Chapter 4

I sat alone in the back seat of the car, staring through the window without really seeing anything.

My eyes were still burning from crying.My hands wouldn't stop shaking.Yet I refused to let go of the exam certificate.

I held it tightly against my chest, as though it were the only thing keeping me from falling apart.

Ronan's laughter kept replaying in my head.The way he had imitated my walk.The way everyone had laughed.The way Seraphina had leaned against Kael while asking if I really walked like that every day.

And Kael's silence.That silence hurt the most. I closed my eyes.I had known.For a long time, I had known.Kael's friends and some of the pack members talked about me behind my back.

They mocked my injured leg.They questioned why Kael had married me.They wondered how someone like him could have a Luna like me.

I had heard whispers before.I had caught people staring.Sometimes, I even heard their voices when they thought I was too far away to listen.

But I never told Kael.Not once.I didn't want to create trouble for him.Being an Alpha was already difficult enough.Kael carried the entire pack on his shoulders.

There were territories to protect, warriors to lead, disputes to settle, and countless responsibilities waiting for him every day.

I didn't want to become another problem he had to deal with.So I endured it.I convinced myself that it didn't matter.I told myself that as long as Kael treated me well, other people's opinions weren't important.

But now...I finally understood how foolish I had been.If Kael's friends mocked me, would he really choose to fight with them because of me?

No.He wouldn't.He had already shown me that.

Compared with his friends...What was I to him?

The words I had heard over the years suddenly came rushing back.

She's just a cripple. Without Alpha marrying her, who would want her?My breathing became heavier.

Another voice followed.She married an Alpha like him. What else could she possibly want?My hands began to tremble harder.

Then came the cruelest one.

If I were Alpha, I'd rather be the one who got injured in that accident than marry a cripple and be laughed at by everyone.

My eyes filled with tears.I pressed my lips together.Another memory surfaced.Other Alphas have elegant and impressive Lunas beside them. Only our Alpha has a Luna he can't even bring outside.

I couldn't breathe.My chest tightened.

The car suddenly felt too small.I lowered my head.

"Stop..."

The words came out as a whisper.But the voices wouldn't stop.They kept coming.Overlapping.

Laughing.Judging me.

I started to panic.My fingers went numb.

I struggled to breathe.Then I suddenly remembered something.

My device.

I quickly picked it up and opened the old photo files.One picture appeared on the screen.I stared at it.

The woman in the photograph was smiling confidently.She wore warrior armor.Her hair was tied back.Her posture was straight.There was no hesitation in her eyes.

I swiped.Another picture.Me standing among the warriors after a successful hunt.Another, receiving an award.Another standing proudly beside the pack's other elite warriors.

There were so many.Photos of battles.

Training sessions.Achievements.Honors.

A life I had almost forgotten.I stared at my younger self.I used to be talented.I had been one of the strongest warriors in the pack.I had been chosen to become the Chief Warrior.

I had once believed I could accomplish anything if I worked hard enough.Then everything changed.Because of that accident.Because I saved Kael.

A thought suddenly entered my mind.Was saving him a mistake?My fingers froze over the screen.

For the first time, I allowed myself to ask the question.

If I hadn't pushed Kael away...If I hadn't taken the impact...Would my life be different now?Would I still be a warrior?Would I still be confident?Would I still have a future that belonged entirely to me?

A tear fell onto the screen.I wiped it away.

"No."My voice shook."Don't think like that."

Saving Kael wasn't something I regretted.At least, it shouldn't have been.

I had never wanted to marry him.It was Kael who came to me.It was Kael who knelt in front of me.

It was Kael who proposed.It was Kael who made me believe that perhaps my life could still have meaning after the accident.

He had given me hope.And I had believed him.

I covered my face with both hands.Then I cried.

I cried for the woman I used to be.I cried for the three years I had spent waiting.I cried for the marriage I had believed would become something more.

I cried because perhaps, all along, I had been the only person who believed in it.I didn't know how long I cried.

Eventually, my tears began to slow.I wiped my face.Then I took a deep breath.

I forced myself to calm down.The Royal Academy qualification exam was only supposed to be practice.

That was what I had told myself.I wasn't expecting much.I simply wanted to see how much I still remembered.

But now...I wanted to pass.More than anything.

I wanted to know something.If I left Kael...If I left this pack...Could I still become someone valuable?Could I become the woman I used to be?

Or had I really become nothing more than the cripple everyone believed me to be?

I looked down at the exam certificate in my hand.

My grip tightened.

I would find out.

***

When I arrived at the examination site, the qualification exam was about to begin.I stepped out of the car and made my way toward the registration area.

The wolf responsible for registration looked up when I approached.His eyes immediately fell on my injured leg.

He hesitated.

Then he looked back at me."Are you sure you want to take the Military Command preliminary qualification exam?"

I lifted my head.For a moment, I said nothing.

Then I handed him my examination certificate.

"Yes."

I looked directly into his eyes."I am sure."

He took the certificate.

After checking it, he nodded and completed my registration.

I turned toward the examination hall.Over the past few years, I had spent a lot of time alone at home.

At first, I hated it.There was too much silence.

Too much time to think.But eventually, I found ways to occupy myself.I read books about war history.

Territory management.Military strategy.

Leadership.Tactics.

At the time, I had considered them nothing more than a way to pass the endless hours.

I never imagined they would become useful again.But now I understood.Those years hadn't been completely wasted.

Everything I had learned while sitting alone at home had become part of me.Perhaps they were the foundation of the life I was about to build.

I took a deep breath.Then I entered the examination hall.

***

Hours later, I walked out of the academy.My mind was still filled with the questions from the exam.

Some had been difficult.Others had been familiar.I kept thinking about the answers I had given.

Had I done enough?Would I pass?

I was so lost in thought that I didn't notice the person standing directly in my path.I almost walked straight into him.

A strong hand immediately caught my arm.

I froze.Then I looked up.

Kael.

My heart skipped.He quickly steadied me. "Careful."

His eyes dropped to my injured leg.He waited until he was certain I was standing firmly before releasing me.

I stared at him.He was waiting outside the academy.For me.

Judging by the expression on his face, he had been there for a long time.

His jaw was tight.His eyes were dark.He was clearly angry.But when he finally spoke, his voice was low.

"Why didn't you come home?"

I said nothing.

"Why didn't you answer my messages?"

Still, I remained silent.

His expression tightened.

"And why did you go out alone?"

I lowered my eyes.

Kael took a breath.His anger seemed to fight with something else.Fear.

"I told you not to go out without someone protecting you."

I looked at him.His voice became even softer.

"I was scared something would happen to you."

For a moment, I simply stared at him.

Three years ago, those words would have warmed my heart.Today, they only made me wonder...

If he was truly afraid of losing me,why had he never been afraid of losing my heart?