Hello, my amazing readers! This is your favorite author...uhm, am I your favorite? Well, you still love me I knowđ¤đ¤. This is Soter! First of all, I owe you all a massive apology for keeping you waiting. I know, I know, how dare I? But trust me, life had me in a chokehold. It threw responsibilities at me like an overzealous gym instructor, and letâs just sayâŚI dodged most of them except the ones that kidnapped my time. But hereâs the good newsâdrumroll, please! T.H.O.W will officially start updating on April 1st (and no, this isnât an April Foolâs joke, I promise I wonât pull anything on you). From that day forward, weâre going full speed ahead, straight to completion by the end of April! No dragging things out, no rushing through like a caffeine overdose, just the perfect mix of drama, fwop fwopđ, chaos, and the unhinged energy that Blaze and Carlo demand. Also, can we talk about how insanely patient you all are? The way youâve stuck around, sending love, rereading, theorizing, a
CarloA week has passed since the last time I saw that prick. These days, no matter how busy I am, heâs always in my head. I fucking hate the way he lives rent-free there.Weâve gotten used to our meeting daysâthree times a week. If I need an extra day, I can call him over, but Blaze will make my ears bleed over that. Still, he shows up.As if on cue, my phone lights up and his name pops up. A smile unconsciously plays on my lips as I tap the screen to take the call. His voice comes through my earbud.âHey, your secretary says you wonât be available,â he blurts outâtypical of him. Pleasantries never work with him.I glance at my wristwatch. Itâs already 7 p.m. Damn it. We were supposed to meet today, but itâs late, and my work is still piled up.âHm, still quite busy, butâŚâ I pause for a second, an idea popping into my head. It would be thrilling to have him here. Immediately, my mind floods with possibilities.âCome to my office.âBlazeâs response is instant. âThe fuck? I thought we
BlazeâBlaze, fix your damn collar. You look like a stray dog.âI barely turn my head to glare at Carlo as he reaches out, tugging at my jacket like some overbearing mother. His fingers brush against my neck, and I slap his hand away.He had dragged me out today to go see my mother. I mean his gestures lately have been strange, I was shocked to see him ordering everyone around after seeing thereâs no caretaker in my mumâs room. Everyone began to scramble around seeing us walk in, I just realized how much heâs a CEO, heâs still a prick to me regardless, just like now.My mind snaps back to him, âThe fuck are you doing?â I bark, stepping back. Heâs gone insane.âTrying to make you look less like someone who sleeps in a dumpster,â he says smoothly, unfazed as ever, that stupid look on his face again, bastard!I scoff, tugging my jacket back into place. âMind your fucking business. I didnât ask for your help.âCarlo just smirks, leaning against his car like he has all the time in the worl
BlazeâShit. What time is it?â I mumble to myself, staring at the clock on my phone for the tenth time. The race has already started, but Iâm still here, sitting on my damn couch like an idiot.I should be there. Max expects me to be there. Iâm his fucking coach.But after yesterdayâs argument, I donât know if he even wants to see me.I rub my face, feeling the weight of indecision pressing against my skull. Max was pissed. I saw it in his eyes. That frustration, the way he clenched his jaw, the fire burning behind his words. And now, Iâm hesitating like a coward, wondering if my presence will just piss him off more.Fuck it.I grab my jacket and keys, shoving my doubts aside. Max is more than just some racer Iâm coaching. Heâs⌠hell, I donât even know what the fuck he is to me. But I care. And that means getting my ass to the damn track.By the time I get there, the crowd is thick. Engines roar in the distance, tires screeching against pavement. The scent of burning rubber clings to
