102. Dinner

“Do you like it?” Josh asked, his voice soft, almost hesitant.  

Ashley turned from the inner balcony. After finishing her makeup, she returned to the window sill and gazed again at the silhouette of the evening sky, which was beginning to glow orange between the tall buildings of Los Angeles. The spring breeze caressed her hair, left loose and flowing. Behind her, Josh stood with his arms crossed over his chest, his face filled with hope yet cautious, as if every word he spoke could either explode or bring comfort.

Ashley stared at him for a few seconds before answering, “It's beautiful. Almost unreal.”

Josh nodded slowly. “Good. I wanted it to feel like that for you.”

That voice made Ashley want to believe Josh was sincere. But trust wasn't something that could appear overnight. There were too many wounds, too many sweet words that had ultimately become bitter memories.

Since arriving at Josh's grandfather's two-story penthouse apartment that afternoon, Ashley still felt like a guest in someone else's dream. She felt free from the shadows of Josh's past—those memories. But even the new surroundings and luxury seemed unable to erase the shadows of the past.

“Ash,” Josh stepped slowly closer, ‘This might sound strange to you, but I want us to start over. Here.’

Ashley looked at him, her eyes tracing the face of the man she once loved so much. The man now standing before her with a gaze full of guilt, yet full of determination.

“Start over? Why?” Ashley asked, her voice soft yet firm. ‘Why, after all that… do you say you want to start over? Was there ever a beginning for us? What beginning are you talking about?’ Ashley shook her head, doubting Josh's words. ‘I think it's impossible. You—’ Ashley couldn't finish her sentence.

Josh didn't respond immediately. Only a sigh was heard between them, then he spoke softly, “I don't know, Ash. I just want us to pause for a moment in this calmness. Whatever it is, I just want to rest from the grip of problems.”

Ashley didn't answer. She only nodded slightly, then walked toward the exit of the room.

"Take a shower. I'll wait outside.”

That night, Josh took her to dinner at a Michelin-starred restaurant in a luxurious hotel in the city center. Fine dining, a luxurious rooftop, with city lights surrounding them from all directions like an inverted sea of stars.

Ashley wore a simple black dress she had packed in her carry-on luggage. Her hair was neatly tied up, with a few soft curls falling beside her face. She was dressed formally as usual, and Josh looked at her with a different gaze that night.

They sat at a corner table facing west, watching the sun not yet fully set behind the LA horizon.

“Thank you for coming with me tonight,” Josh said as he poured wine into his glass. ”I know you're still angry. And you have every right to be. But... I want you to know that I'm not just doing this because of my family's punishment. I've really thought long and hard about us. About moving here. About the future.”

Ashley stared at the red liquid in her glass before lifting her head and asking softly, “The future? You mean the two of us? In this city?”

Josh nodded. “Yeah. I want us to start fresh here. You, me, and… maybe later, more. I want a new life. Without lies. Without the burden of the past.”

Ashley chuckled, not because it was funny. “Without the baggage of the past? If only it were that easy to pack a suitcase. I know you can't just leave it behind like that. Whatever your plan is, I'm not comfortable with you constantly bringing up this ‘fresh start’ thing. It sounds like a joke to me.”

Ashley sighed, setting down her glass. “Besides, you said your boyfriend is sick. His mental state is unstable. You even said you're afraid he'll hurt himself if you leave him. And now you're leaving him in Korea, alone, just like that?”

Josh fell silent. Soft jazz music filled the silence between them.

“I... I talked to him. I apologized, I explained everything,” Josh finally said.

“And you think that's enough?” Ashley stared at him sharply. “What if he tries to kill himself again? What if he feels you betrayed him after all the promises you made?”

Josh lowered his head, his hands clutching the tablecloth tightly. “I tried, Ash. I really tried to hold on, because I felt guilty, because I felt sorry for him. But I can't keep living like that. I'm starting to die inside.”

Ashley felt her chest tighten. She knew that guilt. She knew how hard it was to try to love someone who kept hurting themselves. But that wasn't a reason to betray her, was it?

“I don't understand your way of thinking,” Ashley asked softly. “Do you think moving to LA will just erase all those problems? What do you expect from me, Josh? That I'll just believe you? That I'll be able to pretend to play husband and wife with you?”

Josh looked up, his gentle brown eyes now tired yet honest. “I don't expect you to trust me right away. But I'll do anything to make it up to you. Even if that means starting over from scratch. As friends. As someone willing to prove that I'm not a coward who'll keep hurting you.”

Ashley shifted her gaze toward the sky. Night was creeping in, and the city's lights were growing brighter. Below, the world kept moving. But here, on this rooftop, time seemed to stand still. Letting two people weigh each other, stare at each other, unsure of where to go next.

“If you really want to start over,” Ashley said without looking at him, ‘you have to be brave enough to resolve your past first. Close everything. Don't let me be the reason someone loses their mind.’

Josh stared at her intently. ‘I know. And I will do that.’

For the first time that night, Ashley smiled. Thinly, but sincerely. Not because she believed him, but because she wanted to give them—and herself—a little breathing room.

They continued their dinner in an awkward silence. Occasionally, Josh talked about his work plans at his grandfather's company, about the apartment that could still be renovated to Ashley's liking if she wanted to change it, and about other possibilities. Everything was about their plans together in this city.

Until it all started to sound like promises, but Ashley knew: promises aren't stronger than proof.

When dessert arrived, Josh suddenly said, “If you want to leave here anytime, if you feel this is all too much... just say so. I won't keep you in a cage you didn't choose. But, one thing's clear: it's not divorce. I can't give you that.”

Ashley looked at that face—the one that had once made her fall in love, the one that had also made her cry for days. Now that face was looking at her not as an owner, but as someone trying to fix the damage they had caused themselves.

“I can't promise I'll stay,” Ashley replied softly. “But after today… I'll try.”

Josh nodded. “That's all I can ask.”

Under the night sky of LA, amid the glow of streetlights and the gentle spring breeze, Ashley didn't know if this was the beginning of a new chapter or just a pause before the next storm. But for a moment, she allowed herself to savor the silence that felt like hope.