“So instead of letting us know you weren’t dead, you’ve been shacking up with that dirty little puppet?”Nymiah. “I’m sorry,” I say, not even annoyed at having to explain myself. “We crash-landed on this planet across the galaxy and all communications were down. I had no way to get in touch until now.”“Excuses,” Edan teases, but I know I’m not the only one overjoyed to hear the other’s voice. “But I think there’s someone else you’re going to be a little more interested to talk to than the rest of us.”My brows furrow.“Nova.”And every emotion in me explodes. “Dad?”There are two beats and they’re the longest in the world as he gathers his voice. “I knew you’d make it through.”“You’re…you’re…” But even now, when I’m hearing his voice, I still can’t make myself say the words.“You saved me, Nova,” Dad says, his voice full of emotion.“Apparently, it took a bit for your Neron trick to work,” Edan says, “but about twenty minutes after you and that ship suddenly disap
“As far as I can tell, all the major connections to the core are intact,” I say, wiping sweat from my brow. I’ve been crawling around down in the belly of the ship for over an hour, tangled in the mechanical guts of this beast, double and triple checking that every critical connection between the ship and the core is still working. “There are some cracks to the interior of the hull, but so far, all the majorly important parts of this ship are still functioning.” “So we can fix whatever is broken?” Valen asks. He’s crouched on the floor of the mechanical room above me at the opening of the hatch, looking down into the tunnels I’m occupying. My eyes rise to meet his. I shake my head and shrug. “That’s the problem. I have no idea what’s broken. I can’t fix it if I don’t know what to fix.” He extends a hand to me and pulls me up and out of the tunnel, back onto the floor of the room with him. “We will figure it out,” he says, his tone reassuring. “There’s a reason Cyrillius sent half t
I crush the thought of him, trying to push away the image of his cut throat and all the blood pooling around him. I can’t. I just can’t process that right now. So I think about this ship. I think about its mechanisms. I think about the blueprints for every ship I’ve ever seen. I think about how I would design a ship like this if I were going to create my own. This is what you know, I tell myself. This is what you’re good at. Focus on what you know. With pipes and bolts and combustors flashing through my mind, I drift off to sleep. “Nova,” a soft voice says into my ear. Slowly, I blink, seeing the same eyes I was seeing just a moment ago. A little smile pulls on my lips. Valen smiles too, and my heart flutters. There isn’t another smile in the galaxy like Valen’s. “Come eat,” he says, extending a hand to help me up. I blink, slightly confused as my brain wakes and realizes Valen is actually here and isn’t going to fade away with the wind. I look around, re-orienting myself.
My body hasn’t had time to learn this planet’s schedule yet, but somehow I know it’s early in the morning when my eyes slide open. The blankets are pulled up to my chin. My body is relaxed and comfortable. It’s actually…nice. And I realize it’s because I have some degree of peace of mind. Right now, I’m not pretending to be someone or something I’m not. After weeks of hiding everything on Isroth, here, I don’t have to be anything. I’m just Nova. Across the space, just five feet away, I see Valen. He’s still asleep. He’s sprawled on his back but his head is angled toward me, giving me a full view of his face. He looks younger when he sleeps. I’ve done the math and figure he’s roughly five solars older than me. But he looks incredibly young in sleep. He could nearly pass for a teenager. His black eyelashes fan out over his cheeks. His lips are pink and soft. There aren’t any creases in his forehead, furrowed with concern. He just looks peaceful. And I have to wonder, what a dif
“It’s beautiful,” I say in wonder, shaking my head. “I still prefer Kaelea, but this comes in as a close second.” My eyes slide over to look at Valen. He looks straight ahead, holding a serious expression. But a small smile cracks in one corner of his mouth. I laugh, bumping his shoulder with mine, throwing him off balance. “You’re creating some unrealistic expectations, Valen Nero,” I say as I walk across the sand until the tips of my boots are touching the water. “I’m going to be disappointed by the time you actually take me to our planet.” My stomach knots as soon as I realize what I’ve just said. I stand stark still, my eyes freezing on one point on the water. Behind me, Valen is very still and very quiet, too. “I…” I scramble to make this better, to make things less awkward. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-” Valen’s hand slips into mine and I look up into his eyes. “No,” he says, shaking his head. “It…it feels right. We have seen our lives there, we’ve seen our family there. It
“I don’t know why I just said that, Nova,” Valen says, his eyes still wide and confused. “I…. I didn’t even mean to get out of the water. Suddenly, all I could think about was getting back on the ship and getting back in space. I…” His hand goes to his chest and I realize just how hard he’s breathing. “I have to get back to Isroth.” My stomach sinks and suddenly I’m so cold. I walk up the shore and out of the lake, my eyes fixed on Valen’s. When I reach him, I place my hands on either side of his head, keeping his gaze locked on me. “You do not have to go back. You are free. You’re here with me.” His eyes widen just a little more. “I can’t, Nova,” he says, his voice nearly a whisper. “I can’t stay here.” “This is what he did to you, Valen,” I say, staring into his eyes as if I can see down into his soul. “This isn’t you. This is his Kinduri. This is what he’s used against you, for solars.” Valen drops his boots in the sand and brings his hands up to cover mine. He squeezes his eye
“Valen,” I say in a breath. I step into the room and he watches me as I approach. I reach a hand forward, gently touching the big scar that runs up his front. He grabs my wrist, bringing my hand up to his chest, laying it flat against his skin, over his heart. He holds his hand over my own. “One by one, these scars made me who I am.” There’s a dark tone to his voice that I don’t like, don’t want to be there. “Whether Cyrillius made me this way or not, these parts of me are who I am. The past doesn’t disappear. This…everything in front of us is going to be hard. Maybe impossible. Are you sure I’m worth it, Nova?” My eyes rise up to his and I let his words sink into me. I let them fill my heart, my stomach, my eyes. “That’s what we’re here for, Valen,” I answer him. “That’s why we crashed on this planet. To discover the answer to that question. But you’re a human being. No one deserves what he’s put you through all this time. I would do this for anyone.” I see the expression in Vale
There’s a bitter taste on my tongue when I wake. Like copper and silt and vinegar. I blink my eyes open, searching the space. There are no signs of Valen. As I sit up, my stomach is in knots. My heart is heavy. I don’t know what I was expecting. I always think I’m more capable than I am. Maybe I thought I’d go into Valen’s mind and it would be easy to undo what Cyrillius did. Which was so slam stupid. The Kinduri have been manipulating him for solars. They’ve built up layers and layers of darkness. But I’m still crushed. I’m still shaking with the weight of what I saw in Valen’s mind. Get over it, I try to tell myself. I retrieve my uniform from the washroom and pull it on. There are no signs of Valen in the ship and when I get to the Command Deck, I find the hatch open. Looking for a few more moments of solitude, I step out of the ship and scale it. I climb the slick surface until I settle on top of the core, letting its warm, swirling mass warm me from beneath. It’s cool o