Henrick shook her by the shoulders and laughed, “That will be the day,” clearly not believing her. Then he became serious again and said, “Seriously, Estel, when you first came to work here, you were a little prudish, but you weren't as tight as a clam.” Even after Estel's immediate reversion to cold hostility, he said, “You didn't grow with him, Estel. I can't help but think Peter wasn't good for you.” He said this with a cautious look in his eyes, indicating that he knew he was treading on dangerous ground. He put you in an academic bubble where the outside world was rarely allowed in, and I saw you become more and more narrow-minded as he did. “A poet is supposed to expand people's horizons, not narrow them!” he interrupted the inevitable rejoinder. “Do yourself a favor and reread Peter's poetry, Estel. I think you'll understand what I mean if you still have any sense of objectivity in this situation regarding him.” Estel shot him a cold look, trying desperately not to say something
Lars and Anne Pederson arrived 30 minutes after Estel had bathed Angela and put her in bed so that Dr. Jill could examine her, and it took another half an hour before she could take a shower. Guests agreed it was for the best to leave the house alone after Dr. Jill announced at dinner that it appeared Angela had measles. Lars and Annie were distressed, never having had to go through such an illness with one of their children before, and everyone agreed that they didn't need guests at a time like that. A friendly neighbor couple offered Estel a ride home, and it wasn't until she was about to leave that she realized she and Dr. Jill had never in-depth discussed her health. He walked up to her as she was about to head out the door, having concluded that she would just phone him anytime over the next week to arrange an appointment. His remarks comforted her that he would be a great doctor to have if she hadn't already formed that view. As his full attention shifted to her, he said, "I'm
Estel's secret torment following the abortion lasted for months, although no one except her knew about it. Some of her coworkers and friends were happy with the transformation, especially Henrick Larsen. Still, most people just noticed a little difference from the previous Estel. The new Estel gave him a lot of pleasure since she was tougher, less idealistic, and willing to take on tasks that before would have upset her. If he had known that she had adopted her current stance because she now cared less about her external circumstances, he could have had cause for concern. On the inside, her suffering was all-consuming. The feelings of remorse and doubt began soon after she got home from the hospital. She was weaker than she had anticipated after the abortion. Still, she knew that this was due more to emotional shock than to any actual physical weakness. She had taken off work for a whole week and spent much of it sitting in Central Park, looking sightlessly at the world around her. Th
Estel gazed at him warily, recalling with a start, why she had gone in there in the first place. Had she messed up their relationship by being so open with her emotions? What he must have seen in her eyes, he must have been waiting for her to verbalize. She licked her parched lips, attempting to gather her wits and come up with anything to save her scheme. She scolded herself for letting herself get emotionally invested so quickly in Michael. She may have just messed up the whole affair! "I, I, can wait," she stuttered, hesitating to the door. "I'm sorry to have interrupted you, Henrick." Without meeting the elder man's eyes, she profusely expressed her regrets. When Michael's voice prompted her to turn, she stretched out with a trembling hand to grasp the doorknob. He responded, "Wait a moment, Estel," seeming calmly insistent. She stopped, lowering her head in case there was still evidence of what she had felt for him to see. Michael turned to Henrick, and his voice was calmly ha
She spent the entire afternoon fretting over how she would reconnect with Michael and needed help to get much work done. It had to be done so gently that he didn't guess she had managed things. She might be able to innocently wait for him in the corridor outside of Henrick's office. The problem, however, was that she had yet to learn when he would go. She also dared only keep prancing the hall regularly all afternoon once the proper opportunity came. She could miss him. Then her thoughts turned to a novel she'd wanted to show Henrick. She might reach out to Henrick's assistant, Jennie, and have her give her a call when it appears that the meeting between Henrick and Michael has concluded. If she acted as though it were an emergency, she could reach him before he departed. When Henrick had company, they would always say their goodbyes awkwardly while he waited in the doorway. She had reached for the phone to dial Jennie when Henrick stormed into her office, bare teeth gnashing togethe
As the plane touched down in Aspen, Colorado, Estel couldn't help but feel a flurry of excitement, despite her worries about whether or not she was making the right decision. Since she had never been here before, the experience broadened her perspective on the world. Estel anxiously anticipated Michael's arrival and wondered if he would pick her up. The amount of luggage she had to bring for several months made her resentful, and she thought it was the least he could do to provide her with private transportation to his home. On the other hand, he had been annoyingly evasive about the details of this partnership up to that point. At Henrick's urging, she had rushed into subletting her apartment. Then, she had to keep the new tenants waiting for an entire week while she fidgeted in her office because Michael was slow to confirm the sublet. Just when she had been about to walk out on the whole venture, an envelope had appeared on her desk one afternoon containing a one-way ticket to Asp
Estel was unwilling to accept Michael's generosity at face value, so she sought an explanation. She asked, "On a whim, how many people live in your family?" "Just Dad, Mom, and me," Mandy clarified. "Dad takes care of the grounds and the cars." I help with Mom's cooking and cleaning when I'm home from school. Michael helped me get a scholarship and insisted my parents save the money we had built up in our old home's equity for their old age. We don't have to pay for food or lodging; our parents are employed. Estel blinked, scowling at her inability to fault Michael's conduct. She consoled herself by thinking he was probably a slave driver. Mandy apparently wasn't around enough to see it. She was obviously so infatuated with Michael that she would excuse him anything. Estel's interest in the landscape was renewed as they descended into the roaring Fork River. She caught glimpses of the clear water through the trees before it was fully revealed in all its beauty. She exclaimed to h
After a short nap, Estela warily left her room at around 7 o'clock. As she walked by the dining room, she could make out muffled conversations coming from what she thought to be the kitchen. But as she reached the living room, it was deserted, and she realized she had stopped breathing in preparation for meeting Michael face-to-face, so she took a long breath to fill her lungs. This won't do, she informed herself with a chiding grimness. She can't give off any vibes of nervousness with Michael right from the bat. She aimed to portray an image of confidence and competence. For her goals to materialize, Michael needed to have faith in her competence as a professional. She drew nearer to the fire, appreciating the coziness and closeness it brought. While browsing the mantel, she saw there were no writing-related memories displayed, which made her a little bit irritated. Nothing suggests that Michael was a famous author who felt compelled to advertise his status. Instead, there were beau