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Penulis: Livia
last update Terakhir Diperbarui: 2026-01-05 22:47:47

“This is fucking messed up.”

I said nothing. I just stared out the café window like something out there might suddenly make sense. People passed by, laughing, talking, living their lives like the world hadn’t just cracked open for me.

I was pregnant.

I was actually, truly pregnant.

The words didn’t even feel real in my head. They floated there, distant and heavy at the same time.

I felt numb.

Completely numb.

What am I supposed to do now?

A tear slipped down my face before I even realized I was crying.

Jenny, for the first time since this nightmare started, had no words. She just sat there staring at me like she was afraid I might disappear if she blinked.

I watched people walking in and out of the café. Some of them looked happy. Or maybe they were just pretending to be happy, the same way I’d been pretending for weeks now.

I looked down at my hands. The crying I did earlier in my room before Jenny practically dragged me out wasn’t enough. It didn’t even scratch the surface. I wanted
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  • The Man Who Taught Me Sin    Separated Lines

    Kassy“Where are you going?” Derrick asked, and he had the audacity to look confused.I stared at him like he had lost his mind.“Back to my husband,” I snapped. “You know, because I’m married.” My voice shook, anger and panic mixing together. “What do you even mean you want us to be together? You want me to go and divorce him? This is insane. I’m insane for even being here with you, and you’re insane for saying that to me.”The words came out sharp and bitter but I didn’t take them back.I sighed, running my hand through my hair.We were still in the car. Still in the mess we had created just minutes ago. My body was tired, my heart even more exhausted.“You’re insane,” I said again, my voice quieter this time as I reached for my clothes. “I don’t even know why I keep ending up in this position with you.”I pulled my dress back on with shaky hands and pushed the car door open.Before I could step out, Derrick rushed forward and slammed the door shut.The sound echoed inside the car.

  • The Man Who Taught Me Sin    Winged Out

    KassyI almost dropped the piece of paper on the ground.My fingers trembled as I unfolded it, my heart slamming so hard against my chest it felt painful, like it wanted out. The words blurred for a second, then came into focus.Come outside….Left wing….I need to see you. —DerrickDerrick is here?My pulse roared in my ears.How is Derrick here?My mind scrambled, thoughts colliding into each other. Shawn glanced at me, concern flickering across his face. “Are you okay?” he asked softly, his hand brushing my arm.I had no idea what he saw on my face, but it must have been something alarming for him to show concern.I nodded quickly. “I’m fine,” I said, forcing a smile that felt stiff and foreign on my lips.The lie slid out easily. Too easily.“I… I need some fresh air,” I added, already pushing my chair back.“Okay,” Shawn said“I’ll be right back,” I turned and walked away before he could say anything else, my heels clicking against the floor far too loudly.What am I even doing?

  • The Man Who Taught Me Sin    Quiet Hope

    “I can’t believe you’re carrying this out, this is madness,” Jenny says.I ignore her and keep staring at myself in the mirror.The boutique is quiet, soft music playing in the background, fabric everywhere. Bridal fittings. White, lace, silk. All things that are supposed to mean joy. I’m standing on a small platform, the dress hugging me perfectly, the mirror reflecting a version of me that looks calm, composed… happy.I look beautiful.And that somehow makes everything hurt more.“Kassy,” Jenny calls again, her voice softer now, like she’s afraid I’ll break if she pushes too hard.“Let it be, Jenny. Seriously,” I say, still not looking away from my reflection. “I need him to protect my child, and he needs me for his company. Win-win.”Saying it out loud makes it sound logical and clean….Like a business deal.Jenny shakes her head slowly, disbelief written all over her face. Then she looks at me through the mirror, really looks at me, like she’s trying to see something I’m hiding.I

  • The Man Who Taught Me Sin    All In The Open

    Sitting across from Shawn like this felt familiar and strange at the same time.Familiar because I’ve sat across from him so many times over the years, watching his face, memorizing his moods, waiting for scraps of attention he never really meant to give. Strange because today I'm not trying to impress him…. I'm not trying to please him…. I'm not even a little bit scared of losing him.I want to tell him everything. And surprisingly, I'm not afraid to. I'm not afraid of his reaction, not afraid if he wants to call off the wedding. Maybe…Maybe that's what I really want. Maybe if the cancellation came from him, my parents’ anger would fall lighter on me. Maybe I just didn’t have the strength to be the villain in their story.Or maybe I just didn’t care anymore.Shawn wanted this marriage because of what was at stake for him. His father had too many children, too many potential heirs. Love wasn’t part of the equation. This marriage would secure his position, solidify his future in the

  • The Man Who Taught Me Sin    Open Options

    “This is fucking messed up.”I said nothing. I just stared out the café window like something out there might suddenly make sense. People passed by, laughing, talking, living their lives like the world hadn’t just cracked open for me.I was pregnant.I was actually, truly pregnant.The words didn’t even feel real in my head. They floated there, distant and heavy at the same time.I felt numb.Completely numb.What am I supposed to do now?A tear slipped down my face before I even realized I was crying.Jenny, for the first time since this nightmare started, had no words. She just sat there staring at me like she was afraid I might disappear if she blinked.I watched people walking in and out of the café. Some of them looked happy. Or maybe they were just pretending to be happy, the same way I’d been pretending for weeks now.I looked down at my hands. The crying I did earlier in my room before Jenny practically dragged me out wasn’t enough. It didn’t even scratch the surface. I wanted

  • The Man Who Taught Me Sin    Mix Of Shame

    KASSY“I think the honeymoon should be somewhere far,” my mom says, her voice soft but excited.I nod, pretending to listen, pretending to care. “Yeah, far sounds nice.”But I’m barely hearing her. My mind drifts in and out, floating somewhere between exhaustion and that constant ache I can’t seem to get rid of. The house feels smaller these days, like the walls are closing in slowly, inch by inch.My mother continues talking, going on about beaches and destinations, Greece, Paris, Dubai and all I can think about is how heavy my body feels. How heavy everything feels.“Honey, are you sure you’re okay?” she finally asks, breaking through the fog in my head.“I’m fine, Mom,” I mumble automatically, forcing a smile that doesn’t reach my eyes.She narrows her gaze like she doesn’t believe a word I just said, which….honestly—she shouldn’t.But I couldn't do this right now. I can’t sit here and talk about honeymoons or dream weddings when I can barely keep myself from falling apart.“I have

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