CarloâFucking hellâŚâI rub a hand over my face, leaning back in my chair, staring at the ceiling like it holds the answer to the chaos in my head. Itâs been four days. Four fucking days since Blaze walked out on me, and I swear Iâm losing my goddamn mind.I should be pissed. I should be fucking livid that he thinks he can just storm out, slam the door in my face, and go on like I never fucking existed. But Iâm not angry.Iâm obsessed.Blaze has always been unpredictable, always ready to fight me even when I give him everything. But this time, itâs different. This time, he actually fucking left. And I canât stop thinking about him. Every damn second, my mind goes back to that momentâhis sharp, furious glare, the way his voice shook with rage when he told me we were done. Like he meant it. Like he actually fucking meant it.I donât accept that.My fingers tap against the desk, my teeth grinding as I try to focus on the reports in front of me. But my patience is wearing thin. Itâs been
BlazeWhere the fuck did it all go wrong?I keep asking myself that, like thereâs some moment I missedâsome switch that flipped when I wasnât looking. Itâs stupid how I was starting to think he was being nice. Fucking nice to me. As if he ever could be.I drag my fingers through my hair, stepping into the bar I used to work at. I havenât been here in months, but it still smells the sameâsweat, stale beer, cheap perfume. Something about it makes me feel grounded, like maybe if I sit in this booth long enough, Iâll remember who I was before everything went to shit.Before Carlo.I slide into a seat near the back and wave the bartender over. The guy recognizes me, offers a crooked smile, and pours me the usual without asking.I take a sip. It burns like hell. Good.My thoughts are a fucking mess. My head wonât shut up. All I hear is his voice. All I see is his fucking face. And that part of my chestâthe stupid part that does that bathum⌠bathum shit like some lovesick idiotâit wonât fuck
CarloâI like him?â I mutter to myself, sitting on the couch in my office, legs opened, my elbows resting on my thighs and fingers laced into each other, my head bowed, staring into space.Fuck.I didnât even plan to say it. The words just⌠slipped. Came out like a goddamn confession I didnât even know I had buried somewhere in this twisted-ass brain of mine.But now that Iâve said it, now that itâs hanging in the air like some curse I canât take back, itâs like my mind wonât shut the fuck up. Everything starts piecing itself together, like my body knew before my head did.I like Blaze?No. Itâs worse.I fucking love him.And that realization is pissing me the fuck off.I rub my palm down my face and sit back, jaw tight. What the hell am I supposed to do with that? Iâm not some soft little bitch who falls in love and sends flowers and writes cute texts and waits for a reply like a dumb dog wagging its tail.Thatâs not me.Or at least, it wasnât.Until Blaze. Arghh, this is so frustrat
BlazeâItâs fucking gone,â I mutter under my breath as we pull up to the building.Flames arenât licking the sky anymore, but the smokeâfuckâthe smoke still hangs like a dark fucking omen above what used to be my apartment. Fire trucks are parked haphazardly, sirens off now, lights still spinning like itâs all some twisted party I wasnât invited to. I stumble out of the car before Carlo even fully stops it.Part of the building is still standing, but the right side, my fucking side, looks like someone ripped it apart and tried to cook it. The firefighters are already wrapping shit up, the worst of it over, but all I see is black char and twisted metal where my room used to be.âNo. Fuck. No,â I whisper, running a hand through my hair. My heartâs pounding. Not just from panic, but from this helpless, stupid feeling of loss. All my shitâs in there. My jacket. My tools. My fucking sketchpad. Everything.Carlo stands next to me, silent, watching the building like itâs a goddamn TV show. I
