ONE

Yet another scream rippled through my throat as I felt the yet another unimaginable pain, I felt as though I would lose my mind if it didn’t stop, I felt as though my life would drain from me slowly but surely.

“Just a little bit more, Alexa. Push”. The voices were suddenly unclear and distant; like voices talking in an empty glass room, the bass and echoes, it all sounded so far.

Was I fading out? Was I drifting off? Would this be how I die?

“I think she’s slipping. Do something!”.

“Alexa? Alexa can you hear me? Think about your baby, she’s almost out”.

My baby…..

“Push Alexa”.

My baby, my dear, dear child. The thought of her suddenly had a bolt of energy surging through my veins, and with my borrowed strength I pushed once more, pushed till I felt a sudden emptiness, till I heard the soft cries of a baby, the cries I’ve so desperately wanted to hear for a long, long time.

“She’s out! She’s out!”.

And that was it, I drifted off.

~~

Beep….beep….beep….

I woke up to a dull pain in my abdomen, one which had ne stirring uncomfortably. My body was weak and extremely drained out, and I felt an inexplicable cold grip me and all I could do was lie there and try to pull my thoughts together.

Where was I?

The constant beeping sounds told me I was still at the hospital. It was quiet here and I thought was alone, not until I heard someone say my name.

“Alexa?”.

It took me a moment to realize that it was April; my….friend? The relationship between April and I was rather peculiar, she was typically that girl who bitched on everyone when she wanted, me included, but she was always that girl that turned up whenever you were in need of help or something.

“Are you awake?”. She asked.

And it was only then I let my eyes flutter open weakly. I squinted from the light that suddenly stung my eyes, and it took me a moment to adjust to the brightness of the room.

“She’s awake”. I heard her say to someone.

Wasn’t she the only one here?

I blinked a couple of times before letting my gaze travel around the room. I sighted April walking towards me with a long face, which was unlikely because she always had a sneer on. And then I sighted Micheal, her husband, and my husband’s best friend, standing by the door carrying the exact same expression as April, and though I felt my heart beat a little faster from seeing him, I could get rid of the unease and anxiety that had suddenly settled over me.

“What’s wrong?”. I asked quietly, weakly.

April was at my side now and she gently took my hand in hers.

“I’m sorry, Alexa”. She said quietly.

What? Why?

I tried pulling myself up to a sitting position but found I was too weak to do so, I saw Micheal attempt to come to me but he reconsidered and stood still.

“What’s wrong?”. I asked again.

And it was then it clicked….

“My baby”. I breathed. “Where’s she?”.

“I am so sorry”. Was all April said.

Her striking blue eyes had never seemed so saddened and disheartened, I couldn’t bear to keep looking into them so I turned to face Micheal instead.

“Where’s my baby?”. I asked quietly.

He said nothing for a while, just stood there staring at me with those eyes, those dark and captivating eyes that I always found comfort in.

My heart was beginning to beat faster and harder now and my stomach kept clenching with unease, I didn’t want to think…..it couldn’t be.

“Where’s my baby?”. I was crying now.

He let out a heavy breath before walking up to me, his gaze never left mine and I found myself unable to breathe. He lowered himself beside April and I stared at them with teary eyes.

“I’m sorry Alexa, she’s gone”. He said to me.

I couldn’t believe it, I couldn’t believe that my baby was gone.

“No”. I breathed.

I damned the pain and weakness as I begun dragging myself up.

“You’re going to hurt yourself Alexa, stay down”. April said to me.

Of course I wasn’t going to listen to her, I wasn’t going to listen to anyone. I felt my throat constrict painfully and I began to sob.

“No, please”. I cried quietly. ”She can’t be gone, please”.

I felt April squeeze my hand reassuringly. I wasn’t going tojust accept that my baby was gone, that all the wait and the pain had been for nothing, that all the dreams and fantasies were all for nothing, I couldn’t accept that.

“Calm down”. Micheal said, but I shook my head.

How could I calm down? I felt like I was losing my mind.

“Where is she? Where’s my baby?”. I cried.

I pulled my hand from April’s before pushing the covers of my body, I wasted no time in climbing off the bed. I felt my head throb painfully as the room seemed to revolve around me, I felt my legs wobble and I felt the stinging pain in between. I clutched my stomach as the dull pain intensified, I felt as though I would crumble at any time but I didn’t care, I needed to see my baby.

“Alexa, Alexa!”. April called my name alarmingly.

I didn’t listen, and I headed towards the door as quickly as my weakened body would let me.

“Alexa stop”. I heard Micheal say just as he grabbed my arm from behind.

He tried holding onto me but I wriggled and struggled till he let go of me, he probably feared he’d break me if we kept the struggle up.

“Alexa!”.

I didn’t look back, I didn’t even look ahead, my vision had become blurry and I could barely see a thing, I just kept running till I could run no more, till my legs gave out on me and till I fell forward, I readied myself for the impact that never came, rather, I felt strong arms wrap around me just as i fell against a hard but warm surface.