Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2:

~ ALINA ~

My lips stretch into a smile, my mind easing as I sidestep him. “You shouldn't worry about that though. We used to attend to visitors together back then. This won't be any different and I intend to do this as a surprise visit.”

He let me.

I push the door open, my heart pounding in my chest. And I used to be glad of my ability to be able to see only him even in the midst of crowds but now, I'm regretting it.

Because Asher is leaning against a half naked woman sitting on his desk, papers scattered around them.

A breath lodges in my throat.

I don’t scream. I don’t move. I don’t make a sound.

I just watch.

Her legs are wrapped around his waist, his shirt unbuttoned, lips barely inches from hers—both lost in a world I don’t belong to. Not anymore. Maybe I never did.

"Asher," I whisper, but my voice breaks before it reaches him.

His head snaps to me.

And when his eyes land on me, there is no shock. No guilt. Just… surprise. Like I’m a forgotten memory come to life.

The woman on the desk narrows her eyes at me. She doesn’t bother hiding the possessiveness in her gaze as she leans in to rest her chin on his shoulder.

"Asher," I say again, this time stronger, stepping into the room even as the walls threaten to collapse around me. “You said I could come.”

“Go.” He says to the woman clutching to his chest. “We'll see later.”

She says nothing as she hops down the table and adjusts her gown. Then, she rounds his chair and pulls open the hidden door there.

Only Asher and I knew of that door. But…

He straightens up, buttoning his shirt without hurry, his blonde hair tousled. “I didn’t think you’d be this early.”

This early?

As if I interrupted something mundane. As if I’m not the mother of his child—the woman who broke her body and lost her wolf to bring him into this world.

“Who's she, Asher?” I ask, tears already slipping down my face.

He sighs. “She's Claire.”

“Claire?” I ask, trying to tune out the sound of my heart breaking as I walk towards his desk as slow as I can, like if I walk too fast, not only will my heart break, but my body too.

He closes his eyes as he draws his chair closer and drops on it. “That’s it. You are overreacting again.”

Overreacting?

I say nothing.

His green eyes meet mine. “She's my mate, Alina.”

“And what am I?”

“You were chosen for me. She's my fate.”

“Have you been waiting for her for years? Is that why you didn't mark me?”

His lips form into a thin line, his fingers tapping the desk fastly.

“Is it because it's an arranged marriage?” I ask again, my voice breaking this time. “But I thought it turned out to be real. The line blurred, Asher. I thought we had something together…”

He says nothing and I lean my tired body on my arms on his desk.

And before I can stop myself, the words are out. "I kept the pregnancy because of you, Asher. Even when the doctors said I wouldn't survive it. I—"

“I didn’t ask you to do that for me,” he says, interrupting me.

My breath catches.

I didn't ask you to do that for me.

I want to scream.

Goddess I need to scream.

But I'll be overreacting.

So instead, I ask,

“Is she why you no longer come to visit me with him?”

“Part of. But that's because… well, it's just there.” He adds with a shrug.

My mouth parts, but no words come out.

Just there?

Something inside me cracks. Loud. Final.

I straighten up, forcing my hands off the desk, afraid I’ll either collapse or reach across it just to feel something—anything.

“You made me believe it meant something,” I murmur, blinking back the burn in my eyes. “The nights. The promises. That stupid music box you said reminded you of me. I still keep it at that cold place, keeping it sterilised every time.”

He doesn’t reply.

“Do you love her?” I ask, swallowing down the shame of needing to know.

He hesitates.

And it’s that hesitation that kills me more than a yes ever could.

My hands curl into fists.

“You once said you’d tear the world apart for me, Asher. Were you lying?”

“I was wrong,” he says quietly. “I didn’t know what fate really meant back then.”

I let out a shaky laugh—one that has no joy in it. Only disbelief.

“And what about choice? Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

Silence stretches between us.

Then, softly, bitterly, I say, “You know what hurts the most?”

He looks up.

“That I still hoped. Even after everything… I still hoped you’d choose me.”

“But she's my fated mate, Alina. You know I can't resist the pull. And… I didn't mark you for a reason.”

The tears are spilling down my eyes more and I don't bother hiding it. I fall to the seat opposite him, suddenly feeling cold.

How do I tell the sea I'm drowning in land?

But that's even if I get to see the sea again. I can't believe I sacrificed everything, even my life, for this man. I just wanted to give him someone that's in our image. Maybe he'll stay with me if we have Kael even though he was never mine to keep.

I should have suspected when he didn't mark me but I bit down the shame, anger, and regret. I blink back the tears and ask him,

“Why didn't you mark me?”

He sighs. “The seer at the hospital…” He hesitates before continuing. “She said you can start healing faster if your fate marks you.”

I blink.

Once. Twice. Let the words settle like frostbite on my bones.

“So… you didn’t mark me because you thought someone else would?”

He says nothing.

“But you knew,” I whisper. “You knew the Moon Compass never pointed for me. You knew my fate doesn’t exist.”

His gaze flickers up, guilt shadowing those green eyes.

“I didn’t want to believe it,” he murmurs. “I thought maybe if I didn't mark you, it would spare you from a lifetime of settling.”

“Settling?” I breathe out a hollow laugh. “I wasn’t settling, Asher. I chose you.”

He winces.

“You were never a compromise to me,” I say, softer now. “You were everything.”

I reach into my coat pocket and place the tiny carved wolf figurine on his desk. The one he made for me that night under the full moon, when we still believed in “us” or… when I still do.

“I was never waiting for fate, Asher. I was waiting for you. But you… you were just waiting for a way out.”

His mouth opens, but no words come.

I stand slowly, my legs unsteady.

“I won’t beg,” I whisper. “Not for love. Not for a place in your life.” I hesitate before asking the words I always dread.”

“Are we getting divorced now?”

“The pack already knows I found my fate. And the mating ceremony would make us stronger.”

I used to make up for the absence of the strength that comes with the mating ceremony by being a warrior Luna. I lost that too.

I used to be Luna.

I guess I was just the placeholder.

So, I nod slowly. Once. That's all I can manage.

“I should see Kael.” I whisper, voice trembling.

He inhales deeply and leans against the backrest of his chair. “He's with her.”

My heart stills, fear starting to settle in. “Who? Claire?”

“He's been spending time with her lately since for the first time, he believes we look like a family.”

“But he doesn't know her.” I say in disbelief, fresh waves of tears spilling down my eyes. “He's my son. Mine.”

“He calls her Mom now, Alina.”