The price of staying alive

By midday, my hands were raw, I'd washed dishes for three hours straight. Mountains of them. Plates, bowls, cups, pots. The water was scalding hot and Mara didn't believe in breaks.

"Faster," she barked from across the kitchen. "Lunch prep starts in twenty minutes and I need those pots."

I scrubbed harder, ignoring the burning in my palms.

Other kitchen workers moved around me. They were three women and two men. All rogues but none of them spoke to me. They just worked, efficient and silent.

I finished the last pot and set it on the drying rack.

"Good," Mara said. "Now chop the vegetables over there."

She pointed to a table covered in carrots, onions, and potatoes. A knife lay beside them.

I walked over and started chopping. My hands were shaking from exhaustion but I didn't stop.

The door to the kitchen swung open.

Lila walked in.

She looked perfect with her hair pulled back.

She smiled at Mara like they were old friends.

"Morning, Mara. Smells good in here."

"Always does," Mara replied. "You here for food or gossip?"

"Both." Lila's eyes found me. "I see you put the new girl to work."

"Ryder's orders."

"Of course." Lila walked over to where I was chopping and leaned against the table. "How are you settling in, Vada?"

I didn't look up. "Fine."

"That's good. Kitchen work suits you. Simple, mindless and perfect for someone like you."

One of the other kitchen workers snorted.

I kept chopping.

Lila picked up a carrot slice and examined it. "You know, Ryder used to bring me breakfast in bed. Before you showed up. We'd spend mornings together. Talking. Planning. Other things."

My jaw tightened but I didn't respond.

"Now he's too busy dealing with you. The mate bond. The complications." She dropped the carrot back on the table. "Must be exhausting for him."

"Then leave," I said quietly.

Lila's smile disappeared. "What did you say?"

I looked up at her. "If I'm such a problem, leave. Find another alpha. Another territory. Stop making this harder than it has to be."

Her eyes flashed. "You think you can tell me what to do?"

"I think you're wasting your time." I went back to chopping. "Ryder made it clear. The bond doesn't change anything. I'm property. You have nothing to worry about."

Lila grabbed my wrist. Hard. The knife clattered to the table.

"Listen to me very carefully," she said, her voice low and dangerous. "I don't care what Ryder told you. I don't care what you think. The bond exists. It's going to pull you together. And when it does, I'll make sure you regret ever stepping foot in this territory."

She released my wrist and straightened.

"Enjoy the kitchen work, Vada. It's the closest you'll ever get to having a purpose here."

Then she walked out.

The kitchen was silent.

Mara cleared her throat. "Get back to work. All of you."

Everyone returned to their tasks. I picked up the knife and continued chopping, my wrist still throbbing where Lila had grabbed it.

She was right about one thing. The bond was going to pull Ryder and me together eventually. I could feel it getting stronger every hour. Every time I thought about him. Every time I remembered his hand on my chin.

But I wasn't going to let that happen. I wasn't going to give Lila a reason to hurt me. I wasn't going to be another complication in Ryder's life.

I'd keep my head down. Do my work. Stay out of everyone's way.

Survive.

That was all I could do.

---

Lunch came and went. I didn't eat. Mara kept me working through the meal, serving food to the rogues who filed through the dining hall.

They stared at me. Some curious. Some hostile. A few looked at me like I was something fragile that might break.

I ignored all of them.

When the last rogue left, Mara finally let me sit.

"Eat," she said, handing me a plate. "You're no use to me if you collapse."

I ate quickly. The food was good but I barely tasted it.

Mara sat across from me, watching. "You're tougher than you look."

I didn't know what to say to that.

"Most pack wolves don't last a day here," she continued. "They're too soft. Too used to structure and rules. But you... you just put your head down and work."

"I don't have a choice."

"Everyone has a choice." Mara leaned back. "You could fight and refuse or better still make this difficult for everyone. But you're not. Why?"

I looked at her. "Because fighting won't change anything. I'm here. The bond exists. Fighting just makes it worse."

Mara nodded slowly. "That's smart. Most people don't figure that out until it's too late."

She stood and took my empty plate. "Rest for ten minutes. Then we start dinner prep."

I leaned back against the wall, exhausted.

The door opened again.

Not Lila this time.

Kade.

He walked over and sat where Mara had been. "Surviving?"

"Barely."

He almost smiled. "Mara's tough but fair. She'll work you to death but she won't let you starve."

"Good to know."

Kade studied me for a moment. "Lila came by earlier."

I tensed. "You heard?"

"The whole fortress heard. She's not exactly subtle." He leaned forward. "She threatened you."

It wasn't a question.

"Yes."

"And you didn't report it to Ryder."

"Why would I? He doesn't care. I'm just property, remember?"

Kade's expression shifted. "He said that?"

"He made it very clear."

"Interesting." Kade sat back. "Because the Ryder I know doesn't spend sixty thousand on property. And he definitely doesn't let said property stay in the fortress instead of throwing them in the dungeons."

I frowned. "There are dungeons?"

"Three levels below us. That's where prisoners go. That's where you should have gone if you were just property." Kade looked at me seriously. "But you're not in the dungeons, Vada. You're in a bedroom. With a lock to keep people out, not to keep you in. He gave you work instead of chains. That means something."

"It means he doesn't know what to do with me."

"Maybe." Kade stood. "Or maybe it means the bond affects him more than he wants to admit."

He walked toward the door. Stopped and looked back.

"Lila's dangerous when she's threatened. Watch your back. And if she comes after you again, you tell me. Understand?"

I nodded.

Kade left.

I sat there, trying to process what he'd said.

The bond affected Ryder more than he admitted.

I didn't want to believe that. Didn't want to think that maybe, somewhere under all that coldness, he felt the pull the same way I did.

Because if he did, that made everything more complicated.

Mara came back. "Break's over. Get up."

I stood and went back to work.

---

By the time dinner ended and the kitchen was cleaned, it was dark outside.

Mara dismissed me with a grunt. "Same time tomorrow. Don't be late."

I walked back through the corridors, my entire body aching. My hands were blistered. My feet hurt. I smelled like cooking oil and onions.

But I'd survived my first full day.

I reached my room and pushed the door open.

Ryder was inside, sitting on my bed and waiting for me.