3

(Willow's POV)

After a lot of thinking and consideration, I avoided my mum. I couldn't bring myself to look at her even after so many apologies and ways to get me to talk to her.

I sat by the river imagining what my life would be like after this. I've made my decision and there's no going back.

"Finally" I heard his voice. Do I really want this? Am I ready? Well, I perfectly know the answers I needed.

"Jordan right?" I turned to him. It took me a week to make this decision and I know he waited.

"I guess she told you everything?" He walked past me. "She still remembers me" 

"My mum is the last person I want to talk about. She's in my past, I don't wanna hear or see her ever again" I breathed. "I'm ready to accept my identity, that's who I wanna be" I simply said to him because the sooner the better. I saw him smile. "What's amusing?"

"The fact that you think it's that easy. You don't have a single idea how or what being a wolf is" He rolled his eyes. 

"Then teach me" I commanded. He quickly moved closer to me.

"You don't tell me what to do" he said angrily.

"And what's up with your temper? Did I say anything wrong? Okay please Jordan, teach me" I said to him looking straight into his eyes.

He placed a hand on my shoulders and pressed me down so I was on the same level as his chest instead.

"Ouch" I cried.

"Next time you talk to me, never look me in the eyes and don't you dare stand up to me" he pushed me to the grass.

What an asshole.

I quickly stood up.

"Will you teach me?" I asked. He stared at the water.

"You'll have to do everything I say, with no question" he suddenly said.

"Yes, I will" I eagerly nodded. I'm beginning to like this.

"Take off the necklace" he commanded.

"But...I promised…"

"I'm leaving" He started walking away.

"Wait! Wait! I'm taking it off" I followed him.

"The next time you complain, you'll never see me again" he turned to me. He watched me take it off and that was it.

"What next? Do I get to meet the pack? What section will I be appointed to? And the alpha? I want to meet the luna!" I was already excited and a strange heat building inside of me.

"Calm down, horsie! You're not part of the pack, yet. I need to know if you can be one of us, if I can trust you. Then I'll take you to the pack house. But firstly, you need to learn how to shift" he said but I immediately felt weak at the knees. 

What is happening to me? Why all this pain and heat? I felt like I was being massaged by the sun.

"Argh!" I laid on my stomach. "Goddamn!" I looked at him with tears in my eyes. "What is happening?" I cried holding my stomach. I felt like my skin was ripped in chunks, slowly.

"This is what happens when you tame your wolf. It is desperate to be free. So free it" He sternly said to me.

"How!?" I shouted and some of the birds on the nearby trees flew away. 

"Let go! Stop holding back!" He commanded.

"How!" I shouted again. He sighed kneeling beside me.

"Stop fighting the pain, accept it" he said again.

"I...can't! Necklace please" I begged him. "Argh! Ouch!" I sobbed.

"No! You need to accept your wolf Willow" he calmly said.

"No! Ugh! Please Jordan!" I held him by the collar.

He pushed me off him and picked my necklace from the grass placing it around my neck which calmed me down immediately.

"Thank you" I breathed laying on my back.

"For what exactly? You are such a coward" he stood up. "I'm leaving"

"Wait!" I tried to stand up but I felt so weak.

"Meet me back here the same time tomorrow" he said, disappearing into the woods. I would have followed him secretly of course and found out where he lives if not for the excruciating pain in my joints.

"That will be fine" I sipped the coffee Iris served me in her room. We now share the same bed. I don't know how I went from hating this place to living with my new best friend. 

"You mostly eat meat, don't you want something leafy!? Maybe a salad?" Iris frowned her face when I emptied the fourth plate of breast wings.

"Salad? I don't think I'll be satisfied. Do you have beef?" I asked. My sudden uncontrollable hunger for meat is clear to me now but there's no way I could tell her.

"No"

"I have to leave, I have a very important thing to take care of" I said, wearing my hoodie.

"What about the job you got?" She asked.

"Right now, that's the last thing I want to talk about" I shrugged. "I called and told them I don't want the job. Right now, I'm not in the state of working. I can't even think right and I have a lot on my plate"

"What about your mother? She was here yesterday and today too"

"Oh please Iris! Tell her I'm okay" I turned to her.

I hated the fact that I'm making my mum suffer but I can't bring myself to forgive her for lying to me and trying to deny me my identity.

How long did she think she could hide it? If she never wanted me to find out, why did she bring me back into their territory?

"Where are you going? And where did you go yesterday?" She suddenly looked excited.

"Um, nowhere mummy. I just want a fresh breeze" I smiled.

"Have you seen the boy next door? He is such a cutie" she giggled.

I couldn't believe she thinks I'm going out to see a guy.

"No, not interested" I said. Maybe because I got my eyes on someone else. I smiled.

"Who is he?" She rushed to me holding my hand.

"Who!?"

"The guy you just thought about with a smile" she grinned. I pushed her off.

"I have to go" I ran out.

Locating the river was now easy because I'm already acquainted with the place.

The river is my happy place and this attraction I have towards Jordan is unexpected but yet magical. I'm not the type to have high school crushes or fall in love with the cute boy next door but Jordan is one of those things I have to figure out.

What if he already has a girlfriend? 

What exactly are you saying Willow? You don't even like him, you just admire him and I'm sure you'll get over him just like the rest.

The last time I was with Jordan, I felt a sudden pull towards him. I can't explain it but it felt good for the second it lasted. He looks like someone that can never be romantic but I'm sure he has a soft spot somewhere.

This is not what I should be thinking of, I know. And what did he mean by accepting the pain?

I never want to feel what I felt yesterday. I just want to shift just like in the movies and see what I look like.

What color of wolf would I be? Honestly, I can't wait because I feel like I'm in a dream I don't want to wake up from.

Who wouldn't want to be a werewolf?

Jordan was nowhere to be found as I looked around.

I sat by the river for almost an hour before he showed up. 

"You're late" I heard his voice. I stood to my feet.

"Me? You're late, not me" I frowned.

"If you'd come here earlier, you'd have met me" He said indifferently.

"But I've been waiting!" I argued.

"If I say you're late, then you're late" He said.

"Why are you so damn arrogant?" I asked.

"I'm used to doing what I want" he folded his hands.

"But I am not good at taking orders" I folded mine.

"And I'm good at making people do what I want. I always get what I want. Are you ready?" He stretched out his hand to me. I placed the necklace in his palm.

"Don't hold back, you have to accept your wolf. That means you'll have to feel every ounce of the pain or this won't work and you'll hurt yourself. This should have happened a long time ago, that's why you're having a hard time" he sighed.

Is he complaining?

"You think I don't know? And this isn't easy you know" I want to get this over and done with. "Do you know the excruciating pain I feel?" I groveled.

"I do, do you think I magically woke up a wolf? Everything in life has a process" he knelt beside me.

"Then help me not make me feel worse"

"What do you want me to do? Share the pain with you?" He scoffed.

"You're unbelievable Jordan!"

"C'mon, you need to tap into your wolf. It wants to be free!" He was impatient!? Can't he be at least sympathetic for once? He has to be the worst person on this earth because what the fuck!? Can't he see I'm suffering?

"Here goes"