Chapter 4

~Aria~

 

The cold wind bit against my skin as I drove down the lonely road, I gripped the steering wheel so hard my knuckles turned white.

The dusty town of Bedias looked exactly as I remembered it, plain, dry, and almost as quiet as a graveyard. I could have bet the whole town could hear me sniffling inside my car right now.

 

No not now, not now. Tears threatened to pour down my cheeks.

 

I had nothing left in Houston. My reputation was in ruins thanks to my husband and my so-called sister and friend who had turned their backs on me and worst of all, I was being discarded by my own family. Staying there was no longer an option.

 

The only place I could feel a little safety from everyone and everything was home in Bedias, where my Nana was.

 

By the time I had arrived at my grandmother's house the evening sky was already at its peak, illuminating a mix of orange and red hues showing that the day was already coming to an end 

 

I pulled up in front of a familiar small, wooden house. It hadn't changed a bit since my childhood only because Nana didn't want to renovate it, insisting it should remain as it was when grandpa was alive.

Staring at the front door, my stomach twisted as a lump formed in my throat.

 

Taking a deep breath, I grabbed my suitcase and stepped out. My chest ached with so much pain I didn’t know how to process it.

 

I stepped on the porch and just stood there trying to gather my thoughts and draw strength from within, when the door suddenly creaked open revealing my Nana with her gray hair styled in a bun.

Her warm eyes filled with a mix of surprise and worry as soon as she recognized me.

 

“Aria?” Nana's voice cracked slightly as she walked out the door, her eyes locking onto my suitcase “What are you doing here, child? and with your suitcases?”

 

I forced a smile, hiding the storm raging inside me while meeting her eyes. “ Nana, let's go inside first, shall we?”

 

She studied me for a long moment before nodding, allowing me to assist her as we entered the house.

 

The house smelled of cinnamon and freshly brewed tea, a scent I could never forget.

 

It made my chest tighten, a painful reminder of the little girl who used to come here every summer, barefoot and happy, with no idea that one day life would spit at her.

 

By the time I had settled in, I knew Nana wouldn't let me go easy so before she could ask any questions and catch my lie, I spoke first.

 

“Nana, I miss you so much, so I thought to come visit for a while”

 

Her sharp gaze didn't waver. “Why? don't you have anything important to do especially since you're married.” She said in a quiet but firm tone.

I swallowed hard, my mouth felt dry. Telling her about the company and everything will only stress her out, especially since her son, my father, had died. I couldn't put her through any more pain.

 

Even if I told her a lie I knew she would catch me so I decided to let her in on a little.

 

"Things... didn't work out." I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

 

She looked at me studying me silently. After a while of silence she placed her hand on mine gently patting on it. "They threw you out, didn't they?"

 

I nodded, staring down at my lap. Those words hit like a pinch to the gut. 

 

I had told myself I won't cry, but in front of Nana, I was just the five-year old me again. I had totally failed my father.

 

She sighed heavily but didn't press further. Instead, she squeezed my hand and said softly "I knew a day like this would come. Don't worry my child, you're home now"

 

And just like that I broke out in tears leaning into her, my face buried in her shoulder as silent sobs wrecked my body.

 

That night, I laid awake in bed, staring at the notification bar on my phone. No call, no messages.

I really lost everything. 

______________

 

Finding a job was impossible.

 

It's been weeks since I had been looking for a job with no success at all.

 

It didn't matter where I went, boutiques, bakeries, even cleaning services. The answer was all the same and it was beginning to frustrate me.

 

"We're not hiring."

 

"We don’t have any open slot."

 

"Sorry, we don't need more staff."

 

At first I thought it was just bad luck but after the tenth rejection in a row, I started to feel like the universe was making a fool of me.

 

I woke up every morning exhausted, barely able to eat, running around town looking for work and then my body began to betray me.

 

One dull morning, I finally managed to make breakfast for Nana, but the moment I settled down to eat, I felt disgusted and barely made it to the sink before throwing up.

 

It kept happening. Every morning, without fail. I tried to ignore it but Nana’s instinct kept inciting something.

She rushed over to the sink “ Aria child, what's wrong, have you gone to the doctor for a check up?” her face etched with worry as she assessed me 

 

I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, shaking my head “ No Nana, I will go tomorrow. I still have to find a job first.” 

 

“Oh dear, you look pale…. Arianna Luxen" she frowned, "how long?"

 

I flinched. She only ever used my full name when something serious was going on which was like never.

 

Then before I could react, she grabbed my hand, pressing her finger against my palm. She studied my face, then out of nowhere she pressed against my chest.

 

“ Argh” I winced as pain shot through me and her eyes widened. 

 

And just like that she threw it at me, “ You're pregnant!” 

 

That can't be.

 

For the rest of the day, I tried pushing the thought out of my mind but I finally decided to take a test.

Maybe it’s stress. Maybe it’s the exhaustion.

Or maybe it’s food poisoning.

This cannot be. Not now.

 

Staring at the two lines on the pregnancy strip, my eyes almost popped out of my sockets as the truth dawned on me.

 

I was pregnant.

 

The room spun.

 

Pregnant?

 

No, no, that wasn't possible. I mean how?

 

Darren and I barely touched each other, except for that one time...that night when he was drunk....but that shouldn't have resulted in this. Right?

 

I slumped on the toilet seat, my hand trembling as I held my stomach. 

This can’t be real.

 

A baby, I was carrying a life inside me. How was I to take care of two people when I could barely take care of myself?

 

Tears burned my eyes, but I pushed them back down, I need to be strong, not for myself but for the baby.

 

I had to survive.

 

The next morning, I walked into a small diner with a new determination, desperate for a job.

 

The sign outside clearly stated ‘Help Wanted’ and for once, my heart lifted just a little.

Maybe someone would give me a chance. Maybe today would be different.

 

I walked up to the counter, clearing my throat. "Excuse me ma'am, are you still hiring for the cleaning position?"

 

A woman behind the counter barely glanced at me. She was in her fifties, short and round, with a sharp disgusting look on her face.

 

"We're not hiring," she snapped.

 

As confused as I was at her reaction, I wasn't about to back down, “ ma please if you could just-”

 

Splash

 

I was soaked all over with dirty water tossed by the woman. I gasped as the liquid flowed down my body and seeped into my clothes, shame washing over me.

 

“Get out of here, you dirty girl!” the woman sneered.

 

I swallowed hard, biting my lips until I felt that metallic pungent taste of blood.

 

Without a word, I turned and walked away, my fists clenching at my side.

 

Laughter rang in my head as I retreated, shoulder hunched and head low.

 

“Aria, you have failed once again”