“I hate that man, I hate that man, I hate him but oh!! How I love him”. Valentina Berkeley got married to a man she knew nothing about, a man who hated and did nothing to get close to her. At the altar he looked like someone reciting his death sentence and when they got married, he isolated himself from her. He loved another woman and made it obvious to her that he hated her because of their arranged marriage, yet she loved him. She loved his brooding look and read into the littlest things he did for her but when it became too much, she gathered what little pride she had left and divorced him. Fast forward to few years later, they meet again and they have to work together. Feelings develop and the man that was filled with hatred for her seems nowhere to be found. It does not help that she had his child and she would do anything to keep him a secret. Will she be able to keep the hatred she had for him or will he slowly eat away at the walls she built to protect herself? Will the love she once had for him overcome the hatred that built up and festered over the years or will secrets and untold truths doom their relationship to the same end? Will she give in to her son's demands for a father? Will he be able to redeem himself in her eyes or would he be the same man that hurt her time and time again?
View MoreApril 2017
It was my wedding day! it was! But where was my husband? I had been at the altar for hours and my husband was nowhere to be found. Mrs. Alicia my mother-in-law had excused herself outside to call him times and times again but he did not show up. Despite all this, the smile on my face could have been compared to the light coming in through the glass windows, I had dolled myself up for this wedding and despite the fact that my legs were killing me due to the 6-inch heels I was wearing, I refused to let anything spoil my wedding.
I looked to where my parents were seated, they smiled without a care in the world, it was expected since they were getting rid of a nuisance. They had made this fact clear to me since I was young and when the first opportunity presented itself, they thrust me into the arms of Alicia Valero. It wasn’t a bad deal to me, Alicia was lovely. She loved me even more than my parents but it was her son that was her problem. I had wanted to back out after our first meet where he treated me like I didn’t exist but his mother assured me that he just needed time so I married him.The door of the church opened and my husband entered, 3 hours late. He walked in and my breath caught, he looked so handsome even with the frown on his face, I found my mind wondering to how he would look if a smile stretched those icy lips of his, I wondered how he would look if a laugh lifted those stone hard cheeks and if the twinkle and light of laughter entered his eyes but I could only wonder, the only thing he gifted my eyes with was the frown on his face.Yet I was happy, I looked forward to when he would open up to me, to when he would show me the cheerful personality that his mother spoke so highly of. It was time to read our vows and I promised myself onto Simon till death do us part. Simon read out his vows and I felt excitement build in my heart despite the fact that he read it like a death sentence.‘I now pronounce you husband and wife’ my excitement bubbled out as the priest joined us together and I turned to kiss Simon. He placed a fleeting kiss on my lips and turned away, the kiss left much to be desired and I looked forward to our wedding night.We walked out of the church hand in hand after taking pictures but immediately we got to where cars were parked, he got in and drove off leaving me standing, stranded. My mother-in-law saved my face and instructed her driver to take me home.I got home and headed to Simon’s room still clad in my wedding gown. I was met with a shocker when Simon told me never to step foot in his room. He pushed me out and called for the maids and instructed them to show me to my room, he told me that he wants nothing to do with me and that I should meet the maids if I wanted anything.‘I can’t let you leave’, he repeats and tiredness that I masked with coffee comes creeping back,‘I done with this', I bite out through bone deep tiredness that made me forget cool headedness ‘I’m tired of this fighting’‘This back and forth with you Simon', ‘Aren’t you tired?’, I throw the question at him even when his mouth stays sealed while I spoke.I'm tired of this all so I'm going to leave'‘I'm going to go and you can just forget all of this happened'‘Just pretend that the last few months was a dream, a figment of your imagination’,Still he doesn’t speak so I turn away from him, run my hands through my hair,‘I'll write the letter again', I take his silence for acceptance, his drooped shoulders for defeat.But I feel his hands enclose around my arms, both hands holding onto me with a light touch,It’s just impossible Tina’, he whispers refusal again, and my eyes snap back to him, a biting remark on my tongue.‘You should have thought of that last week, before I
