The stage

The stage lights turn on, blinding me, but I can’t mess this up; we need this. I begin to shake my hips to the music as I unbutton my dress jacket, but I don’t have any rhythm. I only took ballet in preschool and fell off the stage at my first recital. 

The memory makes me wince- I hate stages!

Mike watches me from a chair in front of the stage, he claps, but my heart is racing- I think I might have a heart attack.

 Is he going to make me take it ALL off? I mean, why haven’t I been concerned about this part till right now? If I get this job, I will take my clothes off for strangers every night.

My palms begin to sweat, and I feel a little faint as I unclasp the last button, throwing the jacket at Mike. “Hell, yeah! Goodie-Too-Shoes-Science girl! Wahoo!!” he commends me, but I can’t help but think he might be pranking me at the same time. 

Will men be yelling at me like this every night?

I smile but am holding down the stomach acid that I want to vomit. I didn’t eat breakfast, and now I am so thankful- Mike would definitely not hire me if I spewed pot-tart all over him.  

I reach for the bottom of my shirt and grab the ends, slowly lifting it and then letting it fall as Mike grins from ear to ear; I think I am doing something right. I finally pull it over my head and reveal my red lacy bra. My nipples are hard, and Mike licks his lips.

If I wasn’t so terrified and nervous right now, I might actually be turned on. I don’t know how to be sexy, but I am trying so hard. 

“Yeah! Keep going, Science girl!”

Ugh, I hate that he keeps calling me that! I thought him knowing me would be my way in, but I was the nerd in school. I can’t tell if he is actually enjoying this or if we are reverting to our old high school bully days. 

I reach for my skirt next, but there’s a zipper in the back. I didn’t think I would need to take off my clothes for the interview; silly me. I sway my hips faster as I reach behind me, trying to unzip it, but my hands are shaking and sweaty, giving the zipper no leeway. 

Fuck.

No, it’s okay. I have an idea. Maybe this is better. Since I can’t get the skirt zipper, I reach underneath and grab my red lacy thong that matches my bra. I pull it off and instantly throw it at Mike like a bad stripper movie. He catches it and smiles, and I grab the pole in the middle of the stage and spin myself around it, but soon, I am too dizzy, and the stomach acid catches up to me.

I stand up slowly, holding the pole to balance my dizzy self. I feel so sick and hold my stomach as Mike stands up, “Hey, it’s okay. Take a breath,” he tells me reassuringly, but I feel like I can’t breathe, and soon I am in a full-blown panic attack. 

I watch as Mike’s face becomes overly concerned, and he shouts toward the office, “Damon! Get out here!!” But Damon doesn’t come out; instead, a woman not wearing anything but a black thong appears from his office, and she runs toward us quickly. 

“Hey sugar, calm down,” she coos to me. Her boobs fall in my face as she bends down, and now I’m really mortified- how come I can’t be this confident when naked?

 “Get a paper bag, Mike.” She urges him. He nods, running off to retrieve one, and she smiles at me.

“First time?” she asks, and I nod as she grabs my hand, putting it on her naked chest between her breasts, “Feel how I breathe? Calm down; it’s okay.” I nod, my breathing becoming more even, and Mike appears with the paper bag. He hands it to her, and she fluffs it, giving it to me, “Here, breath in and out.” I take the bag and do what she tells me, and soon, I can’t breathe again, but now I hold back tears.

I really screwed this up. 

“I’m sorry,” I say, looking up at Mike, and he smiles reassuringly.

“It’s okay; it happens.” But I can tell that’s a lie, and he’s just trying to make me feel better. I watch as he gathers my clothes, all but my thong, and he hands them to me, and the almost naked woman helps me stand up.

“I’m Mindy,” she says, smiling, and I smile back nervously. 

“Jessica.”

“Well, I better get ready. We are going to open soon. It was nice meeting you, Jessica.” Mindy tells me as she begins to prance off. 

“Likewise,” I say, smiling, and she nods, walking back to Damon’s office, leaving Mike and me alone.

“I really am sorry,” I begin, and he pats my shoulder.

“It’s okay. Get dressed. You know, this kind of work isn’t for everyone.”

There it is.

“I just really need the money, Mike; I’m desperate.” He sighs sympathetically, and I put my clothes back on. I want to ask about my underwear, but I have embarrassed myself enough already. 

Mike walks me to the door, and I sigh as he unlocks it, “See you around, Science girl,” he says, grinning, and I shake my head.

“No, I don’t think you will,” I say sadly, walking out. He closes the door behind me, and I begin my trek back to the bus stop, feeling humiliated and stupid.

Why did I think I could do this job? I am not sexy! In fact, I have only had sex once, and it was terrible. A drunken night at prom. The type of- let’s just get this over with. It was sloppy and messy and nothing I have ever wanted to try again.

But I have applied at so many places and now I can add this to the list of failures. Tears well in my eyes as I reach the bus stop and sit down. What am I going to do? I told Julie the house would be stocked with food when she got home.

I am failing them.

I sigh as my cell phone rings and a number pops up that I don’t recognize, “Hello?”

“Hey, Science girl, it’s Mike.”

Wait! What?

“I know you weren’t expecting my call, but we want you to start work tonight. Can you be here at seven?”

“Seven?” I ask, completely floored.

“Yes, seven. You will begin as a waitress. No, taking off your clothes just yet, only a sexy outfit. Do you think you can handle that?” I nod, my excitement building.

“Yes, I’ll see you at seven.”

“Great, see you then!” The phone clicks off, and I gasp as the bus pulls up.

What the hell just happened!?