LOGINBRIAN
“Do we really have to visit the Silverclaw pack?” Aliya asked from her perch in front. “It is unavoidable, they are the hosts for this year's ceremony,” I answered offhandedly, watching the green scenery as we drove by. My eyes stayed on the passing trees; something out there was calling to me. I could feel its slithery fingers crawling up my skin, its cold voice whispering in my ears. “You know what I mean? The pack could always come; you could have stayed, Alpha.” Aliya; proud, ferocious, and fiercely loyal. She was a great asset to our pack. Having her as a beta helped me feel easier on most days. Even now, her sharp eyes pierced the woods looking out for potential threats. Most importantly, she was one of the very few I trusted with the true depths of my predicament. She knew and understood. “I also need to find her.” My hand rested on my chin, and my gaze remained set outside. “It will happen regardless, Liya. It is best to let nature take its course.” I hoped tonight would reveal Aliya's mate as well. She had given enough, it was time for her to receive. “Is it worth it?” She asked, through the mind-link this time. We were not alone; two other packmates were in the car with us. One sat behind with me, and the other was the designated driver. “Yes.” And it was. The moon goddess would give another mate, courtesy of her unwarranted hatred, but this time, I would piss on her pearly face and win. It was nighttime when we got to the Silverclaw pack and the ceremony was already underway. Several jungle vehicles lined the area, and their presence clawed at me. We were more like the humans in times like this. By tradition, these wolves should have shifted and run here, but the customs were fizzling out these days and I couldn't blame them. A little more and we would live in parallel worlds. “We leave at dawn,” I announced through the mind-link. We were barely a handful of packmates and seven jungle cars. Our numbers were twenty in total, sixteen males and four women. The Bloodmoons were rarely mated to members outside the pack. They were grunts of acknowledgment as they went into the packgrounds as a group, heading for the lights and noise. I alone remained seated in the vehicle. “Alpha?” Aliya called, peering into the vehicle. Questions lined her brown gaze. “Give me a moment, Liya.” Was my mumbled reply. She nodded simply and I was left alone. There was an unsettling feeling prickling my spine. My wolf was uneasy at the feel of so many other unknown wolves, and the feel of her. She was out there, waiting to be found. My fist tightened, the extended claws piercing the skin of my palm. Droplets of red splattered on my blue denim, staining the material. I forced the uneasy feeling away, putting my wolf in check. Tonight need not be harder than it should be. I stepped out of the vehicle, heading for the light as well. The packgrounds looked very similar to ours; cabins dotted the expanse of land, trees interrupting the trail of houses now and then. They all sat empty, and bulbs and oil lanterns lit the way, to the noise up ahead, but my wolf had other ideas. What we sought wasn't up ahead. I turned in a different direction, letting my keen sense of smell lead the way to what I was truly after. I walked for a few minutes, weaving through the cabins. The air was warm and moist, the smell of her pulling me forward. The dirt and dry leaves crunching beneath my booted feet were the only sounds apart from the shouts and howls coming from the other direction. I briefly wondered what she was doing instead of being at the gathering. Was she underage? The thought was repulsive, my insides churning at the possibility. Mating a child was surely an act the goddess would not allow. Or perhaps she was out here with someone else. A boy she wishes were her mate? A surprisingly strong surge of jealousy and anger plagued me at the thought. If she was with another, then I would not avoid bloodshed tonight. My fangs nipped my lips at the thought of spilling another's blood. I felt the heavy presence of many up ahead and when I cleared the cabins, I came upon a huge building. It was more than five times bigger than the other cabins around. The pack house. And my mate was in there. It was wrong by custom to enter a pack house without invitation, but custom be damned, my mate was here, and hell if I was going to wait on an invitation to get what was mine. It was a mating ceremony, and there was a temporary truce during this period. Hence, the pack house was left unguarded. Perfect. Her smell dragged me forward. I approached the door, unsure of what to expect, but what I wasn't expecting when I pushed the doors open was my mate, elbows locked with one another as they laughed and sipped drinks. I could not stop the transformation of my nose into a snout