‘I'm leaving’, I slap a letter of resignation onto Simon's table the minute I entered his office, not even offering him greetings,I strode in with conviction that this was the only option,To leave and pretend the past few months never happened,Said conviction was what built grit into my steps, built strength into my arms as I slammed the letter on his table,But despite the fact that the slam of my hands still echoed in the brightly lit office, and my eyes were narrowed to slits, it didn’t stop the droop in my shoulder,Neither did it stop my diminishing confidence when Simon looks up and our eyes meet.We state at each other for all off five seconds, and in those moments the events of the day before play across his pupils,With it, reminiscence flash across my mind,The crying mess I became the minute I got home, Forcing myself to bed, yet only grabbing fitfuls of sleep, waking up repeatedly to fresh tears on my pillow,‘I can fix this', I had told myself in the dead of
Then I’m marching away from him, stomping back inside, away from cool evening air and the ellipse pool that reminded me of our stolen moments together,With relief I find that Simon doesn’t follow as I hear no footsteps from behind me.As I move back up the stairs, my stomp gradually reduces into a walk, red clearing from my vision,My shoulders are slumped again when I get to the room that had my son in it,Unbelief crowds into my head, realization dawning on me.I push open the door, to see Ajax occupied with one of the numerous action figures on the shelves, ‘Let’s go home', his face falls, but he gets up, lifting toy Spiderman with him,I walk in, picking up his bag, and hitching it on my shoulder then I hold his hand in mine,‘Aren’t we going to say bye to dad', Ajax pauses and looks up at me as we walk out of the room,‘I said bye to him already’, I pull at his hand and he follows nodding.We walk down the stairs and my heart stops when I see Simon standing at the foo
‘Your son', I scoff loudly, repeating his words.‘And what gave you the notion that he your son',‘What makes you so sure', my soles scuff tiles as I start pacing the length of the yard, letting some of my pent up anger leak out through my steps,‘Really Tina', he calls my name, and the displeasure in his words match mine,‘Are we really going to sit here and debate Ajax's paternity’, his voice is gruff, dropping lower with each word,‘He’s not', I shake my head from left to right as I pass Simon’s front repeatedly in my pacing,‘You told him yourself’, it rises again, ‘Ajax confirmed it', he grabs my hand again, forcing me to look at him.‘Even a child!!’, his face is all hardness, jaw clenched and grinding, as he punctuates the word,‘Even a child can see that we're father and son', his voice is gruff, as he finishes and his eyes darken, stormy orbs in a face of fury.I try to turn away from him, to turn away from his fury that infuriated me further, and continue pacing.
The door swings shut behind me, The noise of my sneakers hitting cement as I rushed along the driveway echoed in my ears,Drowning out the sound of the grass swaying gently in the evening breeze, louder than the sound of birds chirping from the trees,I side step the water fountain without so much as a glance at its sculpted glory,My eyes rests on those large double doors, that separated me from my son, willing it to disintegrate,Instead it does something different, swinging open, parting slowly, revealing Simon as I stomp up tiled steps.The large smile on his face was nonexistent to me, his arms open wide in greeting a momentary confusion as I sidestep him, pushing into the mansion, My heart was beating too fast in my chest, my footsteps echoing too loud in my ears for me too even regard him,To even do the simple task of asking his reason,So I ignore him, turning laser-like focus on finding my son and getting out of this largeness that had me feeling like I was drowni
Air got sucked from my lungs, like I just received a strike to the gut,‘No', I shake my head as my grip on my phone tightens,‘That can’t be true', my head keeps turning from left to right in unbelief as the click of the call ending sounded.I take the phone off my ear, bring it to the front of my face,‘That can’t be possible’, my brain felt waterlogged, my ears clogged as the noise of school children fades out.The only sound around was my heart, beating like the tick of a clock, resounding in my ears, echoing in my head,‘No', I shake my head again and call his school teacher,‘She’s probably mistaken’,‘There was no way he could be with Simon', My fingers shake against my screen as I scroll through my contacts,The first call goes to voicemail, ‘Pick up for Christ sake’, I swear under my breathe, dialing her number again,‘Could it be Adam?’‘But he would never refer to himself as Ajax’s father’, my mind swirls as the phone rings on, no sign of it being picked up.
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