Chapter 9: The Little Mouse's Confession

My eyelids fluttered open, the bright light stinging my eyes. I clenched them shut, adjusting my vision to the light before prying them open again.

Two sets of familiar eyes bore into mine and my heart skipped a beat, heat coursing through my body. I pressed my lips into a thin line to stop the scream lodging in my throat. Both of them raised a questioning brow at me before straightening their back,

Kai folded his arms over his chest and stared at me, his violet eyes glistening under the bright lights.

“Took you long enough to wake up.” A hint of irritation fillef his tone but I’m too distracted by the bulging muscles of his arms to care.

“I—sorry.” I apologized, tearing my gaze away from him.

“For what? Taking too long to open your eyes, trying to find the easiest route to escape or…” He narrowed his gaze on me, sending chills down my spine.

“…..trying to kill yourself? Which one is it, little mouse?”

My cheeks reddened with embarrassment and I lowered my gaze, suddenly felling ashamed of myself. No one was supposed to find out that I tried to poison myself. It could have been easier for me to just die and no one would notice. Yet, my mates found out in just matter of seconds.

It felt like I was truly doomed for eternity and even death seemed to hold grudges with me.

“Well, she could be apologizing for all of them.” Kian’s soft voice sang through the air.

I looked up at him, watching his lips pull into a devious smirk as he walks to the end of the room and plop down on one of the couches.

“It’s too bad we don’t take apology in words, but in kind.” He added, flicking his fingers as though he’s summoning the unknown.

“Is that so?” Kai spoke again, a dangerous edge in his voice this time.

“No. I’m only apologizing for what I did which I’m not exactly sorry about.” I responded with defiance, shocked at my own bravery.

The room stillef for a second and just when I thought he was about to make a move at me, he clicked his tongue over the roof of his mouth and unfolded his hands from his chest, sliding them into his pockets.

My mouth almost watered at the heavenly sight, my wold howling in my head as I resist the prickling urge to reach out and touch him. Since I met them, I’ve had this primal urge to hold them and merge my body together as one with theirs. Yet, I knew that I couldn’t be that forward just yet. Even though they haven’t rejected me, it still wasn’t enough for me to not be wary about them.

“I didn’t take you for one who would have a sharp mouth.”

I nearly smacked myself in the face for a second, wondering what came over me. Being sharp mouthed with two Alphas who could snuff the life out of me was useless especially since I was already at their mercy. Kian didn’t seem to mind about whether or not I wanted to die but it looked like Kai didn’t share his sentiments.

From the way he was glaring at me, I could already feel his rage trying to get the best of him and that wouldn’t do me any good, so I did what I thought was best.

“I’m really sorry.”

“How about you stop apologizing and tell me why you’re trying to end your own life? Was that another strategy for you to escape us?” He raised a brow.

I shook my head frantically, gulping nervously as I thought about a pleasant lie to give. It’s not like they won’t find out anyways, but it was easier to try than to just admit the truth. At least that’s what I thought.

“I wasn’t—“

He put up a finger to interrupt me. “Whatever you’re about to say, don’t. I already know you’re lying.”

Kian snickered and Kai rolled his eyes at him before returning his gaze back to me. I bit down on the corner of my lips and tried to look away but his violet eyes sucked me in, making it impossible for me to do so.

“The healer told us you tried to poison yourself and the only reason you’re not dead right now is because we were there to help you. Now tell me, little mouse….” He slurred, leaning against the bed side table on my left.

His scent wafted into my nostrils and I instinctively sniffed it in, closing my eyes briefly as warmth spread through me in comfort.

“Why you’d choose to die? Is it because you do not want us?”

What?

“No, that’s not it. I want…you both.” I whispered to myself, hoping he didn’t hear it but it was no use. He would.

It’s laughable that he’d think I didn’t want them when in reality, I was scared that they wouldn’t want me. I’m still recovering from the shock that they still haven’t rejected me yet and I’m dreading the time until they do. I’m hard to want anyways.

A large hand landed on my head in a soft pat, brushing my hair away from my face gently before tilting my chin up with his index finger to look into my eyes. My lower abdomen tightened with heat as he gazed at me softly, his expression switching between blankness and care.

“What’s wrong?”

I opened my mouth to respond but all that came out was a small whimper as I thought about how my life has taken another course witching the past few days. Everyday came with a worse scenario than the last, and I didn’t know how much longer I could go before I gave up.

“Yes, little mouse. Tell us.” Kian chirped in, folding his leg over the other.

Ellen’s lifeless body flashed in my vision and tears stung my eyes, fear creeping up my spine in horror. She was dead because of me. The only person who saw me as a human and didn’t treat me like garbage was dead and it was all my fault.

My temples thudded with a headache, regret pulling at my heart strings. Kai caressed my cheek with the pad of his thumb, bringing my attention back to him again. A tear fell from my eye and I wiped it away furiously, pulling my trembling lip in between my teeth.

“The person I lived with was killed by an assasin and it’s all because of me.” The words left my lips before I could even stop myself, tears already flowing freely from my eyes.

Kian straightened in his seat, the smug grin on his face vanishing immediately. Kai doesn’t stop caressing my cheek, he moved closer to me until he was sitting at the edge of the bed, his other hand coming around to rest on my other hand.

I flinched at his warm touch but he grabbed my hand to keep me in place before I could move away.

“Your fault?” Kian asked.

I nod. “Yes. She was killed all because she took me in. I can’t live with this guilt. It’s eating me alive.” I sobbed, bringing a hand up to cover my mouth.

The room was silent for a while with only my muffled sobs filling the air. After some seconds, I swallowed back the rest of my tears before looking back up at Kai who I was staring at me with an unreadable expression on his face.

“How do you know it was because of you? Do you know who they are?” Kian questioned.

Exhaling deeply, I nodded in resignation, running my fingers through my hair. Kai’s grip around my thigh tightened, annoyance flickering through his eyes. I winced from the dull ache and he quickly pulled his hand away, pushing his fingers into his hair instead and muttering under his breath.

“I couldn’t see their face but I know they were sent from my pack. I was able to see their crest before I could get away from them. They—they tried to kill me too.”

“What?” Both of them mouthed in unison, their eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

“Yes. I was their target but fortunately for me, they hadn’t been able to find me a before I could escape. Unfortunately though, they found Ellen instead and….” My throat clogged up and I gulped, unable to complete the rest of my sentence.

“Why would your pack send someone to kill you? Why are they after you?” Kai finally spoke, his voice deeper than usual.

I paused, my eyes darting between the both of them as I debated if it was a good idea. They both seemed genuinely although Kai’s lips was twisted into a deep frown as he waited for me to respond. Kian stood up from the couch and walked over to us. Although he was blind, I’ve never seen someone who moved around as swiftly as he did.

“Because I’m a disgrace to the pack.”