LOGINMaeve. Throughout the entire class, I was zoned out.I tried occasionally to pay attention, reminding myself that Nicholas was a very strict professor and I couldn't afford to keep getting distracted. But I just couldn't help it. My mind kept drifting away.Every now and then, Rue would nudge me."You're distracted. What's going on?"I'd force myself to focus for a few minutes, only to find my thoughts wandering again.Somehow, Nicholas wasn't even as strict as usual today. He seemed more focused on teaching, going through the lecture without picking on anyone or making unnecessary comments.But I barely took anything in.The moment the class ended, I packed my things and left with Rue.Once we got outside, Rue tapped my arm."What's happening, Maeve? You looked so distracted today. What has been going on with you lately?"I paused.I didn't know what to say. Of course, my friend would notice that something was wrong with me. I'd been acting strangely for a while now, and I couldn't
Nicholas. The moment I saw the tears in Maeve's eyes, I completely lost it.I had told myself I would keep my distance this time, but I kept relapsing.I wanted to give Maeve enough reasons to hate me and stay away from me. I thought if she hated me, it would be easier for both of us.But seeing her actually hate me was something I wasn't prepared for.It made my heart ache more than I wanted to admit.When she said she thought we were getting back to how we used to be, I felt it.I wanted that too.God, I wanted it.But I couldn't.It was for the best. Maeve and I were better off staying out of each other's lives. No matter how much I wanted to pretend otherwise, getting involved with her would only make things worse.Yet I kept ruining it.Every time I thought I was finally doing the right thing, I found myself making another stupid move, another small gesture that gave her hope when I knew I shouldn't and then she slapped me.I wasn't even angry.I just stood there, staring at her
Maeve. Throughout the lectures today, I was completely zoned out.My mind kept going back to Phillip and his threats.He sounded so serious about releasing the videos. Serious enough that I couldn't stop thinking about what would happen if he actually did it.My mind was in shambles.I couldn't concentrate on anything the lecturer was saying. The words kept blending together, and every few minutes, I'd realize I'd been staring at the same spot without actually hearing a thing.Rue occasionally nudged me with her elbow."Maeve."I blinked and looked at her.She frowned at me. "Are you even listening?"I forced a small smile and nodded.A few minutes later, she nudged me again."You better concentrate. Do you want to have another Professor Nicholas situation?"I almost groaned.I adjusted myself in my seat and tried to focus, but my mind kept drifting back to Phillip.We had three lectures that day, and by the time the last one ended, I was completely drained.I walked out of the lectu
Maeve. Phillip leaned closer and pointed at me, his voice dropping into a low, bitter whisper."You want to know why I'm doing this, Maeve?"I stared at him, too stunned to respond."I suggested an open relationship with you, and you rejected that offer. I never hated you, and I never said I wanted to break up with you. I was just confused at the moment."His jaw tightened."You know I liked you. You know I loved you. You know I wouldn't leave you for another person. And yet, the moment you caught me with someone, you walked away."I swallowed hard."And now I've cut all those people off. All of them. I came back to you, trying to make things better, and then you go behind my back."He shook his head, his eyes filled with anger."You've been with whatever professor or whoever you've been hooking up with, obviously. You lied to me, because that was what you showed me that day at the party I invited you to. That's what you did. That's what you did!"I stared at him, barely recognizing
Maeve. He paused and gently turned to me, looking so unbothered.Of course he did. Why would it bother him?"What are you talking about, Maeve?"I rolled my eyes. "Stop acting like you don't know what I'm talking about. What happened to you? Why do you always want to humiliate me at any given chance? What happened to the protective Nic I knew? Why do you hate me so much?" I asked, my voice shaking as tears formed in my eyes.I swear I wasn't going to cry."Maeve...""Stop. Fine! It is my fault for liking you a little too much, okay? It's my fault for thinking there could be something. It's my fault."By this time, the tears I'd spent so long holding back had made their way down my cheeks."I wouldn't throw myself at you anymore, okay? But I hope you would stop confusing me too! Stop messing with my feelings. Please!"I finally let out all my frustration, wiping away the little tear that escaped my eye.I picked up my bag and began running upstairs.I just wanted to get away from him
Maeve. Shit. It's all my fault!I stared at the untouched pasta on the dining table and then back at Nicholas, who was already striding away in frustration.I facepalmed myself, grabbing my shirt and pulling it on, my heart sinking.It was my stupid, silly, horny self.Nicholas had sounded genuinely annoyed this time.I had lost my appetite too.I swallowed hard and carried the meal back to the kitchen, throwing it away.I always ruin everything.I hissed under my breath and climbed back to my room.I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling as a tear slipped down my cheek.Nicholas doesn't want you. Accept that, Maeve, and get it into your thick skull.Maybe it's just fun for him to mess with my feelings.I heaved a deep breath.The little moment I had spent with him, where he felt like the old Nicholas again, came crashing down.I really thought we were getting back to how we used to be.I forced a smile.It was fun while it lasted.But Nicholas would always push me awaySunday passed