BlazeâYouâre staring.âCarlo doesnât even flinch. He leans against the fence like he owns the damn place, arms folded, sunglasses hiding those eyes that I know are full of heat right now.âYouâre showing off.âI snort, adjusting the strap of my helmet as I hop off the bike. Sweat slicks my back, my shirt sticking to me in all the wrong places, but the way Carlo watches me like Iâm a damn god? Yeah, I could stay like this all day.âItâs called warming up, old man. You wouldnât know anything about that since your ass is always parked behind a desk or on top of me.âHis smirk curves up, slow and lazy. âYou saying Iâm outta shape?ââIâm saying your skills are probably rusted as fuck.âA few of the other guys laugh as they roll by. The track is full todayâsmell of burnt rubber in the air, engines roaring, tires screeching. I havenât felt this alive in months. And having him here, watching me? Fuck, it does something to me. Twists my gut in the best way.âWanna test that theory?â Carlo pus
BlazeâYou better not fucking burn this place down,â I say, eyeing Carlo like heâs some ticking time bomb with a goddamn lighter in his hand.He just laughs, carrying a couple of shopping bags into the kitchen like he owns the goddamn world. Well, technically he owns this fucking house, so maybe he does.âI ainât that bad, baby,â he smirks, dropping the bags on the counter like itâs nothing. âI can cook⌠a little.ââYeah, fucking right,â I snort, crossing my arms over my chest. âYou were raised with a goddamn silver spoon shoved so far up your ass, Iâm surprised you even know what a stove looks like.âHe chuckles again, that deep fucking sound that rattles straight into my bones. âThen Iâll assist, chef Blaze.âI roll my eyes but I canât help the way my mouth pulls into a fucking smile. God, Iâm a mess for this asshole.As Iâm pulling out some veggies to start chopping, heâs unloading shitâmeat, pasta, some fancy-ass sauce, even a goddamn bottle of wine. He looks so fucking proud of h
BlazeâYou fucking serious right now?â Alexi says, kicking off her shoes and flopping down on the oversized couch like she owns the place.I throw a cushion at her. âDonât get your nasty feet on my new shit, Alexi.âShe flips me off without missing a beat. âWhatever. So you chose the scumbag, huh?âI grunt, dragging my hand through my hair. âI didnât fucking choose him. Itâs my stupid ass heart that did.âAlexi snorts like she doesnât believe me. And maybe I donât even believe myself, fuck. I mean, yeah, Carloâs a manipulative piece of shit. But I seem to fucking enjoy his shit, itâs twisted. Thatâs the fucking problem.The mansionâs too damn big. Echoes of our voices bounce off the fancy-ass walls like reminders that I donât even belong here. This whole placeâevery fucking thingâwas bought by Carlo. Because I refused to stay in his goddamn penthouse like some kept little toy. And somehow⌠this felt less shitty. Like I could breathe here. Like I still had my own space.âYou know your
CarloAfter one month of the accident that made Blaze consider my pathetic love, if I had known that was the solution I would have bumped into a tree a long time ago⌠I am back to the office.âIf you donât give me that fucking hotel, Iâm gonna send the second drive to dad. And this one has more than just company shit, Carlo⌠this one proves youâre fucking a man. The heir to Davenport, the golden boy, the one heâs been grooming since we were kids⌠balls deep in a fucking guy. Think about that.âThatâs how William walks into my fucking office at 7AM.No fucking good morning, not like we have good relationship to say pleasantries anyway, but straight up blackmailing me is fucking insane. Just like him.I lean back slowly in my chair, trying to pretend my head isnât already throbbing from everything else going on. My jaw clenches, and I force my voice to stay calm even though every muscle in me is screaming to fucking pounce on him.âYouâre bluffing.ââAm I?â William smirks, tossing a fla
BlazeâFelixâs drunk ass is at my bar again. You might wanna come get him before he breaks something.âThatâs the fucking call I get at 1:34 a.m. Just when I thought this night couldnât get any worse. Iâm lying in bed, staring at the goddamn ceiling, half replaying Carloâs bullshit from earlier and half trying to pretend I donât care. But then that call comes in and all my attempts at peace flush straight down the fucking toilet.I drag myself out of bed, throw on whatever hoodie I can find, and head out. Itâs not even about wanting to go. Itâs guilt. Itâs instinct. Itâs⌠fuck, I donât even know anymore. All I know is, Felix is at his worst, and Iâm the only person who probably still gives a damn.By the time I get to the bar, itâs exactly what I expected. Dim lights, sticky floor, music too loud for this dead hour, and Felix slumped at the edge of the counter, head half in a glass, mumbling to himself. His face is flushed, eyes glassy. Itâs that mix of broken and belligerent that onl
