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20 Fantasy becomes reality
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SENSUAL SURRENDER 21. I'll go to the grave loving you
"Nelly, my fingers hurt,” I complained as I worked on the last cornrow. “Your hair's just too damn long."Plaiting Nelly’s hair was usually a challenge, because it was too soft and silky to grasp from his scalp. And then there was the length—around fourteen inches of hair. I wasn't sure why he liked his hair plaited, anyway. Maybe it made him appear tougher and more street? Or maybe he just liked having my hands in his hair."You don't like my hair long? You wanna cut it?" Nelly asked, always ready to please me even when my complaints were trivial. He made me feel as though he lived and breathed only for me."But then you'd lose all your strength and beauty, my dear Samson," I teased. "I'm no Delilah, I could never do that to you.""So you like it then?""Of course I do. It just takes a hell of a long time to plait," I said. "It's my fingers that protest."Nelly was sitting cross-legged on a thick red blanket while I knelt behind him grooming his hair. We were at our favorite spot—un
SENSUAL SURRENDER 22. Awakening my love
Someone was shaking me awake. I reluctantly opened my eyes and was staring right into Josh’s. Again. He was on his side, propped up on one elbow.Something was tickling my cheeks. Tears. I was crying. I was crying in my sleep?"Sorry to wake you, but you were crying so hard I couldn't…" Josh tried to smile but a torn expression marred his features."It's okay,” I whispered. “Thanks for waking me.""Was it a bad dream?" I closed my eyes and tried to remember what my dream was about. There were flashes of the neighborhood I grew up in, the giant oak tree I used to sketch under, the park…there was this person, hugging me, but his face was obscured. The flickers were quick, I had them, and then they were gone. Zilch. "No.""Wanna tell me about it?""I-I can’t remember any of it, Josh."With a sigh, he flopped back on the bed, eyes on the ceiling. "You were dreaming about Nelly again," he said. "Saying his name over and over. Saying you loved him." He looked pained, as though whatever I'
SENSUAL SURRENDER 23. Present turned to past
“Tell me his name, Dalia," Michael demanded when I entered his car and he saw my face. My tears ran freely. “Tell me the asshole’s name!”"Chill, Michael.”Michael craned his neck to glare up at the skyscraper building through his windshield. "What did rich boy do? Say the word, Dalia. Say the word and I’ll deliver his head to you John the Baptist style.”"Michael, I promise you, I'm good," I tried to defuse him. "He didn't do anything to me.I just...needed space and snuck out. That’s all."He didn’t believe me. It was obvious. "Y’sure?""Yes." I added a nod with the word for emphasis. "Is Julia at your place?"Michael finally pulled away from the curb. At this ungodly hour, the roads were dark and unpopulated. "Yeah. Been there all week.""And you're out swindling?""Have to make that green, baby girl," he said through his sexy Hispanic accent. His basketball cap barely sat on the side of his head."I'm gonna sleep at your house tonight then. But stop at my apartment first so I can
SENSUAL SURRENDER 24. Dangerously in love with you
"I still think we should wait, Dalia. We don't have to do this.”Determined, I yanked Nelly’s arm, pulling him in the direction of his bedroom in his rented flat. To which I held the keys, considering he was only there on weekends. During the week, it was mine to do with as I pleased. My second home. "I know. But I want to.”Nelly inhaled, closed his eyes. When he opened them again, they were blazing with lust, his tenuous reservation unraveled. Cupping my face, he plunged his tongue into my mouth, taking what was willingly his. Our tongues tangled in a sensuous dance.Never breaking, he moved across the bedroom threshold and kicked the door shut. Then the kiss got deeper, more desperate, as he took small steps forward, forcing me backwards until I felt the bed behind me. I toppled backward, and he fell with me, our lips never parting.I love him so much.When he finally parted ways with my lips, we were both panting, breathing ragged."On one condition.""What?" I rasped. "Anything."
