Chapter 4

No one followed me out of the infirmary. My mother stayed beside Leah's bed. My father probably still believed that once the investigation was over, I would come back on my own. Rowan did call my name.

"Selena."

I didn't turn around. Kane followed me into the hallway. It was quiet there. He caught up in a few strides, his eyes settling on my pale face.

"Go see the healer first."

"No."

"You hit that table hard."

He reached toward me, but I stepped away. Kane's hand froze in midair.

"Selena."

For the first time, hearing my name in his voice only made me tired.

"I told you. I'm leaving."

His brows drew together. "I know you're angry."

"I'm not angry."

"Then what is it?"

I looked at him. "I don't want any of this anymore."

Something in Kane's expression finally shifted. But in the next breath, he did what he had always done. He translated my words into anger because that was easier to believe.

"If you want to go back to Silverpine, go."

His voice lowered. "When this is cleared up, I'll come get you."

Even now, he thought I only needed a few days at home to cool down. Then I would wait for him to come bring me back. I stopped trying to explain. Back at the villa, I pulled out a suitcase. After two years in Blackridge, I owned less there than I had imagined. A few pieces of clothing I wore often. My personal papers. The border documents I had compiled over the years. An old necklace my mother had given me.

I didn't touch the formal gowns, jewelry, or silverware Blackridge had prepared for its future Luna. I left everything Kane had given me too. The ring. The cloak. The short blade he had brought back from the North. Even the bottle of perfume on my nightstand that he always said he loved. I left it all behind.

Halfway through packing, my mother finally called.

"Where are you?"

"At the villa."

I heard her relax. "I knew you wouldn't really leave."

"Leah's condition still isn't stable. Go stay in Silverpine for a few days if you need to."

My hand stilled over the clothes in my suitcase.

"Mom."

"Yes?"

"If Leah had been the one shoved into a stone table today, would you still have let her go back alone to pack?"

Silence.

A few seconds later, my mother said, "This isn't the time for that."

I didn't ask again. The answer was clear enough. After I hung up, a message from Rowan appeared.

"I'll take you back to Silverpine later."

I replied, "Don't."

He called almost immediately. I didn't answer. At nine that night, I dragged my suitcase out of the villa. The guard at the gate knew me. The sight of my luggage made him pause.

"Ms. Wilde, are you returning to Silverpine?"

I shook my head. "No."

I offered no explanation and climbed into the car the Northern Border Council had sent for me. As we crossed Blackridge's border, I looked back once. Two years earlier, I had entered Blackridge by this same road. Kane had been waiting at the border himself.

"Welcome home," he'd said.

Only now did I understand that this place had never truly become my home. Thirteen hours later, I arrived at the Northern Border Council compound. The person in charge had already prepared new credentials and living quarters for me. He took one look at my face.

"Do you need a day to rest before you start?"

I shook my head. "No."

From that day on, I was no longer Blackridge's future Luna. I was no longer Silverpine's border representative either. I was simply Selena Wilde.

Back in Blackridge, it wasn't until late that night that everyone finally realized I had not gone to Silverpine. Rowan went to look for me. My mother called again and again.

No one got an answer. Kane was the last to reach the villa. When he pushed open my bedroom door, the room was empty. Most of my clothes were gone. Every document that belonged to me had disappeared. But everything he had given me was still there.

Kane stood in the doorway for a long time without moving.

Then he saw the letter on the desk. An official appointment from the Northern Border Council. Appointee: Selena Wilde. In the lower right corner was the date I had accepted. Yesterday.

That was when they finally understood that I had not been speaking in anger. I had really left.