PAIN AND DETERMINATION

ANYA

I ran deeper into the forest, forcing back my tears, forcing down my wolf. I masked my scent so no one could find me. The thought of escaping to the city and pretending to be human crossed my mind, but I knew it wasn’t possible. That life wasn’t mine. All I could do now was find another pack, far from my pack, far from my family, and begin again.

Hours passed before I stumbled upon a waterfall. Its silver curtain of water glimmered in the moonlight, soft and inviting. My legs ached, my body weary, so I laid my blanket on the grass, set my bag aside, and slipped into the cold pool beneath the falls. The icy water stung, but it washed away the dirt, the sweat, and some of the shame clinging to me.

When I dressed again, I lay back on my blanket, staring up at the sky. “Is this what I’ve become?” I whispered. “A runaway… soon to be branded rogue if I don’t find a pack fast enough. The Moon Goddess gave me a mate only to take him away. Why?” My words faded into the night, carried by the sound of the rushing water. Eventually, exhaustion pulled me into sleep.

When I awoke, dawn had painted the forest in gold, but the pain of Rafael’s rejection still burned through my chest like fresh fire. Slowly, I rose and went to the stream.

The water reflected my face back at me. For so long, I had heard the same word whispered behind my back, spat at me openly, ugly. And now, staring at my reflection, I could almost see what they saw.

My eyes, though deep brown, seemed too plain, too ordinary. Freckles dotted my nose and cheeks, scattered like stains across my skin. My eyebrows were thick and untamed, unlike Juliana’s perfectly shaped ones. My lips were full but lacked color, my jawline soft instead of sharp.

I touched my face, my chest tightening. “Is it my nose? My eyes? Or is it everything?”

Every flaw I had been told about stared back at me through the rippling water. I could almost hear their voices again — the cruel laughter, the disgust in Rafael’s tone when he said I wasn’t good enough, when he chose to reject me.

My throat ached as I looked away, unable to face the girl in the water any longer.

The words escaped me before I could stop them, soft and broken.

“Moon Goddess… if you hear me, if you truly see me… then please, don’t let this be the end of me. Don’t let Rafael’s rejection be the last thing that defines me. If I was meant to be cursed with this face, this body, then give me something else. Give me a chance… give me a reason to keep walking.”

My voice cracked on the last word, but I refused to cry again. Not for Rafael. Not for Juliana. Not for anyone.

I took a deep breath, shouldered my bag, and turned from the waterfall. My steps were heavy, but I forced them forward. The forest stretched endlessly before me, and though fear curled in my stomach, a small spark of determination had begun to burn.

If I had to walk until my feet bled, I would. If I had to fight rogues, I would. If I had to wander for days without food or water, I would.

Because I would not crawl back to Thornveil. I would not kneel before Rafael. And I would not let Juliana’s shadow swallow me whole.

I didn’t know where I was going, but I knew I couldn’t stop. Somewhere out there was a new beginning. And I was going to find it.

The days bled into each other. I walked until my feet ached, slept under trees, drank from streams, and ate whatever berries I could find. My body grew weaker, but the pain in my chest was worse than the hunger. The mark of rejection lingered like a wound that refused to heal.

Sometimes, I caught my reflection in rivers or puddles as I passed. Each time, I flinched. The girl staring back at me looked tired, broken, her tangled hair clinging to her cheeks, her skin pale from exhaustion. The freckles across my nose stood out harshly, my thick eyebrows unkempt, my lips dry and cracked. I could almost hear their voices again: Ugly. Worthless. Not enough.

I shook my head and kept walking. I had to survive. I had to keep moving.

But fate was cruel.

It was the fourth night when I sensed danger, too late. Shadows moved in the trees, fast, skilled. Rogues. Their howls echoed, chilling the forest. Before I could shift, sharp claws raked across my arm, and a blow to my side sent me crashing into the dirt.

I fought back, but I was already too weak, my wolf still hurting from Rafael’s rejection. Their snarls surrounded me, their laughter cruel, their teeth flashing under the moonlight.

I tried to run, but another claw slashed across my back. My vision blurred, hot blood dripping down my skin. The pain was unbearable, my wolf whimpering inside me.

Then, everything went black.