and the elongation of my fangs. “Mate!” I growled angrily. ***** VIOLET (Hours earlier) “It's time to kiss and make up already,” Liz sighed tiredly. “No,” Me and Hunter echoed, concentration not wavering. Our eyes were caught in a fierce stare that neither one was willing to break yet. “But she needs to try out her outfit for tonight.” I barfed internally at the idea. I would not lose this game, Hunter better not lose as well. I needed as much free time as possible before Liz exalted her evil plans. A side of Hunter's lips lifted in an annoyingly familiar smirk. My heart skipped a beat, and I almost lost right then. My hands fisted, he wouldn't… but his triumphant smirk said he would. “Her outfit is definitely more important, so I concede,” He said, his smirk becoming a full-blown shit-eating grin. “Just this time.” I would kill him if he wasn't my only sibling. “Yayyy,” Liz clapped like a giddy child at a food festival. “Now we can try your dress, and I can go back to having my full family with me.” The warmth of her words seeped into my body, and I found my own lips lifting in a smile as well. Maybe the dress wouldn't be so bad. I was wrong. Horribly wrong as I soon found out. “I look ridiculous,” I deadpanned. “You look just fine,” Elizabeth replied. But the hesitant way her eyes raked over me from head to toe was a dead giveaway. Hunter stood behind her as they both appraised me, and he was barely holding in his laughter. The dress was a ridiculous pink thing with ruffles for sleeves and a collar. Its flay skirt stopped just before my knees, the itchy fabric making me want to rip it off. “Hun, what do you think?” She asked, angling her body to look at him. His laughter was immediately hidden. “It looks great to me.” He said with the straightest face. I gave him the nastiest side eye I could muster. “You see?” She turned her attention back to me, rubbing a hand over her bump; it was all she did these days. “I can barely see above this!” I pointed to the ruffled collar that was almost poking my eye. Perhaps I was exaggerating a little, but it was true—to an extent. * Hunter lost it then, breaking into loud laughter. “Hunter…” she whined. “I'm… sorry...” He managed between bouts of laughter. “But where did you find such a contraption, Liz?” “I appreciate your help, Liz,” I butted in, trying to soothe her. “But I doubt this dress is appropriate for tonight.” “She won't be finding a mate if she wears that,” Hunter added, breaking into another round of laughter. I was tempted to laugh along, but Elizabeth would not like that. “Hunter!” She tried to sound stern, but there was laughter twinkling in her eyes as well. Shaking his head in an apology, Hunter turned away, his shoulders hunched as he laughed even harder. “What do we do?” Liz whined, her shoulders going up and down as she sighed. “That's the most decent dress I could get.” Hunter was immediately back at her side, rubbing her shoulders in soothing circles. It baffled me as to why she was so worried about this. I did not have a mate and I would escape the ceremony as soon as I could. Hardly anything to get so stressed over. “It'll be fine, Liz,” he murmured, pressing a muted kiss to the side of her head. The crinkled lines on her forehead smoothed out and she broke into a peaceful smile, her hand still rubbing her belly. They were perfection. I wanted this. I did. But I knew more than anyone else that a pink dress would not get me it. “Jeans and tee it is,” I announced, breaking their little moment. Hunter guided her to a padded chair, helping her sit gently. “Okay, but your nicest pair, Vi,” Liz warned, but her voice didn't carry any bite. “Yes ma'am,” I replied, heading for the door. I wanted to get out of my pink trap as soon as possible. I sent one last look to them before I left the room. Hunter knelt at her feet, pressing kisses to her clothed abdomen, while Liz leaned backward, her face to the ceiling, and her hands stroked through my brother's red hair. Yep, a pink dress would not get such a good bargain. When sunlight finally gave way to the dark, and the moon finally graced the skies, I was ready, anxiously so. Fear raced my heart in fast beats while hope thudded softly, unable to catch up. Soon, the ceremony began. I nursed my first cup of (coconut drink) while scanning the area from my corner. A bonfire burned in a makeshift pit and packmates were scattered around in little groups, conversing. Hunter sat on the floor far off, Liz nestled between his legs as he whispered things to her. As soon as our first guests arrived—the Furrow pack, a packmate was claimed; Iliyana. She had turned for the first time the month before, and I watched with a hooded gaze as she was bitten and claimed before us all. PS, she wasn't wearing a pink dress. Sighing, I looked away, focusing