CHAPTER 1: FALL APART

CAITLIN

“I’m sorry…”

The words buzzed through the phone’s speaker. No, those weren’t the words I wanted to hear. My chest tightened, I couldn't breathe.

“Please, give me more time. I swear, I’ll–”

“I have given you so much time already, Cait. I understand you’re going through a rough time but I also need money.” Mrs. Darcey said softly, her voice a little shaky, “If I don’t get rent, I don’t get money. I’m so sorry.”

She was right. There was just so much time a landlady could possibly give a tenant. At least she wasn’t suing. God bless her. Staring at the termination letter in my hands, I knew it was hopeless begging. Without a job, how do I pay rent? Just a month after securing a job in the hospital, I already lost it.

“I understand. Thank you, Mrs. Darcey, I really appreciate your help…” my voice broke, “I’ll move my things this evening.” 

Good thing I had Colton– or so I thought.

“You don’t have to–”

“No, I want to. You’ve already done so much. I have to go now.”

“Alright, if you say so. I’ll let you get back to work now.”

I hung up. The tears that had clouded my vision fell freely as I slid down to the floor of the changing room.

“I wish my life could get better.” I murmured, hugging my knees tightly.

The doorknob twisted.

“Is anyone here?” 

I sprang to my feet. I wasn’t about to let anyone see me like this– a mess. 

“Yes– ah… give me a minute.”

Rushing over to the sink, I turned on the tap, splashing water on my face. Dabbing my face with a face towel, I hurried to the door and unlocked it. I stared at my reflection. My heart sank.

You’ll get through this. You’ll be alright.

“Are you–” 

“I’m fine.” I said under my breath, hurrying through the door to prevent a conversation I knew I couldn't handle.

In my hurry, I bumped into a hard human wall. 

“Sorry I–”

 My words were lost the moment I stared into the eyes of the man before me. There was something in his eyes I couldn’t explain. A smug smile played on his lips as he sized me down.

How could one smile and still look so evil yet handsome?

“What’s your name?” his voice was croaky, his gaze intense.

I opened my mouth to speak but words failed me. That wasn’t the expression or question you expect when you bump into someone.

“Caitlin, Caitlin Stevens.” I choked out.

“I see.”

His smile and dark eyes unsettled me. Pulling away, I hurried down the hall. I could feel his eyes boring holes in my back. My legs felt a little unsteady.

Once I got outside the hospital, I took out my phone and dialed Colton’s number. No answer. He once asked me to move in with him but I wanted my own space. I had the keys after all.

The walk home wasn’t quiet. I had a lot to say to myself in my head. Packing didn’t take much time. I basically had nothing.

The few valuables I had were sold and the money went into repaying loans I didn't take. After ordering an Uber, I toured the small apartment that used to be home. My fingers brushed against the walls, touching every corner, every dent, every memory. Then I picked up my most priced possession. The photo my mom and dad had taken the day before they were killed. 

“Mom, dad, I miss you so much.”

If only you were here.

My mind wandered back to that day. How excited they were about their date that evening. I smiled at the memory. Their death was the beginning of my misfortune. 

“One day, when I somehow get past all these tests and trials, I will avenge you two, I promise.” I whispered, hugging the photo tight against my chest as tears fell freely.

The possibility of getting revenge one day was the only reason I kept pushing no matter what. They say God tests you before handing you perfect blessings and for that, I’ll wait, I'll endure.

I took a long deep breath, wiped the corners of my eyes, then picked up my suitcase and dragged my feet out of the apartment. Right at the entrance of the building, my phone buzzed. “Your driver has arrived.”

The silver Camry was parked right outside. The wind caressed my skin, tossing my hair in my face— a good cover.

“Good afternoon.” I muttered, getting into the back of the car. 

“Good afternoon, Miss.” His voice was gentle.

The old man didn't try to start any conversation which I appreciated. The car came to a halt at Colton's.

I struggled with my suitcase for a moment.

“Do you need help with that, Miss?”

“No!” I snapped. “I mean, no. Thank you.” I said softly, yanking the suitcase with all my might and stumbling backwards.

“God’s grace be with you, child. I wish you luck.”

Those words left me frozen in place, my eyes stung. The car drove off before I could collect myself. How did he know? I needed luck, a little bit of God’s favour. I walked slowly towards Colton’s front door, searching for the key in my bag. Unlike the usual ritual, I found the key before I got to the door.

Inserting the key in the keyhole, I twisted the key– at least I tried but it wouldn’t budge. Is he home? 

“Colton?”

No answer. I tried to ring the doorbell but it wasn't working. Given no other choice but to go through the back, I went around the building to the back door. I put the key in the keyhole and the lock clicked immediately.

“Thank God!”

I walked in, breathing a sigh of relief. The sight of Colton's huge picture portrait hung high on the wall of the seating room. A soft smile played on my lips. Finally, an escape from all my worry. All I needed now was his strong arms wrapped around me. The sound of a loud moan and then a grunt, disrupted my thoughts, leaving me frozen in place. 

Of all things you could imagine, Caitlin!

I shook my head, refusing to believe it was real. Walking towards the bedroom, the sounds grew louder. I could hear the sound of flesh slapping together.

“Oh, yes! Slam harder, baby!” the woman moaned through gritted teeth.

“You’re so fucking sweet, Bella.”

For some reason, I couldn't scream, didn’t even try to. I pushed the door open to find Colton butt naked in bed with a woman, slamming hard like his life depended on each thrust. The woman’s eyes caught mine, a dark grin spread across her lips. Her grin was quickly replaced by a twisted expression, open mouth, knitted brow and a loud  moan, then a scream as he slammed even harder, chasing release. I should have screamed, run… something. I just stood there frozen in place while my heart felt like it was being turned into pieces.

“Colton, how could you?” my voice was a breathless, shaky whisper. 

Either he didn’t hear me or he didn’t just care. He thrust one last time, spilling into her as he convulsed, groaning, panting with her name on his lips. He rolled over, his blonde hair sticking to his forehead. His eyes found me. Maybe I expected an apology… something– anything of that sort. 

“Get out.”