Chapter Four

  Between the mind-blowing sex, Derek's amazing cooking and our long drives through the city, I couldn’t pick which was my favorite. 

Spending time with him was bliss. For the first time in years, I felt like I had nothing to worry about. 

I had also learned a few things, like his favorite book. 

His favorite book was the notebook. Who would have thought a man like Derek was also a reader? 

  “El, are you judging me again?” he asked with a smile on his lips one evening as we laid together on his couch.

 I laughed. “No, I’m not. I’m just really shocked.”

   “Because I’m attractive?”

I rolled my eyes. “You look like you’d snap a man’s head in half. You remind me of the boys my mom used to warn me about.”

He laughed softly and placed a kiss on my forehead. “Your mom was wrong then,”

  A week and half ago, I didn’t even know this man existed. 

Now, I knew what he smelled like, the way he liked his coffee and how he kissed my forehead when he thought I was asleep. 

My mother won’t approve of this. She’d say I was moving too fast, and he was bad for me, but I’ve never been happier.

Derek made me feel safe, and maybe I was wrong to swear off men. I was willing to give him a chance.

Now, I am sitting in front of my mirror applying my makeup.

 I spent over an hour getting ready which, was rather ridiculous. 

Derek had this annoying effect on me where I suddenly started caring about my lingerie matching and my makeup being perfect even though he told me I was perfect without any of it.

By seven-fifteen, I was fully dressed and I sat by the window waiting for his car to pull up like I usually did.

At seven thirty, I checked my phone. Nothing. Derek was never late.

By ten minutes past eight, I picked up my phone to call him. I was getting impatient. We had reservations for eight o'clock and we were already late. 

I called him, it went straight to voicemail. 

A strange feeling settled in my stomach. Derek always picked on the first ring. 

I tried again ten minutes later, voicemail again. 

By nine o'clock, anxiety had fully set in. 

What if something bad had happened to him? 

What if he was in an accident on his way here? It had rained heavily earlier.

There were no reports of an accident on the local news.

I texted him quickly, asking him if he was okay.

No reply.

I stared at the screen for several minutes. 

By ten o'clock, I decided to drive to his apartment. 

There had to be a reasonable explanation for his silence. 

Mostly, I prayed he was okay and maybe he was just busy with work or an emergency.

My stomach tightened as I approached the building and noticed his Ferrari wasn’t outside.

I hurried toward the front desk.

The concierge looked up immediately. “Good evening ma’am.”

  “Hi,” I breathed out. “I’m here to see Derek.”

“I’m sorry,” he said carefully. “He’s not available right now,”

   “What do you mean?” I frowned. “Is he alright?”

The man hesitated. “Yes, he’s just fine.”

 “Oh,”

I was relieved and disappointed. 

Derek was okay and that’s what mattered, but I was disappointed he forgot about our date, and he couldn’t even send a text.

  “Can I go upstairs to see him?”

   “I can’t allow you upstairs,”

Confusion washed over me. “What?”

The concierge had discomfort written all over his face. “Mr Derek left instructions,”

I raised a brow.

   “What instructions?”

He looked like he wanted the floor to swallow him whole.

  “You’re not allowed access to the penthouse anymore,”

The words didn’t register immediately. It had to be a prank. Derek was very playful at times. 

  “This is a mistake,” I laughed nervously. “Call him and tell him Eloise is here to see him,”

His face softened with pity. His expression told me everything before he spoke.

  “The instructions were very clear, ma’am. He’d probably reach out to you when he’s ready to see you,”

Something inside of me cracked.

My fingers tightened around my purse as my face reddened with embarrassment. 

No explanation, no goodbye. 

The worst part? I was with him YESTERDAY. 

He made love to me, he kissed me. 

He told me he was glad he met me, and he’d never been this happy in a while. 

He sent me a funny reel on I*******m this morning and we laughed about it.

 I just taught him how to use the app, and he won’t stop sending me reels.

He told me he couldn’t get enough of me.

And now? I wasn’t even allowed into his house.

This humiliation was worse than heartbreak. 

I felt dumb for allowing a man I barely knew to make a fool out of me. 

I felt stupid for thinking that things would be different with him.

I had only known him for about a week!

Most of all, I was disappointed in myself. 

When I moved here, I decided I wanted a fresh start.

 I wanted nothing to do with a man.

And Derek came along.

And I broke my own rule. I broke it easily, without thinking twice.

A man had hurt me but most of all, I hurt myself.

The concierge looked genuinely apologetic. “I’m really sorry, Miss,”

I smiled weakly even though my eyes were burning.

  “It’s fine,”

But it wasn’t. 

    

I walked out of the building with my head held high even though my legs felt like jelly and I was scared I was going to fall.

I stood beside my car for a moment, staring at the building.

I wanted to scream.