Chapter 6: That Night

I can't remember how or when I realized that I had these feelings toward Grimoire Azriel. At first, I admired him because of the stories my father told me about him. Until—until I started seeing him more often. Until I discovered for myself how incredibly lovable he was. I couldn't stop myself from falling for him.

 

How many days has it been, or weeks? Since the last time I saw him after that night. Not once has he come here. And I also restrained myself from going to him. Until one of the things I feared finally happened.

 

They're here. I can't believe they're here! I was too excited to see her. Even though I'm angry at her. Even though I hate her. When I saw the joy in her eyes as I showed her to her room and she saw that pair of police uniforms, I was happy. My eyes welled up with tears. In that moment, I felt the warmth of a mother.

 

I cried when I returned to my room. I don't know when I became this weak, but I forced myself to dry my own tears.

 

Azriel and I haven’t spoken since they arrived. He didn't even look at me, even though I occasionally glanced at him. He just kept ignoring me like he didn’t know me. His eyes were always on Agatha. Always on my mother. Just her. It’s like she was the only one he saw, and it irritated me. I can’t count how many times I restrained myself from attacking or confronting him. I tried to distance myself and stop... hoping that maybe, like others, if I did that, he would come looking for me, chase after me, and choose me.

 

That afternoon, I went downstairs to cook. I didn’t want my father to get mad if I didn’t take care of things. I found him in the kitchen, busy drinking coffee.

 

"Are you going to cook?" my face softened when he asked, and I nodded my head.

 

"So that when mom wakes up, she can eat." I gently said, and I saw how his lips curved into a smile. Even now, I am not used to calling him "Trevor." If I didn’t know better, I would think they were two different people.

 

"Mom," he repeated the word I used for Agatha, and he didn’t say anything else. I continued what I was doing, knowing he occasionally watched me. I was almost done when I noticed him stand up.

 

"I’ll go see her. She might be awake." I glanced at him and nodded until he finally left.

 

Not long after, I heard voices coming into the kitchen.

 

"Wow, it smells great! You're so diligent, m'lady," Calum said excitedly, cutting off whatever he and Azriel were talking about. Azriel entered with his hands in his pockets and sat down.

 

"Not yet time to eat," they both looked at each other and then at me. I avoided making eye contact with Azriel, as I still struggled to hold myself back. I looked at Calum instead.

 

"We’ll call them later, but she’s probably still talking to dad." I softly said, turning away briefly to wipe my hands.

 

"I knew it! This stubborn wolf over here! He's starving!" 

 

"Idiot, don’t put this all on me. You were the one complaining about being hungry earlier." His voice—despite just a few days—I missed hearing it.

 

"But you’re hungry too! I know, even if you don’t admit it!" Calum's noisy banter made me shake my head. From the corner of my eye, I saw Azriel stand up, so I finally turned to look at him.

 

"Oh? Where are you going?"

 

"Agatha, she needs to eat. She might be hungry." A sharp pang hit my chest. It felt like I had lost my breath for a moment. My chest tightened briefly before I found myself following them. The two of them continued bickering as we went upstairs until Azriel opened the door without knocking. My father and mother’s surprised faces greeted us.

 

"Woah, we didn’t know you two were having a heart-to-heart talk." He really knows how to act.

 

"I told him to wait and come later, but he insisted. Now’s the first time the two of them are finally together." Calum scolded Azriel, and Azriel just glared at him. Meanwhile, I stood still, staring at them, especially at my mother, my arms crossed.

 

"I prepared the food you cooked, Trevor. Let her eat first." They nodded immediately. I didn’t want to say that I was the one who cooked. Dad understood that, so he didn’t protest, nor did the other two.

 

The three of them went down first, leaving dad and me in the room. Once they left, we both walked outside to the back of the house to talk.

 

"Are you sure about that? You’re going to stay in Blizmoor?" I couldn’t stop myself from asking about what he said earlier.

 

"Hmm, that way… they won’t suspect that the mortal Agatha is important to me. If anything, it’ll be as if I never left her side. Trevor is here, isn’t he? I just need to work in Blizmoor. So, for now, you stay here. I want you to keep her." I shook my head.

 

"No, she won’t remember if she stays here." If she’s where the real Lucien is, she should be there too.

 

"Then let’s see..." I looked at dad. His face was serious. It was clear he was deep in thought.

 

"Let’s bet on her reaction. If she insists on going to Blizmoor and following me for whatever reason, let her. If not, stay." I nodded, even though I was still confused by what he wanted. But it was still a good idea. It was a better plan because, even if she doesn’t remember dad, deep down, she won’t let herself be far from him.

 

The next day, Azriel’s cold treatment toward me continued. Even during our meeting about the plan and how we would act, he remained casual in conversation. Just to avoid suspicion from those with us. I endured it and focused more on the plan, even though I didn’t feel good about it.

 

Our plan moved forward until… someone entered my room. His scent lingered inside my nose, and even though I wanted to turn and jump toward him, my clenched fists stopped me.

 

"Agatha and I have agreed to leave tonight. Are you and Lucien ready?" they’re leaving. I smiled bitterly before continuing to gaze out the window. The sun was beginning to set.

 

"Good. Just as planned. Be careful not to tell her anything. Papa and I are ready for tonight." I responded casually, like two coworkers talking about their job.

 

"Just make sure this will work, Lilianna." That was the last thing I heard before he left my room.

 

I felt numb, remaining in my spot until nightfall. Until it was time to execute the plan. Dad and I pretended to argue, aligning with the plan. When we heard the commotion caused by Calcifer, dad’s pet cat, we rushed out of the room, and we saw my mother, shocked and scared. She ran downstairs, and dad acted by calling out her name.

 

I followed her and quickly blocked her way. I acted. But part of me truly wanted to hurt her, yet I restrained myself until she called for Azriel’s help. Even though it was part of the plan, even though we were just acting, his attack on me felt real, and I nearly coughed up blood from the force that threw me against the wall. Tears streamed down my face as I watched them leave. Dad quickly helped me up, but I couldn’t stop myself from crying.

 

"Arioch…" I turned my back on him.

 

"I-I’m fine… Papa." I knew he wanted to say more, but I immediately followed the two of them. I chased them, watching from a distance until they reached the shore… I was there, just watching.

 

I knelt on the fine sand as I watched them disappear from my sight. I couldn’t stop the pain I felt. I stayed there for what felt like an eternity until it rained. I didn’t move or get up… I had no strength left until I felt myself slowly collapsing onto the sand.

 

. . .