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CHAPTER 10: BORROWED PEACE

Author: Cësca
last update Last Updated: 2025-08-05 01:23:05

I like what I see when I look in the mirror. He likes it too. That’s why he keeps me close. I’m an ugly, horrible teenage boy. The girls never bother turning my way. The boys shove past me like I don’t exist. But him–he always notices.

My lacrosse teacher.

He says I’m special. Sweet. He told me he loved me last week. As long as I make him feel good, he’ll keep loving me. He’s the owner of my body. Maybe my soul too.

HOSEA

I promise Xavier I’ll let go.

He made me swear on it this morning while half asleep, tugging my blanket over my head and mumbling, “You’re making yourself crazy, Hosea. Just stop.”

So I say I’ll stop. I say it because he won’t leave me alone otherwise. Because his eyes are tired of narrowing every time I bring up Matthew’s name.

I mean it too. Or at least, I want to mean it.

The dormitory buzzes with morning noise–people late for class, others too early for breakfast. Xavier yanks me out of bed with more energy than I know he has this early in the morning. “You’re
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  • The LInes We Crossed   CHAPTER 10: BORROWED PEACE

    I like what I see when I look in the mirror. He likes it too. That’s why he keeps me close. I’m an ugly, horrible teenage boy. The girls never bother turning my way. The boys shove past me like I don’t exist. But him–he always notices.My lacrosse teacher.He says I’m special. Sweet. He told me he loved me last week. As long as I make him feel good, he’ll keep loving me. He’s the owner of my body. Maybe my soul too.HOSEA I promise Xavier I’ll let go.He made me swear on it this morning while half asleep, tugging my blanket over my head and mumbling, “You’re making yourself crazy, Hosea. Just stop.”So I say I’ll stop. I say it because he won’t leave me alone otherwise. Because his eyes are tired of narrowing every time I bring up Matthew’s name. I mean it too. Or at least, I want to mean it.The dormitory buzzes with morning noise–people late for class, others too early for breakfast. Xavier yanks me out of bed with more energy than I know he has this early in the morning. “You’re

  • The LInes We Crossed   CHAPTER 10: BORROWED PEACE

    I like what I see when I look in the mirror. He likes it too. That’s why he keeps me close. I’m an ugly, horrible teenage boy. The girls never bother turning my way. The boys shove past me like I don’t exist. But him–he always notices.My lacrosse teacher.He says I’m special. Sweet. He told me he loved me last week. As long as I make him feel good, he’ll keep loving me. He’s the owner of my body. Maybe my soul too.HOSEA I promise Xavier I’ll let go.He made me swear on it this morning while half asleep, tugging my blanket over my head and mumbling, “You’re making yourself crazy, Hosea. Just stop.”So I say I’ll stop. I say it because he won’t leave me alone otherwise. Because his eyes are tired of narrowing every time I bring up Matthew’s name. I mean it too. Or at least, I want to mean it.The dormitory buzzes with morning noise–people late for class, others too early for breakfast. Xavier yanks me out of bed with more energy than I know he has this early in the morning. “You’re

  • The LInes We Crossed   CHAPTER 9: TURNING TABLES

    SIMEONMornings are the only time this place feels honest.Before the noise starts, before people slip into the masks they wear for the rest if the day, there’s a quiet clarity to these walls. That’s why I came in early. The nightmares had done their work, tossing me out of bed before dawn with too much adrenaline and not enough rest.If I couldn’t start the day rested, I could at least start it ahead.The corridors are empty when I arrive. My footsteps echo faintly off the polished floors, sharp in the stillness, like I’m trespassing in a place that hasn’t yet remembered it’s alive. I like this version of the school. Clean. Controlled.But the stillness doesn’t last.Somewhere ahead, faint at first, comes a sound that doesn’t belong to the quiet. A breathy gasp, a soft thud, the unmistakable rhythm of skin meeting skin. I stop, not because I’m curious, but because noise this early feels like a disruption that demands to be acknowledged.The office two doors down is slightly ajar. I s

  • The LInes We Crossed   CHAPTER 8: HOW TO VANISH QUIETLY

    “You know the funny thing about mirrors?” The boy's voice is soft, but the classroom is so still that it might as well have been a shout. “They don’t always show you what’s really there.” I glance up confused.“What’s that supposed to mean?” He looks at me with an eerie smile before slowly walking out the classroom. What a weirdo. HOSEA Sister Monica’s office is at the far end of the administration block. The door is always open during the day, but the shadows that cluster around the doorway somehow make it feel less inviting. She sits behind a carved oak desk, papers neatly stacked to one side, a small iron cross resting on a wooden cupboard that looked large enough to hide bodies behind her. She wears her habit with precise care–immaculate and unbending. Her eyes, pale gray and sharp, find us the moment we walk in. “Come in boys,” she says, voice smooth like stone in water. “Close the door.” We obey and suddenly the room feels so much smaller. “I’ve been told there’s been

  • The LInes We Crossed   CHAPTER 7: WHAT WERE WE?

    There was a time when I thought Aaron hung the damn stars in the sky. I thought no one else had a voice like his–low, slow, daring. I had felt like no other fingers could map a body the way his did, like he’d studied mine in the dark and memorized every nook and cranny, every soft gasp, every spot that made me tremble.I used to wake up thinking of him.I used to fall asleep still tasting him on my lips.Sometimes I still do. But now, he’s not here and all I have are the countless painful memories.Right now, I’m in class. Mr. Eden is droning on about colonial trade routes but the chalk keeps squealing and my thoughts are far from the blackboard. They’re in the past, tugged back to Aaron’s dorm room the night before his major exams. The fan had been busted and the room was thick with heat, sweat sticking our skins together as if the air wanted to hold us there forever.**************************************

  • The LInes We Crossed   CHAPTER 6: FLUORESCENT LIGHTS

    “The scariest part about disappearance isn’t the silence–it’s how quickly everyone learns to live with it.”HOSEAThe red in my vision is slowly clearing. Xavier stands there right before me, arms wide, grinning like some comic book villain who’s missed his cue. Same haircut, same scuffed prefect badge, same untouchable confidence.My hands clench and unclench before I ball them into fists.“You think that’s funny?”“Actually? Yeah,” he says, still chuckling. “Figured you’d clock me quicker, you’re getting slow.”“I almost broke your nose!”“But you didn’t.” Xavier shrugs, as if that settles everything. “Come on, hug?”“No.” I push past him, fury buzzing under my skin. “You ignore every single text I’ve sent through the damn counsellor. I’ve called your parents several times and your grand idea of a comeback is body slamming me into the lockers? What is fucking wrong with you?”“Dramatic entrances are my thing,” he trots after me “I thought you’d appreciate the flair.”“Why did you th

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