't allow this to happen again—neither the run-ins with Princeton nor Riven's touch. His warm, soft—

"Adelina!" I cried out to the empty car, slapping my hand against my forehead to cut off my own thoughts. I hit myself too hard, and a dull ache throbbed in my temples.

"Shit..." I winced, sitting up straight.

Okay. Today needed to end with sleep. A long, dreamless night of rest.

I chose to drive back to the mansion simply because the bed in my guest room was massive. I stepped out of the car and marched up the concrete stairs. By the grand double doors, a staff member stood waiting, ready to take my keys.

How bougie.

I handed the keys over and pushed the heavy door open.

"Where have you been?" Ma's voice hit my eardrums before I could even take a full step inside.

Great. I hadn't even cleared the entryway.

"College, Ma," I answered, not even bothering to hide the exhaustion and irritation in my voice. I just didn't have the energy.

"That's why you didn't pick up your calls?"

"Yes. I was a little busy trying to survive at a campus where someone just got their hands chopped off!" I snapped.

Our gazes locked. Ma's expression softened instantly, and I knew exactly what was coming next. Tears.

"Darling," Ma began, dropping her folded hands to her sides. "I was worried about you."

The long hem of her robe dragged across the polished marble as she stepped toward me. She was dragging this out, too.

"Ma, please."

"I almost went to the police, but Ryker stopped me—"

"Can you not?!" I lashed out, the anger boiling over. I felt completely triggered. Triggered by Mr. Rykerthrone's name, triggered by the existence of his psychotic son, and triggered by Ma's constant smothering. "I'm trying so hard to act mature about your marriage to another man while Dad's murder still hasn't even been solved!"

The words tore from my throat, raw and bitter. The moment they left my mouth, I didn't regret them.

My breath hitched as I stared at her. "You moved on too fast, Ma. I haven't."

My voice dropped to a harsh whisper. Ma's shoulders sagged, the grief reflecting on her face, but I couldn't stand to look at it. I turned right back around toward the exit.

"Lina..."

I didn't look back. I couldn't. My eyes stung with unshed tears, blurring my vision as I burst through the front doors. Down by the driveway, the staff member was just about to drive my car to the garage.

"Stop!" I called out, rushing down the steps.

I snatched my keys back from his hand and slid into the driver's seat. College couldn't be my sanctuary in this hell, and clearly, neither could this mansion. I was going to have to build my own safe haven. But first, I just needed a place to sleep.

I turned the ignition, threw the car into drive, and sped off into the night.