SENSUAL SURRENDER 25. The worst nightmare
Later that night, I woke up alone.Mild stings from various parts of my body reminded me of our passionate exertions. My neck—the love bites. Between my legs—my lost virginity. My lips—from endless kissing and lip biting.Where’d Nelly gone off to?I lazily swung out of bed, searching the apartment. No Nelly. But I could hear the rowdy jeers of boys outside, and knew his crew was under The Big Tree out in the yard smoking marijuana and talking about girls and guns as usual.Yeah, I get that they were his boys and all that, but were they really more important than me right now?Snatching up my cell phone, I sent him a text.Baby, I'm awake.I need more.Please come back inside. Love you.The bed sheets were stained with blood from my broken hymen, so I changed them and grabbed a quick shower, then slid back into bed, waiting.Half-an-hour later, Nelly still wasn’t back, neither did he respond to my text. Then it was an hour. An hour and a half.No Nelly.But I could still hear the bois
SENSUAL SURRENDER 26. I will not cry
Geo Lee was a joy to work with. He was bubbly, charismatic, jocular and gay— occupying both significances of the double entendre. I'd left Michael's house a sapping mess that morning but was instantly invigorated once I stepped through the doors of GLFH.I was in my zone there, around an immense oak table in an all-glass room choosing fabrics and patterns for an upcoming fashion show. Geo Lee was crazy about a few of my designs and decided to model them in his show. Even though my designs would be carrying his name, I was thrilled and honored that I could actually wow a fashion icon like Geo Lee.Kiwan, an Asian beauty with jet black, bobbed hair and small squinted eyes, was nodding furiously at Geo Lee's rapid words. She was an accessory designer—a hell of an accessory designer, actually. But she seemed overwhelmed by Geo Lee's new requirements.It appeared he'd canceled his previous ideas for the Fashion Show and was now taking a completely different turn on a very slim timeline. A
SENSUAL SURRENDER 27. Because I still love him
"Dalia."Soft hands coaxed me from the comforting darkness of sleep.Julia."I brought you some soup." I blinked at her sitting at the side of the bed. "You’ve got to be hungry, Dalia. You came home with a Burger King meal and it’s still untouched."Rubbing the blurriness from my sleepy eyes, I sat up. "What time is it?""Around nine. Here, eat something." She carefully set the tray on my lap. A big, red bowl of delectable gumbo. Julia was a consummate cook—not at all congruous with her 'spoiled girl' personality. But it was a trait inherited from her mother, Mrs. Mitchell, who was master in the kitchen.My stomach grumbled in reply as the aroma rose to my nostrils. "Thanks, Julia.You’re right. I'm famished."I took a spoonful of gumbo to my mouth, and as always, preparations by Julia's hands were delicious."So, how was your first day at work?""Fun." I managed a smile. "Geo Lee’s all work, no play, and no lunch breaks."Julia had a horrified expression. "And that's fun?"I laughed.
SENSUAL SURRENDER 28. Josh was leaving me....again
It was day number four for me at GLFH.Day number five since I'd last seen Josh.He’d called, texted, emailed. Repeatedly. And I’d continued to ignore and delete.As promised, he never showed up on my doorstep. But there were times when I wished he would show up.My eschewing him only served to make me crave and think of him more, not less. He was constantly on my mind, the second I woke up in the mornings, and before I closed my eyes at night. Even in my dreams/memories, he was there.My new job helped. Geo Lee did a fine job at keeping my mind occupied. So I craved work hours."I think he's trying to kill us," Kiwan whispered across the table. "My God, I'm starving."I tried not to giggle, but it couldn’t be helped, and we both giggled, causing Geo Lee to eyeball us suspiciously from the far end of the room where he was on a telephone call, chatting at bullet speed about models and runways.Kiwan was warm and cordial and we worked well together. She wasn't a fan of elaborate designs
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- SENSUAL SURRENDER 45. I detonated
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