Chapter five

I once had the urge to use the toilet urgently but was stuck in the traffic jam for hours. I had to swallow my pride and distort in a nearby bush to relieve myself. It was one of the terrible moments of my life I will never forget.

The inability to find something around the house when it's always in the same place irritates the hell out of me. I spent three hours pulling my hair out of frustration while searching for my phone all over the room. All it took was a phone call-- a phone call to realize it was in my pocket all along. I have never felt more stupid after that.

The engine of my car sputtered to life after thirty minutes of patience, persistence and hard work while I ran late for my interview. The car hissed out a horrible sound like that of an old man dying. Dripping black oil stained my fingers, ear-splitting bangs shook me about like biscuits in a tin. With a loud fart, a cloud of smoke blasted out from the exhaust pipe and everything went dead again for the million times in minutes.

"Kasali, where is the mechanic now." I coughed violently, patting the beads of sweat stuck to my forehead in ascending order with my handkerchief.

"He say, when he finish eating his Iya Labisi amala, he will come." Kasali ran towards my car, hitting the bonnet repeatedly like that will do that magic.

"What kind of whack mechanic is that? Can't you bring another serious-minded one?" I picked up my bag, searching for my phone.

"No!" He shook his head negatively. "Mechanic macho is the best in the world, na him build Ferrari and Bugatti with his two hands in one day." He removed his cap, trying to pass his point across.

"I don't have time for your nonsense this morning." I walked past him to search for a cab to convey me to the island.

The street looked empty and deserted with tunes of radio from houses reverberating around the neighbourhood like it was recorded and music to the feets on the street, a chaotic rhythm born of the universal soul. There is a tempo to it all, and upbeat mambo that's asking why the passers-by aren't dancing, instead taking their usual steps. People smiled at him and gave him money while he sang in appreciation.

A cab stopped beside me but I couldn't help but feel nervous. The driver looked like one that was high on weed and he could kidnap me in a jiffy.

"Hanty, where you dey go?" His thick accent asked as he peeped at me from his window.

"Abuja, will you carry me for free?" I snapped.

"This one na bad market." He hissed and started the engine of his car. 

I walked hurriedly from the street and entering into the bustling road. A lot of commuters and motorists were putting the road into good use by making everywhere rowdy. 

"Please, is there no bus heading to Obalende?" I asked an old woman standing beside me.

"The last bus will be here any minute from now." She said, holding her umbrella and purse tightly.

A lot of people stood at the same park waiting for the last bus to come. It will definitely be a struggle because no one wants to be left out. Despite the fact that it is only 7:50 am in the morning, Lagos traffic is already snarled and gridlocked. I remember a recent trip to the island, Lekki to be precise, a journey shorter than 50 kilometres took me five hours. The traffic was that crazy.

The anticipated yellow danfo bus soon drove in, almost hitting some people. People cursed at the driver and the conductor, a usual hoodlum with ordinary vest and faded jeans told them to calm down and started screaming Obalende.

People pulled, pushed, and shoved trying so hard to enter the bus so as not to be left out. As the usual sharp Lagos girl that I am that refused to carry last, I equally pushed and shoved till I secured a seat at the back near the window side. Window sides are always my favourite spot to sit when travelling by plane, train, car, or bus. 

Hawkers tapped my window side telling me to buy fresh gala and chilled Pepsi that helps to cure catarrh and cough. The truth is, everyone is hustling so people will do and say anything just to get someone to patronize them just like this hawker is currently doing.

"Enter with your change o, na five hundred naira." The conductor hollered tapping the roof of his bus. People started groaning with most of them complaining they are with one thousand naira.

"Make una no try me o, wahala for who no get change o." The conductor hollered, some people began leaving the bus. Some patronized hawkers just to get change.

The bus began moving slowly, rocking us from side to side as we travel through the familiar roads. They are those who chatter excitedly about politics and Nigerian government like they have known one another for a lifetime. Their voices rising and blending with the roaring engine of the bus. And old woman brought out her bible and glasses and began preaching about rapture coming soon, another man brought out herbal products and began advertising it and on and on it goes that way, all of us together and separate feeling all the same turns and bumps.

I plugged my earpiece into my phone, listening to fem by Davido as I stared at the blurry building and trees we passed by with fresh air gushing around me, whipping at my braids. The road had lain over the earth for as long as anyone could remember. It had been so many years since the time of car that they had been left-- abandoned by the government and lavishing the money on themselves and family. They left the roads for nature to reclaim in her good time-- and she had started in earnest. 

If we look into the disadvantages of something we must surely consider the advantages. In the weathered cracks was gathered new soil, enough to temper seeds to grow. Their roots grew in, their leaves a bright green over the grey and the land began to breathe once more. Healing the scars of old.