BlazeâDude, that bike looks like it was smashed into a rock, the fall was messy,â Alexi continues to rant as we walk to the shop together, but my feet fucking freeze the moment we get to the front.âWoah, what a fucking handsome rich dude, he looks like the wealthy God from Greek. Damn, I suddenly remember I have a working pussy,â she whispers, eyes wide and stuck to the tall figure casually smoking in front of my shop like he owns the place.âWhat the hell, Alexi⌠Thought you were the top and youâre not into âdicksâ?â I ask, forcing a smile, but the truth is, my stomach is in knots, flipping like itâs on crack.âYeah, but trying it once with that gorgeous figure is an achievement,â she mutters. I donât laugh. I canât even move a fucking muscle.Carlo. That stupidly gorgeous bastard. His shirt is slightly open, tattoos on full display, hair slicked perfectly to the side, fucking polished from head to toe like he belongs in a mafia fantasy. His headâs down, so he hasnât seen us yet, b
BlazeâYou actually suck at this. Move. Let me do it.âAlexi snatches the wrench from my hand like I just committed some kind of sacred sin, and I donât even fight her on it. I step back, wiping sweat from my neck with the back of my hand, watching her lean over the greasy engine like she owns the damn thing.âYou know Iâm still recovering from rich-boy trauma, right?â I mutter, lighting a cigarette and squinting at her through the smoke. âThree weeks out and I still flinch every time I see marble floors.âShe snorts. âYeah, well, this ainât no penthouse, sugar. This is grease, fuel, and freedom. Welcome back to the land of the living.âI smirk a little.Three months. Thatâs how long itâs been since I walked out of Carloâs place and didnât look back. Since I shoved every memory, every fucked-up emotion, and every craving for his touch into a goddamn box and tossed it somewhere far away.This new place? Itâs loud, rough, smells like gasoline and old tires, and I fucking love it. I open
CarloâWhiskey. Double shot. Donât go light.âThe bartender doesnât ask questions. Just pours and slides it over, itâs been a long time I came here but they still treat me like a regular. The glass hits my lips, and it burns like itâs supposed to. I stare at the bar stand where Blaze used to stand, all cocky and full of heat. Itâs dead now. Cold. Like someone ripped the fucking soul out of the place.I down another.The club smells different without him here. Itâs got that same stale sweat and desperation vibe, but itâs missing the spice. The fire. The fucking heartbeat. And I hate that I came here thinking maybe I could feel close to him. Maybe Iâd see a shadow of him in the corners. Dumb shit like that.âYou look like you need more than just a drink, man.âThe voice comes from behind me. Smooth. Confident. I turn my head and thereâs a guyâdark hair, pierced lip, smirking like he knows exactly what heâs offering. I donât respond right away. Just stare.Heâs not Blaze. But heâs got th
CarloDays pass.Then weeks.Then fucking months.Every morning I wake up hoping heâs on the couch. Hoping Iâll smell his skin again, hear him cussing at the coffee machine. But itâs just silence. Cold, empty fucking silence that echoes louder than a scream.The bed feels too fucking big. I roll to his side every night like a goddamn addict chasing a fix that ainât there. I breathe into his pillow even though the scentâs faded. I still look for his towel on the bathroom rack. His boots by the door. But all I see is absence.I hire a private investigator. I pay triple to get the best. They come up with nothing. No name, no face, no trace. Like he never fucking existed.I start checking the places we used to hang outâbars, the old underground garage, that beat-up taco truck near Fifth where he always asked for extra hot sauce and never finished the food. I even go back to the last racing ring we chilled at, the one where he nearly punched a mechanic for scratching someone elseâs car. I