Chapter 3

When I came to in a hospital bed, Joshua was nowhere in sight.

A doctor stood beside me, frowning down at my chart.

"Where's your family?" he asked.

I shook my head weakly. Without another word, he moved on to the next bed.

A young couple was in the bed next to mine. The woman kept nagging the man, mostly scolding him for being careless, but the love in her eyes was pure.

It was the same way I used to look at Joshua.

My phone buzzed on the nightstand, one anonymous text after another. Every single message contained photos of Joshua and Tina getting matching tattoos, bungee jumping, praying at a church, and watching the northern lights.

Joshua had been right. With Tina, he was happier than before.

"Ms. Jensen, being young really does have its advantages, wouldn't you agree?"

The provocative undertone in Tina's message left me with no way to argue back.

…

It wasn't until my third day in the hospital that Joshua finally showed up.

He sat down by my bedside and looked at me, seeming hesitant to speak.

"Tina's young. She doesn't know any better. Don't hold it against her."

The very first thing out of his mouth was said in her defense. Numb as my heart was, it still gave a dull throb.

"Does it still hurt?"

He took my hand, as if trying to figure out how to explain himself. "I forgot you can't drink. But you knew, and you did it anyway. Were you deliberately trying to make yourself suffer?"

My silence made him realize he'd said the wrong thing. Irritated, he ran a hand through his hair. The movement inadvertently exposed red marks on his neck.

In the end, he seemed to deflate. "I'm sorry."

I pulled my hand back and looked away. A heavy silence settled over the room.

For a while after that, Joshua became a different man. Maybe it was guilt, or maybe his conscience had finally caught up with him.

He barely left my bedside for the rest of my stay. He made sure I took my medicine and personally made me congee that was easy on my stomach.

It felt as though everything had gone back to the way it used to be.

The Ford family had once suffered a major setback, and Joshua lost everything overnight. His parents fell deeply into debt, and unable to repay it, they both took their own lives at home.

I found him just as he was about to slit his wrists. Thankfully, he survived, and from that day on, I swore I'd protect him.

During our worst years, the two of us stayed in a ten-dollar-a-night motel and shared a single pot of instant noodles.

Knowing how exhausting it was for me to deliver food for a living, he'd hide the only fried egg at the bottom of the noodles for me.

Back then, getting sick was what we feared most, because sickness meant medical bills we couldn't pay and medicine we couldn't afford.

He used to look through the motel's rusty window at the traffic and the high-rises outside.

"Elise, we have to get out of this place."

He said that more often than anything else. In the end, we did get out.

However, he had changed, too.

That night, the dim yellow light over my bed flickered. Joshua sat drowsily in the chair beside me, and I stared at him almost greedily before finally looking away.

No matter what, he'd changed. He wouldn't stay on his best behavior for more than a few days. His heart had left me long ago.

Sure enough, a single call from Tina woke him. Without saying a word to me, he grabbed his coat and hurried out of the room.