Someone patted my shoulder, I turned to stare at the person but all I saw was moving lips without hearing a thing. It took me a while to realize I still had my earpiece plugged in.

"Hi," he waved at me, exposing his pearly set of teeth.

I opened and closed my mouth utterly speechless, do male fictional cartoon character exists in real life because he was damn fine.

"I was bored so I thought you could keep me company." He blurted out scratching his low cut hairstyle. He saw the shock register on my face before I could hide it. A small smile played on his lips, I guess he gets that a lot.

"I'm Tife Coker." I extended my hands for a handshake.

He received the handshake with a smile. "I'm Benjamin Bankole, popularly known as B.B." he smiled, adjusting his glasses.

"So, where are you heading to?" He leaned on his chair staring at me and waiting for a response.

"I'm going to Ajah for an interview." I sighed heavily.

"Oh," his lips pouted, "best of luck."

"Thanks, where are you heading to?" I asked, staring at his dark brown chocolate skin. Black is truly beautiful.

"I'm going to work." He patted the sweat on his forehead.

"And where is that?" I switched off my music to concentrate solely on him.

"Access bank headquarters, I'm a full staff." He removed his recommended glasses and began cleaning it.

My eyes opened wider in astonishment and excitement. "That is exactly where I'm heading to, you must be swimming in money," I said making him chuckle as his long eyelashes fluttered rapidly.

"I heard there is an opening so yes, they are currently hiring people, but as for the money." He wore his glasses back. "I'm afraid I suck at swimming." He said and we both chuckled.

"So, what did you study in school?" I asked him staring at the gold rim of his glasses.

"I studied Yoruba and finished from Unilorin." He shrugged.

At this point, I searched for a remote in my head and pressed pause and instantly the whole world froze. His shoulders looked unbalanced since I paused him before he could complete his action.

How on earth did a Yoruba literate get a job in a big organization like the overall headquarters of Access bank. How? Why? When? What? Were the questions circulating in my head. I pressed play again and everything went back to normal.

"How does Yoruba education correlate with Banking and finance?" I asked with a frown.

"You of all people should know that nothing ever correlates in this Country." He nodded while I listened on.

"My mother happens to know a top manager that used to be her classmate so she fixed me up there to do my IT and I continued the job as soon as I graduated, so far I have spent two years there." He cracked his knuckles and throwing a few glances my way.

"Wow, so connection is what truly rules this country. That's so unfair." I cried out.

"Corruption and greed is a huge cankerworm that has eaten deeply into this country policy, affairs, and everything so one has to be smart and act fast." He peered at me, pointing his index finger at his head.

"Can corruption ever get eradicated? Can poverty ever be exterminated? Can bad governance ever stop?" My voice drops so low as I shook my head in pity with my emotions becoming too heavy to carry.

"First, corruption is everywhere so it can never fully be eradicated." He raised a finger. 

"Second, poverty can only be reduced but can not fully be exterminated. That's how God has designed the world, some people have to suffer so others can enjoy. We just pray we don't come to this world to suffer." He gesticulated with his hands.

"Bad governance? I feel like if a serious-minded, God-fearing youth takes over the country, it will be a better place for all." He concluded, rubbing his neck.

"All these old cargoes have nothing to offer us yet they complain our generations are the lazy youth. They seem to forget that they raised our generations." I spat, anger slowly seeping through me, as we finally dived into politics.

"What hurts me the most is misplaced priority. This country values irrelevance and nonsense over education and talents and it is depressing to think of." His forehead creased.

"They gift miss Unilag flashy cars with a million naira and give the best graduating students, fifteen thousand naira with loads of textbooks. Are they motivating us or telling us to withdraw from education?" I looked ahead and saw we were almost reaching Lekki phase 1 and we will be alighting soon. The time on my phone said 8: 05 am. 

"What of how they appoint big brother Naija stars to the top position, giving the position to people that don't merit it." He dug his hands into his pocket to fish out money for the conductor.

"Instead of giving the position to brilliant and qualified people, they give it to those that went to display nudity and beauty for three months." I dug into my wallet trying to pick a five hundred naira note.

"Money for two," Bankole said to the conductor waving him away.

"Here is your money." I stretched my hand to him, waiting for him to accept it.

"No its fine, I'm just being a gentleman that my mother raised me to be." He grinned, exposing his dimples.

"Alright, thanks very much B.B, it was nice having a chat with you." I smiled, watching his black eyes pierce my soul.

"All thanks to you for keeping up with my boring ass." He smirked and soon the bus came to a halt and everyone began alighting from the bus.

"So we are still going to board a tricycle, Keke maruwa to tollgate. Access bank is right adjacent to the toll gate." He said and I followed his lead.