The Contract and What We Pretend To Be

If anyone had asked me that morning, I would have told you my life was.. Good.

It wasn’t perfect, but good in the way that felt safe, even predictable.

The kind of good you don’t question, because you don’t think it can disappear.

I didn’t know then how fragile that kind of good really was.

I only remembered my mom calling my name from downstairs.

“Julia! We’re going to be late!”

“I’m coming!” I shouted back, hopping on one foot, as I tried my best to pull my shoe on. By the time I got downstairs, my parents were already by the door. My dad was checking his watch, while my mom was fixing her coat, both of them, radiating with that familiar rushed energy.

“You have everything?” My mom asked me immediately, as her eyes scanned me like she could double-check by looking.

“Yes.”

“Charger?”

“Yes.”

“Emergency numbers..”

“Mom,” I laughed softly, before I walked over to hug her. “I’m not five.”

“I know,” she said, but she hugged me tighter than usual anyway.

It was at that point, when it finally sunk in.

They were really leaving, and for the first time, I wasn't going to have my aunt Ann around to watch me.

It was just for five days. A business trip. Nothing dramatic, but still, the house was going to feel different than usual.

“Remember what we talked about,” my dad added, in a tone gentler than his usual firm one.

“No parties. No staying out too late. Focus on school.”

“I will,” I promised, and I meant it. I always did.

“I trust you,” he said, and that was something that mattered to me more than anything else.

“I know.”

My mom pulled me back slightly while studying my face.

“You’ll be okay on your own?”

“I’ll be fine,” I reassured her with a small smile, and I believed that too, because at that moment, everything in my life felt stable.

I had my parents, my best friend Laila, and my boyfriend Tyler, so what could possibly go wrong?

School

When I arrived at school it was already buzzing with noises. The hallways were always loud in the morning. Too loud if you asked me, but it was how it always was.

Lockers were slamming, people were shouting across corridors, and laughter echoed off the walls. It was chaos in the most normal way. Then I spotted Laila. She was leaning against my locker like she owned it, scrolling on her phone.

“You’re late,” she said without looking up.

“I’m two minutes late,” I responded, as I rolled my eyes.

“That’s late for you.”

“Fair enough.”

She then finally glanced up, with a grin covering her face.

“You look nervous. Why?”

“I’m not nervous.”

“You are. I can tell.”

I sighed while I continued to open my locker.

“My parents left this morning.”

Her expression instantly softened.

“Oh. Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” I said, shrugging lightly. “It’s just weird, you know.”

“You’re basically free,” she said, nudging me. “This is your moment.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that.

“Right, free to do homework and go to bed early,” I replied, earning a disappointed eye role.

“How boring.”

“Don’t you mean responsible?” I corrected, making her shrug.

“Same thing,” she muttered.

I was about to respond when my shoulder suddenly jerked forward as someone slammed into me. The impact was sharp, painful and nonetheless, intentional.

“Watch it,” a voice said, dripping with false innocence, and I already knew who it was before I had even turned.

Brianna.

She stood there with her perfect hair. Perfect clothes, and the perfect smile that didn’t even reach her eyes.

“Sorry,” she added, not sounding sorry at all, making Laila immediately straighten her back, as she glared at her.

“That didn’t look like an accident.” She hissed, as Brianna tilted her head slightly, while her eyes flicked between us.

“You’re right, it wasn’t,” she said plainly.

At least she wasn’t lying about it.

I forced my expression to stay neutral, as I finally opened my mouth.

“It’s fine.”

But my words made Laila turn to me, like I had just betrayed her.

“It’s not fine.”

Laila was right, I knew it wasn’t fine, but it was exactly what Brianna wanted. She wanted to get under my skin and make me cause a scene, but I didn’t want that. Not this early in the day, and especially not with her, because the truth was, it hadn’t always been like that.

“We used to be friends,” I said quietly, mostly to Laila, only earning a small mocking laugh from Brianna.

“Middle school doesn’t count.”

But it did to me. All the sleepovers, secrets and trust that we once had shared. All of it was gone and replaced with.. This.

“What do you want, Brianna?” I asked, while I continued to keep my voice calm, as her gaze sharpened slightly.

“Nothing,” she said in a high-pitched voice. “Just thought I’d say hi.”

She then walked off before any of us could respond while Laila exhaled sharply.

“She’s the worst.”

I nodded, but still, something about that interaction lingered. A feeling I couldn’t quite name.

Tyler

I reached into my locker when I felt arms wrapping around me from behind. The warmth and a familiar scent reached my nose, making me feel jittery.

“Missed me?” Tyler murmured against my ear, making me smile instantly.

“Tyler..”

He spun me around before I could finish, pulling me into a proper hug, and just like that, everything felt lighter again.

He smelled like grass and laundry detergent and something distinctly him.

“You’re early,” I pointed out.

“Had practice prep,” he shrugged. “But it was worth it.”

“For me?” I asked, as he grinned.

“Obviously.”

I rolled my eyes, but I couldn’t stop smiling.

“Are you coming tonight?” he asked, more casually than the way his eyes searched mine.

“The party?”

“Yeah. Daniel’s throwing it after the game, remember? Everyone’s going.”

I hesitated, which he immediately noticed.

“What’s wrong?”

“My parents are out of town,” I said slowly. “I kind of promised them I wouldn’t do anything reckless.”

My words immediately made his expression drop. It wasn’t dramatic, but just enough to see the disappointment in his eyes.

“Oh.”

I felt guilt twist in my chest. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to go, it was just.. I had promised.

“It’s just for five days,” I quickly added. “I don’t want to mess it up.”

“Right. Yeah, of course.”

He stepped back slightly, running a hand through his hair.

“I mean.. Maybe I shouldn’t go either.”

“What? No,” I immediately said. “You should go.”

He looked confused as he raised his brows.

“You just said..”

“I said I shouldn’t,” I interrupted. “Not you.”

“That doesn’t really seem fair,” he started excusing, making me take a step closer, lowering my voice.

“You’re team captain, Tyler. You kind of have to go.”

That earned a small smile.

“Have to?”

“Social responsibility,” I said, trying to sound serious, which made him laugh softly.

“You’re unbelievable.”

“Just go,” I nudged him. “Have fun.”

He studied me for a second longer, before his shoulder fell down with a soft exhalation.

“Okay.”

And before I could overthink anything, he leaned in and kissed me. A soft but familiar kind, that made my stomach buzz in a safe way.

“I’ll still text you though,” he murmured.

“I’ll be asleep,” I teased.

“We’ll see.”