on my coconut drink. I rested on the wall of the cabin where I stood, waiting for the perfect moment to dart away. By the arrival of our next guests, a lot more wolves found their mates. I was itching on the inside, I was no longer in the dress, but its itchiness stayed with me, urging me to pick my skin apart. The crowd steadily grew until the whole area was teeming with wolves. My discomfort was growing as well. “Enjoying your evening?” His voice came from behind me. “Nahh, but it's early yet. How about you?” I asked as the black-eyed boy came to stand beside me. “It is early.” I waited gingerly, my muscles ready for what would come next, but I still wasn't prepared enough. In a split second, Coda crouched to the floor, using a leg to sweep both of mine off the ground. I reacted a moment too late. My drink fell to the side, and my body kissed the floor in a bone-shaking fall. “Ouch,” I groaned, forcing my body upwards. “Coda,” I growled, rubbing a hand over my shoulder. “You need to react faster,” He advised, offering a hand to help me up. I slapped his hand away, resting my body on the wall instead. “Come on, you look like you need to escape.” He urged. “Real nice, sweep a girl off her feet and offer her escape. Also, the Alpha will have our heads,” I retorted sharply, looking off into the crowd to find the said Alpha. “Dad won't notice, come on and I doubt our mates are here.” With the dim lighting, I tried to read his eyes; perhaps he was more bothered about this than he let on. This wasn't his first mating ceremony without finding a mate, and it must be getting to him already. It was also a good enough excuse to sneak away. So, I placed my hand in his, allowing him to pull me up. Discreetly, we slipped into the rows of cabins, leaving the ceremony behind. A few minutes later, we were at the pack house, and I could finally breathe. * The interior was dark until Coda flipped a switch. Yellow bulbs blinked on, revealing an empty entrance area. Only the long table occupied this space, long enough to seat at least thirty. The children and aged packmates who couldn't attend were here and asleep. “Sit, I'll get us something to drink,” he ordered as he disappeared farther into the packhouse. The walls of this building were as familiar as my own home. Hunter and I had spent many days and nights here in the aftermath of Dad and Mum's deaths. Coda appeared a moment later, holding two cups of fresh orange juice. “There you go,” he placed one in front of me and sat beside me with his. I eyed the drink, “There better be nothing in my drink that shouldn't be there,” I warned. Between Coda and Hunter, growing up had been equal parts fun and trouble. He raised my plastic to his mouth, taking a big sip, “See, all safe.” I accepted the cup back, raising it to my mouth. The sweet taste of the cool drink washed away the lingering discomfort from the ceremony. There was a companionable silence as we both sipped our drinks. “On many days, I catch myself wishing you were my mate.” He suddenly said. How easy things would be if that were the case, perhaps I would be happy. But I would never wish that on Coda, he deserved better. “Me too, Coda, me too.” I answered honestly. “Elbow lock?” He asked, lifting his drink and wiggling his eyebrows. Laughing, I lifted my drink as well. I may not have a mate, but I had this and this was everything. Our drinks spilled as we locked our elbows, laughter accompanying every movement. The ceremony outside was all forgotten and we were cocooned in a world of our own until the door was forcefully pushed open. I looked beyond Coda to the creature that stood at the open door, my breath frozen in my lungs. “Mate!” It growled.VIOLETWhen I returned to the sitting area, I was dressed for training, and Brian was still there exactly as I'd left him.He lifted hollow eyes to me and my heart clenched hard enough to make me think I was having a heart attack. I lowered my eyes, focusing on his nose.“Let's go,” I muttered, waiting for him to rise to his feet.“Violet,” My name was a plea on his lips—lips that I needed to look away from.“Brian, I do not want to talk about this. You said we were going to train, and train we shall.”And that was all it was going to be. He wanted coldness? I would be the iciest winter he's ever encountered.“No, let me speak,” he rasped. I forgot the plan and looked into his eyes. There, I saw conflicting emotions and understanding? He—Brian, understood me?“Listen Violet, I want to be better. I'm trying to be.” He swallowed hard and looked away, his Adam's apple bobbling up and down. “But it's hard to deserve you.”I pinched the bridge of my nose. He was trying? Of course, and the
VIOLET Hearing him through the walls was a far cry from actually seeing him.My hand shook when I reached for my cup of milk. And on second thoughts, I took my hand back, I was fairly certain I would spill everything if I did lift the cup.Almost a full moon since my training with Aliya had started, and I would admit that some part of me had waited for Brian. It was supposed to be fourteen days after all, but when he didn't come, I assumed Aliya had fully taken on the role of everything.I was wrong. I don't know if I was pleased about that. But the strong tingling inside of me told me someone else was. She was way more dominant these days.He strolled in like it was nobody's business (it wasn't, it was his cabin after all), looking like a piece of cake I wanted to eat. Well, not me, but me, obviously.Calvin offered a sort of greeting, but I didn't hear, my attention was on the things I wanted but couldn't have.“Your training will resume today,” he announced like he was talking ab
VIOLETThe air between Calvin and me remained stiff, but I was finally ready to do something about it.He waited for me, paying unnecessary attention to the tree I usually trained with.I heaved a deep sigh that hurt my sensitive ribs. I wouldn't make this easy for me if I were him. And even then, I would still do my best to fix things. I was wrong, it was easy to see that.Calvin was not very tall. My head stopped at his shoulders and I was closer to the ground than most.“I'm sorry,” I blurted as I reached his side. Better to get it over with quickly.His eyes swung to me, then back to the tree, before coming to rest on me again. “What?” “I'm sorry,” I repeated.He gestured to me, “She's sorry,” he said to the tree, ignoring me.I briefly wondered if he had gone mad and I forced back the chuckle that was threatening to escape.“Calvin, I was speaking to you.”“Didn't seem like you were,” he muttered back, his focus still on the tree. “Are you ready to leave?”I sighed again. He re
VIOLET Calvin was darting weird looks at me.Whatever Harriette did to distract him, it worked for longer than I'd expected and when he opened her back door, I was right there. He knew I'd gone somewhere, but he didn't know where.Now as he hammered a piece of nail into a chair Harriette had claimed was rickety, his eyes kept coming back to me. I wished he'd miss and hammer a finger, then he could feel as terrible as I was feeling.I was off the mark by several inches, but for the first time, I wondered if being on mark would have been better.Harriette showered him in praise as he worked. Now that Harriette had reinforced that Cain was okay, I wanted to get away from here, but I didn't want to be alone. And I didn't want to be here either.I played with the bowl of fruits she'd set out for me, but the sliced apples and blueberries weren't doing a lot for my mood. My one thought remained the same; how did I escape this mayhem untouched? What was the path forward?Most of the day pas
VIOLET I needed to see Harriette, and someone else. I was antsy. This was an opportunity window that wouldn't remain open for long. So I needed to do something quickly. Calvin was here, wolfing down all that was left of breakfast. Scatterbrained and light as he may seem, he was quite attentive and had done the best job of babysitting me so far. His presence was calming, and his top-notch humor had me looking forward to every word out of his mouth. He made me forget, that this was a gilded cage, and I was a prisoner being sent to battle my executioners. I was told this was for my protection, but I knew deep down that after that first failed attempt, it would be hard to get another try. So there was only one way; I would burn the cage to the fucking ground. But before then… “I want to visit Harriette,” I said to my babysitter. I was supposed to be at training, but after that incident two days ago, Aliya had been busy. I waited for her to call on me now and it seemed lik
VIOLET Could trees cry? If they could, I'm certain this one would. I rained hits on it; elbows, fists, feet, shoulders, the weight of my whole body.“Liya would be mad if her tree dies,” Calvin casually commented. Day ten of my training with Aliya. Four days more and I would return to training with Brian. Brian, whom I hadn't seen in days. We slept in the same cabin, sure. But it was like we had made a pact to avoid each other. When one was in, the other was out. I did not know how to feel about going back to spending time with him. But those were worries for the future.Right now, I gave Liya’s tree a proper beating. I was earlier than usual for training, and she wasn't here yet. She should never have introduced me to it, if she worried about it dying.The mood suddenly changed. Calvin, who was playing with leaves, was instantly alert. “Aliya will not be coming today, we need to go.”Aliya had never missed a day of training, “Did she say that?” “She didn't have to.”I knew then







